Anyone eloped?

[Isadora]

After doing a couple of weeks worth of wedding research, we are seriously considering eloping, just the two of us with our DD, due to the ridiculous cost involved with getting married! The destinations that have made the shortlist are: Broome, Bali, Cairns or the Gold Coast. We would prefer to marry in Australia as we want the Australian marriage certifcate. Has anyone eloped, any tips?

[satya]

Haven't done it but would love to. The only thing that stops us is that we know our parents would be really disappointed if they missed out on seeing us wed.

My ex and I almost did it. We wanted to marry in Hawaii but when family got wind of it they wanted to come along too. It all got too complicated so we didn't do it. We ended up with a tiny wedding in the Dandenongs & a honeymoon in Hawaii instead. That kept the family happy.

If you do decide to do it make sure you don't tell anyone of your plan or someone could just talk you out of it. Just say you are going on holiday and announce the marriage on your return.

[Salsa]

We seriously considered it, but thought of going o/s to do so.
We decided against it as the more we looked into it, we knew as Satya said
(1) family would get upset
(2) if we did tell them we knew that some of them would want to come too!

We ended up having a smallish informal outdoor wedding insted.

[thepixie]

Yep, the Bear & I eloped in December 2006. We hadn't been together very long (6-7 months), so no-one was really expecting it. We told absolutely no-one. We were going on a round the world trip anyway, and our first stop was San Francisco. We took a side trip to Vegas and got married in a brand new bright red Ford Mustang convertible which we hired for the few days we were there (the Bear wanted to bring the car home!). Everyone was great about it after the fact (what choice do they really have anyway?) my mum was briefly disappointed but she has never been particularly involved in my life so she didn't harp on it much. My stepmum (who I'm very close to) was disappointed cause she would have loved to be involved in my wedding. My dad was completely ecstatic because as far as he was concerned it saved him shelling out $50K for a wedding (which I would never have asked him to do BTW). My brother was the most shocked, we had seen him in Australia at Christmas, met him a week later in Spain and had got married in the meantime. The Bear had been married before so his family didn't make a fuss about it.
As to cost, apart from the flight (from memory around $2500 ish which was pretty standard then for a RTW ticket I think) and the car hire the costs were:
Licence USD$55
Wedding chapel USD $45
Tip for minister USD $60 (discretionary)
Cheapest wedding in history! Because we spent so little on the wedding itself, we could afford to stay in nice places in the States, Spain, Switzerland, England and Thailand over the course of the trip. We arrived in Vegas at 5 in the afternoon on the day we got married and didn't start 'organising' the wedding until we got to the hotel room, we were married by 7.30pm.
For us it was great - it was completely intimate, there was no big hoopla, no sense of pressure, no one else's expectations to manage. We were parked outside the Wedding License Bureau and we looked at each other and said "are we going to do this?". We could have just driven away and laughed about it, no one would have known anything about it, so there was absolutely no sense of pressure. We both agreed we would go ahead and do it, and we have never regretted it for a second!
I have a few friends who have eloped in Australia and have found that to be great too.
Good luck with whatever you decide!

[Joeve]

I want to elope but DP won't hear of it! He has a big family and they all would be cranky with us whereas my large family are all weddinged out! I have had two friends elope, one to Port Douglas and another to Cairns and they both loved it!

[Ginger]

we are seriousy considering it ourselves. i wouldn't be surprised if we do it next year. i really don't care what anyone else thinks.

[AJC]

Nope - but I think it would be soooooo romantic ! ! ! Good luck.

[AliBaby]

DP and I are eloping at the end of November in Australia. We have told some family so its not really eloping as I wanted tot run things by them and so it wouldnt be such a shock. At first they said they would be sad not to see us say our vows but they know it is what will make us happy. I come from a family where everyone is divorced same as DP so I couldnt imagine anyhting worse than them all in the same room.

We are getting married up at Coffs Harbour. PM me if youwant some more details. We got a great packeage and they have a website if you want some more info.

[ShootingStar]

lol eloped sounds so naughty
But DH and i decided to just have a Registry Wedding. You just have to apply to be married, then wait 1 month and 1 day and then you can be married. You have to book it with them of course and need whitnesses.. but you dont have to invite anyone else if you dont want to. We just invited family. Was a nice little ceremony and just what we wanted.

But my brother and his wife were married in the cook islands. They just had my parents there and my bros best mate.

[Megan]

We eloped to Vanuatu in 2003. Some friends knew but none of our family knew until we got back. We organised it all through the travel agent. There are so many wedding packages available that it's easy to do. Our planning of the actual ceremony involved a half hour meeting with a co-ordinator when we arrived in Vanuatu and then we turned up on the day. Easy and stress free. The whole lot cost us $6000 for 10 days over there and the wedding (which was $1000) Would do it again in a second.

