Anna - you are doing very well, don't you worry! I don't think anyone has their first baby and is 100% certain of what they need to do and what their baby will be like, hence they seek out help from books, websites etc. for what they think is the best way to bring up their baby. Unfortunately there are so many different people saying so many different things, of course it's going to be totally confusing to poor mums and dads!

One of the reasons I have become anti-controlled crying is exactly what you said about them growing up. Because they do grow soooo fast. Today's society has devised and widely embraced all of these many, different routines and ways to make baby more 'convenient' for our lifestyles. I thought it was supposed to be about baby and baby's needs? Maybe it's just me. But they are too young to know how to be manipulative and try to get their own way with us!

I know if I was to do controlled crying, I would later regret missing out on all that cuddle time and comforting my baby - it's all I want to do when my little ones cry. I want to nurture and care for them and in the way I want to do it - and my kids aren't spoilt and naughty little brats from parenting them this way either! I'm very proud of them.

I am not saying those who control cry are neglecting their babies in any way - so anyone please don't think that! I'm all about what works for you, as long as bubs is happy and healthy - that's the main thing in all of this. Gentle for baby, but also gentle for mums and dads.

I know once my little ones become more independent, I will be sad to lose all the 'potential' cuddle time, through crying and comforting them with cuddles as well as in general. As some midwives told me when I had Elijah that as soon as they go to kindergarten/pre-school, often they get a taste for independence and they fly on ahead with a big, 'Bye mummy!'. Apparently moreso the case with girls being more independent quicker. I am going to be very sad the day I lose my cuddly girl to the big wide world... but I wont stop her of course So I am going to enjoy every cuddle I can get

You're doing great - be a proud mummy