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Hi Dee - its been a while. Just read your post. Hope you are not beating yourself up too much about it, I know its easy to say that accidents do happen, but they really are just that accidents. Poor Melissa, am sure that you and the rest of the family are giving her heaps of cuddles atm.:grouphug: And big hugs to poor Bree too.
Oh Dee I hope you, Melissa and Bree are feeling a bit better today. Like everyone else said, don't beat yourself up accidents are simply that - accidents!!!
Thank you so much girls.
If I set myself straight my reasoning for sending Brianna was so I could stay and watch the others as we were on the bank of a river, I thought it was the safer option then having Breezy watch the others around the water. I wish I had taken her, not because I think it wouldn't have happened but because then Bree wouldn't have been in that position, You're right I could beat myself up over this forever and probably will but I do see that what's done is done, I can't change it. Even though I wish I could. It could have been so much worse.
Her meaty bit of her finger above the knuckle is almost completely gone, her bone is exposed, she lost the side of her finger o the knukle joint. She also lost the top pulp of her finger and her nail but she has most of her nail bed intact, They couldn't sew it back on, I was devastated about that. The Surgeon is happy to go the dressings and self healing road, however told me that he thinks it's a write off and needs to be amputated and prettied up at the top knukle. I am hopeful that her body grows new tissue, it won't be the same and it will be gammy looking but atleast her growth plate will allow her finger to continue growing and it won't be so obviously stumpy. They said if she doesn't lose it she can have reconstructive surgery on it when she is grown to give it better form. I am hopeful, it is sooo gruesome looking, I tried hard not to lose it. Michael is coming home tomorrow. We find out if she has to have surgery or not on Wednesday next week. Babies and young children have really amazing regeneration abilities so I really pray that it will grow back to some extent and allow her to have the reconstruction done later.
Oh Dee that sounds worse than I thought from your first post :o I can understand how it would have been hard to keep it together! Bree's lucky to have an ex nurse as her mummy. I'm sure it must be so painful but at least she can trust you to know how to look after it and work out what is the best way of helping it to heal. What did the doctors mean by amputate? Would that involve removing bone? Seems odd. Is the area too small to try a tissue graft? I can imagine that the tip would need tidying up but removing bone sounds a bit extreme for aesthetics's sake. By "lose it" do they mean circulation has been damaged? Sorry for all the questions... I guess i'm wondering how I would cope making these decisions for my child. The pain must be the biggest issue though for her? Finger injuries are very painful as you'd know... I had deep scarring on the side of my index finger when an aerosol can exploded and molten metal ripped away a lot of the skin off the side of it... I can still remember the pain even though I was a child (12). The girls were right: a pure accident, any parent would have made the same decision. I send my nearly 13yo off with my 4yo to public toilets all the time. Geeze the door must have been heavy? Anyhow it'll be a relief to have Michael home! Keep us updated!
Well I'm back on board and I'm estactic, I will try and catch up tomorrow properly but I will do a couple of personals.
Firstly Rory congrats on the arrival of Oliver, he's such a cutie.
Jaspen congrats on the pg, I'll be testing this week so we maybe belly buddies again.
Hi everyone else.
hugs xoxo
hey amanda great to see you back - hope you get a bfp this week.
Dee that is so awful for all of you :(
Hello to everyone else - I am finding it really busy with two at the moment - mostly because I want to keep cuddling both of them LOL!
