I'm 29 y/o and have been married to the love of my life for 4.5 years. We were expecting our first born to be due near our fifth wedding anniversary but 3 days ago we lost our 14 week old baby while I was on an interstate work trip.

I was only supposed to be gone for one night but went straight to RPA from the airport thanks to severe cramping that hurt so badly that only morphine could take it away. My cervix didn't open, and the baby didn't die straight away, as an ultrasound showed a live baby, however the heartbeat had slowed to 104 bpm. I had seen my baby only the day prior after going to ER with very mild cramping and all looked to be OK - a lovely moving baby with 165 bpm heart rate. However I was admitted and an ultrasound showed the following morning that my beautiful baby had passed away through the night.

I had been given a prognosis of possible IUGR at my 12 week ultrasound....perhaps this was why we lost our baby. I just don't know.

I am absolutely devastated and struggling to accept what has happened. I have heard the statistics but I still never thought it would happen to me.

The only positive to come out of the horrifying experience of going through this on my own interstate was that the people at RPA were so, so, so lovely and I will never forget how well they treated me and how much they wanted my baby to be ok as much as me.

I was wondering what people think about going back to work after this? I am planning on going to work tomorrow but I'm still a little emotionally unstable - is this wrong? Do you get back on the horse or is it OK to expect to have some time off?

Thanks for listening.