I wasn't sure where to put this, but I think this is about right. Sorry if its not.

Anyway, my 30th birthday is fast approaching. I'm not looking forward to it, for a number of reasons. Mainly all the things I wanted to achieve by 30 that I haven't and won't.

My mother is asking me what I want to do for my 30th and the truth is I have no idea.

My three best friends live interstate and I highly doubt any of them would be able to make any sort of party. Plus I don't drink and tbh, I don't find much joy in watching other people get very much intoxicated. I also only have work collegues which are very much older than myself, there is only one there that really bothers to be interested in my life, even then it doesn't extend past the office though I have made offers and suggestions. I have two more older friends which came about as our children are best friends, so again not overly close. My best friend from high school who again, not overly close to any more, though not for lack of trying. Put it this way we are meant to be best friends, I was the last to be told about her engagement. I have my mother (who really wants me to let her know what I'm doing) and my sister (our relationship is okay, though like all siblings we have love to hate each other sometimes too and grate on one another's nerves). I have nothing to do with my father. My step brother has moved in next door, and it has become very obvious as to how much my Step father just tolerates us for my mother. So I guess in all this its also making it very obvious how alone I feel most days, as I have no one close by to which I can offload and talk to etc either. I have no partner.

Mostly Im okay with this situation, until things like important life events happen to come up and really, I feel like, why bother? What's the point? Can't I just be an ostrich about it all?

So I don't know what to do about the whole turning 30 situation. What would you do for your 30th given the above feelings?