Hey all, been trying to post since wednesday night but everytime I finally got through reading everything one of the kids needed me or hubby wanted the laptop grrr

SJ - I had fun on Tuesday, sorry I wasn't very talkative, I'm really quite shy the first few times I meet someone (unless I've had a few stiff drinks beforehand lol), DS loves MJ, just would not stop saying "Where's mo-wee? where's mo-wee?" for the rest of the day.

Ali - Everyone else has already said everything that I was going to say, so I just wanted to send you some uber huge hugs xxx

Someone asked what formula we are using, sorry but I forget who it was - we are using Heinz Nurture as it's currently the cheapest down our way at $15.50 a tin (much cheaper than it was when I had DS, back then it was $18.50-$20 a tin!).

Quick question about Infant's Friend - does anyone else notice that it leaves the skin red like it's burned it if some dribbles out the side of their mouth or if they chuck it up soon after having it?
We stopped giving it to Elise a little over a week ago because she always starts screaming not long after she has it, then chucks up, and any that dribbles out of her mouth or gets onto her cheeks and neck leaves bright red marks on her skin like she's been burnt.

afm - Silly me forgot to pack in the pump and bottles of EBM on tuesday, so I had to go for almost 9 hours without expressing d'oh! OMG My BB's were so sore! And now my supply has dropped by half Oh well, I've already done better this time than I did with DS, by this stage with DS I was just starting to recover from the mastitis and my supply had dropped to 50mls a day and by 6wks I was barely getting 5mls a day, so my goal is to get to 6wks 1d with this expressing thing and then just let things happen as they will. Still haven't made the lactation cookies - couldn't get the Brewers yeast last week as it was all sold out, and I can't find the flaxseed meal anywhere at the moment, will have to check out the health food store on wednesdy when I'm at the shopping center.

Sick of this bleeding, or rather I should say spotting, Monday and tuesday it finally stopped, then wednesday morning I woke up with spotting which stopped by lunch time, yesterday morning it started again and stopped by lunch time once more, and now it's started again tonight. Not enough to leave much on a pad, but it's really annoying.

Finally booked in for my GTT test for wednesday, and the 6wk check up for me, as well as one for Elise, and remembered that I'm a month overdue for my pap as well, so will have to get that done as well... and now I've just remembered that Elise will be due for her 6wk immunisations on wednesday and I forgot to book them in to, so I'll have to call up tomorrow and book her in for that too... sheesh wednesday is going to be a busy day for me with Elise getting weighed and measured at 9:30am, my GTT at 9:45am, Check ups at 10am, and the GTT doesn't finish until 12:15... I think I'm going to pig out on chocolate afterwards since I don't get to eat until it's finshed lol

Oh and Elise got weighed and measured on wednesday and has put on 210g and grown 2cm in one week She still just fits into 0000's too, she's so small and dainty lol

Got the biggest smiles from her this afternoon too, not the sleepy I'm-Half-Asleep ones I usually get, but really big wide-awake grins and lots of them too, so beautiful! Makes up for the way it's been here for the last few days.

I think Elise might have reflux, DS had it mildly for the first 6 months, but Elise is way worse than he ever was, lots of screaming from pain, waking up screaming, cycling the legs and drawing them up to her belly, stiff or arching back, really watery chuck and oh my god there is so much of it! We've been through 3 jumpsuits already today from her chucking up so much, and she's feeding constantly because she's so hungry after chucking up half her feeds (I think 5+ chucks post-feed would equal half a feeds worth of milk), sometimes she even chucks up mid-feed or while she's asleep too and then chokes on it, my poor baby girl, so I'm going to mention it to the doctor on wednesday.

I suppose it's my turn now to admit I'm not coping too well right now, I don't think I have PD yet though looking back at how it was after having DS I think I may have had it back then as I didn't bond with him the way I'm bonding with Elise and I left him to play on his own so much just so that I didn't have to deal with him constantly and with the emergency c-sec I had with him that absolutely terrified me when they first mentioned it and then recovering from it afterwards and dealing with the feelings of failure at not being able to have a natural delivery or being able to BF, and hubby being away for work 5 nights a week and me having to do so much on my own with no one there to help me... I've never really looked at it that way before and it does explain all the nights I spent crying myself to sleep after having DS... I've been thinking a lot about it since tuesday, but I don't want to believe it and I hope I don't get it now, but I have to admit I've gone back to my old way of coping with high levels of stress by smoking. I feel really guilty about it, and I know it's an excuse but it's the only way I can cope with things at the moment, the only ME time I get during the day and I can't continue staying up until 1-2am in the morning just so that I can do something for myself alone tht doesn't involve the kids.

Well now I've gotten that off my chest, I'm going to go and have an alcoholic drink of some sort in lieu of a smoke, at least it's the lesser of 2 evils