Hey Bath, lol at all the Q's :) I'll try and answer them. They are saying that yes Melissa is too little for tissue grafting but once she is grown she can have the reconstruction done then BUT they also said that because the damage to that first section of her finger is so extensive, they really don't think it will heal itself enough to be functional and really should be amputated to the first knuckle, so they would like to cut her finger at the top knuckle bone and all and try to close it over with a flap of skin and tissue from the thumb side of her middle finger which would leave it forever stumpy and shorter then her other fingers. I disagree, that is why we are doing the dressing route, I would rather do the see her grow new tissue given time as it will take months of continuous dressings then say to hell with it chop it off Dr cause that is easier and way less hard work. I just think that if we can get it to grow new skin over it we can look forward down the track to a tissue graft I know it will be long and arduous but this is my baby. If it doesn't work well then atleast I can say that I tried very hard to save it. She is on pain stop 4-6 hrly and she has antibiotics, her dressing needs to stay intact for 10 days, I've been putting a very light bandage on top for the dirt factor, she is right handed and keeps trying to use her hand, it's very messy. She is running around semi naked at home because she keps peeing her pants in the toilet my poor baby as she can't whip her knickers down and doesn't sing out when she needs to go, My little miss Independant. I can see it evertime I close my eyes and even as I sit her now I keep covering my mouth and cringing, I am hopeless when it is my Kids, give me someone elses with the same thing not a prop, un effected to a certain degree, but I just fall to pieces when it is my child. I can still count the number of time I've been to the hospital with my children on one hand and still have fingers to wriggle, and with 5 of them I think that is pretty good odds.
Well off to see an old friend from Uni today we are meeting at one of those indoor play centres so should be great, Then I'm off to the school for Brianna's Culminating day and Afternoon Tea and then over to the train to pick Michael up Then to Sil in Brissy for Dinner and to pick up the in laws.
Busy busy day ahead of me.
Dee I was actually thinking that with 5 kids only one missing finger is pretty good odds. Hope that doesn't sound harsh and I hope you know where I am coming from? I worry about things like that cause the more kids the more chances of one of them doing something maniacal - but the flipside is you can have one crazy kid who hurts themselves too! Ah kids - they cause so much fear as well as love don't they!:
I think that is pretty good odds.
Oh Dee, Poor Melissa, but she is young and will probably have forgotten it long before you or Bree do. Like these other wonderfully wise ladies have already said dont beat yourself up about it, you made the best decision at the time, especially if you had other children around water- you weighed up what was of the greatest risk.
Bath- Is today the day you have your MA in for the first time? If so I hope that it all goes really well.
Melb Ladies- how did the your preview go the other night? I hope you all enjoyed your night out.
Ok I have question for those of you with more than 1 baby (child)- How did you feel about bringing home number 2? How did you cope with 2 small children? Did you feel guilty about taking away your 1 on 1 time from your first?
Its just hit me all of sudden that Tori wont be my only baby very soon, and while I am excited it is kinda sad too- I love the time we share together and it is weird to feel that we are going to have to share it with someone else soon. I know she is still little but I would hate for her to feel resentful, or upset, or left out- I would never want her to feel like I loved her any less. I have read the articles on the main site, but I would love to hear some of your experiences.
Anyway as you can obviously see, I am still pregnant- and I am not so much over it as excited to meet my little man. I really would love him to be here by christmas, otherwise he is banned from arriving untill at least 27th.
Better go and take this daughter of mine out, we are off to the Library, then to the shops, and then I coming home to finish cleaning my oven.
Dee- you are doing everything right in my eyes, i really hope time can help heal her finger so part of it doesnt need to be amputated, i cannot magine what i would have done in that situation? i dont know if panic would sink in or natural instint and know what to do. Ive been saying for a long time i want to do my first aid course (did one 10yrs ago but thats a long time ago) and i still havent gotten around to do it, i would never forgive myself if something happened and i didnt do everything to help.
Ali- i was very overwhelmed when i first got home from hospital with Tyron. Nixon senced it for sure, he was very clingy ad upset easily, but i also could not pick him up etc because of my c/s so i am sure this impacted him more. You still will get 1 on 1 time with both children, obviously not as often and they need to share mummy but i really enjoy the times when Tyron is asleep and me and Nixon have a giggle and a roll around on the floor, or when Nixon is asleep and Tyron and I stare into each others eyes!
Then its also great when they are both asleep and i can do soemthing or just hae some me time like catch up on BB!
DH had 3 wisdom teeth out yesterday in day surgery, so i dont have any helping hands from him atm, he thinks he will go back to work tomorrow depends on how he copeswith the pain i think.
