We have a wedding on Saturday and dh is in the bridal party and i am left alone to try my best to keep my 2 kids under control..anyway they have requested no gifts and want money instead..si how much money do you give them...I hate giving money as a gift I would prefer to give them a gift voucher to somewhere so they could at least by themselves something but anyway not my wedding...so how much $$$$ should i put in the card????
I gnerally go with between $30 and $50 when I buy a gift...50 is for the close friends/family. it really depends on what u're willing and can afford to spend. obviously if DH is in bridal party u must be pretty close to the ppl
I would say $50 - $100 given that your DH is in the bridal party.
ETA: I have never given money as a gift - even if it is "requested". I don't agree with the idea so I always get them a nice gift. Who is going to argue with you??
Last edited by Aimz; January 21st, 2009 at 01:09 PM.
same here - depends on how close i am to the couple - and how much i've already laid out to be at/in their wedding. as a member of the bridal party, if you've forked out for your own suit (well your DH), i would feel no obligation to give them a gift as well - or if i did, i'd buy them something i knew they could use. i was a member of a bridal party, they had a wishing well, but i'd spent a small fortune out on stuff for the wedding so i bought them something small i knew they didn't have
dont' ever feel you HAVE to give money - it's a preference - if they are to preious to appreciate a gift then they don't deserve anything at all!
I would say $50 to $100 depending on the closeness also.
My mum always goes by the reception ie 3 course meal price would be 40 + 10 for drinks (she doesnt drink alcohol) so she would give $50
hth
DH has already forked out $100 for a shirt $50 for pants and another $50 for shoes plus having to pay for the bucks night...oh and we have to buy our own drinks at the wedding they decided to not included drinks so I am sure that is going to add up on the night as well...
so whe i look at it like that we have/will have spent over $300 on there wedding plus what ever we decide to give them...I just hate giving money because i don't want them to think we are tight a** because we did not give them $200 cash IYKWIM...but the groom was in our bridal party and didn't give us anything..if he did it would have been a $30 JB Hi fi voucher..more for dh then me lol
Well in that case Von i would maybe just get them a small personal gift that is not expensive. I am sure they wont expect any money when it has already cost you so much
Some people just put a empty card and put the money into the actual well not in with the card. Then they just wrote that they put some money into the well in the card, this way no one felt uncomfortable:-)
We asked for money as a gift, but some people still bought us things. We only asked because we didn't need anything. We didn't mind either way though. We used the money to pay for our honeymoon.
We generally got between $50 & $100. XH's boss gave us $30 & the girls in the office put in $20 each, so that was $60.
The majority were $50. We also gave $50 at a wedding we went too,as well as a small gift.
In your case, don't worry about the money. I honestly didn't remember who gve me what when it came to the money. I don't think any of our bridal party did.
It really does depend on how well you know the people and how much "free cash" you have to contribute. What you earn is obviously a big factor. When we were married we had a mixture of what people gave - ranging from $50 to $300 (from closer friends - who have well paying jobs). To aquaintances we've given $50 and to very good friends/family we've given $300 - but it's totally individual. Trust me, no one will judge you on how much you give - you can't look a gift horse in the mouth!
Good luck controlling your younglings! (What a fun day it'll be for you! )
I started a thread up about this topic about mid last year
DP & i agreed on $70 ... but when i saw the reception venue & could see it was very lavish & luxurious i popped in another $10 without DP knowing ... so total cash gift was $80 (that's for the two of us) ... With family we give between $80 to $100 in cash gift if asked for in the invitation !!
P.S - I put the money in a envelope with the wedding card BUT i didn't seal it just incase there ended up being a wishing well at the reception to put just the money in a seperate envelope, which there didn't end up being so everyone looked ridiculous walking around the reception with the 'envelope' until about 30mins later it was announced that everyone put their Kind Donations as it was expressed into the box sitting on the bridal party table ... felt embarrassing to go up & do with everyone taking turns after each other to put their 'secret amount' of cash gift into what felt like a charity box towards the bills of the grand Wedding, LOL !!
Last edited by smiles4u; January 21st, 2009 at 04:30 PM.
I find it really embarrassing to be asked for cash..I dont know why, its much easier than having to go shopping for a gift, but it still seems cringey to me for some reason
I have happily contributed money for a honeymoon though, where I had to do a payment into a travel agent's account for the couple. I dont know why this didn't bother me.
I guess it might be catching up with the couple who we had given cash to after their honeymoon and having them show us the watch & the new clothes etc they had bought with their wedding money...it all seemed frivolous stuff and nothing that was setting them up for a life together ie house deposit or furniture etc.
Winter's post explains perfectly what I would want to see. It is not that hard to ask people to put contributions twards say a deposit for a house, or some whitegoods that the couple need, but money for money's sake is a bit rude IMHO.
What DH and I have decided to do this year is go to the Oxfam shop and buy an "Unwrapped" gift. The wedding specific one costs $78, and is apparently equivalent to buying two goats for a family, and gives info about this. We got four for our wedding and each one brought me to tears, and that's why I give it to other people now. Sometimes we chuck in a little bundle of home baked cookies too.
We have SO much to be thankful for in this country, so I too am offended by people asking for money. How often do you say to a charity collector "Oh, no, I can't afford it..." Well, I'm shouting them a charitable donation :-)
(There's an Oxfam shop at Knox, near borders. Or one at Camberwell)
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How much $$$ for wedding gift
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I find it really embarrassing to be asked for cash..I dont know why, its much easier than having to go shopping for a gift, but it still seems cringey to me for some reason
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