[Isadora]

Thanks girls, some awesome inspiring stories there! I've done so much wedding research, I am exhausted haha! I would LOVE to marry in Vegas, but thats just a tad expensive for us. I am looking at Broome, they have return flights for $189 atm for March 2009. I wonder if March will be too hot in Broome - mind you we would have a sunset wedding on cable beach.

[Muppity]

DH and I eloped last year.

We just organised to go to a country courthouse and got married there. It was just lovely and exactly how we wanted it. It felt so wonderful and romantic running away into the country to this beautiful old building.

[Madham]

I think its a great idea. I have been married before so when dp and i get married we will definetly elop. I had the whole big ceremony thing the first time and i hated it. I dont like being centre of attention. Good luck i hope it all works out for you. Broome will be very hot in March i would think.

[Aimz]

DH and I eloped in September last year to the Greek Islands! Well we planned to elope on our own but ended up taking 30 family and friends with us! It's was INCREDIBLE to say the least and an absolute dream.

In the end it cost the same as what a big wedding here would have cost.

To get around the marriage certificate thing and to avoid hefty translation and apostle stamp costs, we opted to have a courthouse ceremony just before we left the country. This meant our legal marriage was in Australia and our ceremony on Santorini was symbolic. Our guests didn't even know the difference as we didn't feel the need to mention it. It was just a piece of paper anyway!

[Tinsel]

DH and I got married in Scotland in 2005 and it was fantastic. I had tried to organise a wedding with our families here but it got so complicated (who's talking to who, where can we sit them, do we have to invite such and such and my relationship with my family was quite fractured at the time). We told both sides that we were getting married in Scotland and most of them were fine with it. We were really lucky to have friends based in London that travelled up to Scotland and one friend travelled from here and another couple made a detour on their travels. We wanted to spend the money on a trip to Europe and it worked out really well. Our Scottish wedding certificate is gorgeous. Gosh, I just rambled a bit didn't I.

I learnt how to do my wedding makeup before I left and I foolishly thought that I could book a hairdresser for the day but luckily a friend knew a few hair tricks and they did it for me. Our groom took the majority of our wonderful photos.

Your destinations sound wonderful and I'm sure it will be absolutely perfect.

[*Ang*]

Two sets of our good friends have eloped in the past couple of years - one in Sydney and the other in the Gold Coast. Both sets ended up having problems with their families getting extremely upset and offended that they weren't there to help celebrate it. One brides brother was particulary upset and offended as he had always hoped to one day walk her down the aisle as their father had passed away.

I know it is your big day but I think you just need to keep in mind that not everyone will be happy about it.

[AnyDream]

Yes we eloped (first time). You will still need to lodge the intent to marry document a month before you proceed and you need to think about who your witnesses will be (it may mean swearing a good friend or sibling to secrecy). We held a wedding ceremony in our church and a simple reception with friends and family two years later (to the day) when circumstances allowed us to celebrate more fully.

At the end of the day it's about the sacred promise you make to each other. It's nice to celebrate but I think a lot people get caught up in all the hoohaa when marriage was never meant to be about that. I do think it's important to mark the occasion with family and friends in some way but that can just as easily be a week later when you get home from your "holiday" in Broome.

ETA:

you just need to keep in mind that not everyone will be happy about it.

I think it's also true that there WILL be moments throughout the planning of a regular wedding when family members get just as upset over various issues. It's YOUR wedding, you do what you want, it's their job to love you enough to suck it up.

[Gecko]

Hi ,

My DH and i kind of eloped this May we went and got married in Europe. I only told my Mum Dad my brother and my Grandmother as the all live in Austria were we got married. I tried to do the right thing and invited my part of the family, as i have left home quite early and i am living here in Australia now ,with my husband so my mum already misses out on a big part of my life.
The wedding was great and its quite inexpensive, when i got back and wanted to ?register? my marriage here in Australia i was told that it can?t be done which is quite upsetting as it would mean that my DH could just get married again in Australia ??? odd , however after getting my overseas marriage certificate translated ? i was finally able to at least change all my bank acc driving licence and so forth so its all good now...
Back to my story - When we got back home and broke the news to DH family they were quite sad as they also wanted to be part of it ? so we decided now to have a wedding vows renewal in 2010 which is coincidently also our 10 year anniversary and if things go well we might be a mum & dad by then and will do it all in one and have the bub?s christening at the same time...this time round, we will invite close friends and family, but again fly away ( keeps the guest list small) we will be going to the White Sundays /Hamilton Island they have some fantastic packages there and we just tell the people we invite to just bring themself rather than a present. So all in all it will be a WIN WIN situation