Tyron is one sick bubba atm. He has caught the viral infection that Nixon had, but he cannot even cry he has no voice, and his cough is very yukky. Rang the doc again yesterday after i felt he was worse from our visit on Monday, he told me to bring him in today but we have a paed appointment anyway so will see what he says first. He is still drinking, temp is ok but its so aweful hearing him the way he is.
im so de-motivated atm. i really want to get back into excersing, i have a heap of manager stuff to read up on and lots of little chores i need to do but i just cannot pick myself up to get going?
maybe i need to start in-liven again. Bath do you still take it?
Ali- I think we all feel this way when our 2nd or 3rd or what ever number you are up too, as it seems almost impossable to think who you could love another child as much as you love the one you have, But your heart and compassaty to love in a amazing thing, your heart will exapand to love another you will be able to share you time ( even if it is a bit one sided to start with ) But that the joy of having children, you get to see them grow see there personaltys devlop into the wonderful little people they are. Tori will love her brother and be a wonderful big sister and alway remember that she wont remember the tough time that you feel you have I am one of 7 and come in at number 5 two yrs and 4 days after my sister and 20mths before the next sister so mum must have been run of her feet around the time I was a baby/ toddler and I only remember the good times I have with my sisters. Hope you could understand most of that ..
I hope you get your christmas wish.
dee- now I know that you dont want her to lose her finger but I thought I would let you know that my mil lost hers at the same age ( her dad choped it of with a axe ) and she has gone through life just fine she too is a nurse and was a train midwife and she had the only hand that could tell 10 cm with one check as with the missing finger it was the right size.lol plus it was great for babys to suck on it all babies have loved it must be the nub at the end. But I do really hope all the dressings work out and she can re-grow her skin, its a shame it happen now with summer on the way. I will send up a little :pray: for you all .
Well DH has left again cant believe the next time he comes baby christmas will be over ( or starting for us ) gee the years go fast now.. Well better go have to make some chocolate balls for DS christmas party at school tomorrow.
Good afternoon :) Typing one finger, feeding Niall, Wade is sleeping on the couch zonked out by antihistamines because he was stung by a bee for the 5th time yesterday and his foot has blown up. Poor little man can't walk but I took him to kinder this morning and carried him to all the activities. Ali: yes my MA is arriving at 3pm and staying until 6pm today :dance: then DH is on annual leave until early Jan :dance: and today is also Verity's last day of year 7. Dee: I think you are doing the right thing too regarding Melissa's finger. You might as well give it your best shot. I'd do what the doctor suggested as a last resort... in the meantime I'm :pray: that infection doesn't set in and that the skin heals nicely over the wound. Nic: yes, still taking In-Liven, whenever i go off it something bad seems to happen with my health or state of mind or I end up eating too much sugar of an afternoon (it helps to curb cravings). I think I might have another dose now that you have reminded me... so I can power through the afternoon and not want to stop for a coffee and biccy at 4pm when the MA is here.
Rory: good to hear that you are enjoying your boys... I read your schedule (meetings etc) and it sounded a bit full on... these are precious days, i'm glad you are finding the time just to enjoy them :)
Niall finished now... had better take my InLiven and catch up on some other threads before it gets too late... :hello: everyone i missed!
oh no Bath! Wade is like a magnet to bees and getting stung isnt he.... did he tread on it?
Dee - my god, it sounds awful! You've done so well to cope the way you are, and being on your own. I don't think being a nurse makes things easier, if anything it makes it worse as you know exactly whats going on. I think you've made the right call too. Give the finger time to heal and see what happens, then look at your other options. What a story Melissa can tell when she gets older. I hope having Michael back brightens up your day and puts a huge big smile on your face. Enjoy the crazy family time ahead.
Rory - you are a busy little beaver too! Enjoy cuddling your beautiful boys.
Bath - you sound excited!!!! Must be nice to know DH is on holidays very soon. Hope everything goes well with the MA. Poor Wade, having an allergy to bees I know how he feels.
Ali - the documentary was fantastic. It was so good to catch up with the girls and see so many faces there. Maya and I had a good chat about it on the way home in the car and I definately have a different perspective on things now. With regards to bringing the new bub home, I was in a slightly different situation as Chelsea was alot older (3 1/2) and understood more. One thing that was totally different was how relaxed I felt driving home, no anxiety or fear about whether I was going to do a good job and be a good mum, I knew I could. When I got home I put Marley to bed and she slept for hours! Chelsea wasn't really that interested in her at first. Like Nic said, you spend time with whichever one is awake. If both of mine were up, I would lay Marley on the floor, Chelsea on my knee and read stories or sing, something that Chelsea felt included in. The first few weeks are the trickiest but once you get into the swing of things, its smooth sailing. Tori sounds like a very easy going little girl and I'm sure she cope just fine with the changes in the house. Being aware of not making her feel left out will ensure she doesn't (if that makes sense?). I hope bub is listening and stays put until after christmas.
Tali - hope you salvaged the christmas presents! How funny!
Nic - sorry to hear Tyron is unwell, poor bubba. Is awful when they get sick so young. I hope he gets better soon. A boost of vitamins would probably do you the world of good.
Amanda - welcome back online. Good luck for a BFP for xmas.
Chelsea has her graduation dinner tonight and we are all very excited. I have made mars bar slice and baby cup cakes, which I better go and ice.
Hi All
just a quick one - check the time out!!! Can't sleep as too much going around my head. Not on here much atm as we move on Friday and there is so much to do. We have been spending hours and hours at the house sorting bits and bobs out and there's still so much - and packing! I still have so much of that to do i don't think ill get to bed at all tomorrow night! All good though can't complain. not sure when ill be back as we wont have broadband to start with as it take a week or so for DH's work to change it over.
mum and dad have booked tickets to come over for the whole of March so very excited! Oscar and Will being angels while we bore them at the new house - although with no fence and very sandy soil the 'garden' is just a giant sandpit so they are mostly happy outside.
Dee - big ouchy for melissa and poor Brianna feeling guilty! it sounds awful - big hugs to you and definitely not your fault! You made the right choice between river watch and loo expedition and it was just an unfortunate accident.
Ali - wow - so close! I couldn't add anything to Mel's post about having two - she put it so well! Seems abit full on for the first few weeks then once you get used to it its all good.
Nic - sorry to hear Tyron's sick poor mite - hope he gets better soon.
Tali - thanks so much for the card - it's lovely! I haven't sent a single one yet so all our friends and relies in the UK wont get there's til the new year! hopefully next week!
Mel - glad you enjoyed the doco and i could go the mars bar slice right now!!
Bath - how was the MA - hope all good. How's Niall's ear?
Amanda - great to see you back - am joining you in the land of boxes! Hope you get that bfp soon!
Jaspen - how's it going? All good i hope.
Hi to Rory, Gaby's mum and Maya
anyway, will have a little surf then back to bed although i can't imagine ill sleep!
take care all and hopefully be back soon
Julie x
just quickly had Nixon weighed etc today
12.5kg (50th percentile)
88.5cm length (90th pecentile)
46.5cm HC (3rd percentile)
is it normal for the percentiles to be so different? i thiught generally they should run about evenly with all 3 measurments? He always has had a smaller head so i guess nothing has changed there!
eta: and Tyron was 5.4kg, 58cm and 39cm hc, Nixon was almost the exact same measurments at 4months
Nic: don't fret, it's normal for them to be all over the place. None of my babies had/have the same percentile score for all their stats. If anything is even vaguely concerning the nurse will tell you... Verity was sent off to a paed just becuase she was the 5th percentile for weight (50th for the other two measurements) and she was fine... and now she eats more than I do and i wonder every day why I ever worried! Remember the charts are also really old (1970's I think) and many people don't even chart their babies, they just observe things as health, activity and what the parents are like (my DH is quite light so all my children are influenced by his genes).