Recurrent Miscarriage Dilemma!

Hello Ladies,

How are you all going?

32 weeks Dory.... How are you feeling?

Jen, 6 weeks... your little one is sticking :D I hope everything is going well with you!

Dexy... how are you going? You must be 27 weeks now?? I can't see your ticker! Hope all is going well.

AFM AF came very lightly on Thursday afternoon, then heavier on Friday and practically gone by Saturday morning, not sure if I should be concerned or not..! I received an email today from birth.com.au even though I un-subscribed some time ago from the pregnancy updates, they decided to email me with celebrations of a 1 week old baby and topics of discussions for a 1 week old baby. This was a little hard to swallow, but I have emailed them back, pointing out their mistake and hopefully I don't receive another one next week...

Anyhow, just dropped in for a quick hello, to see how you are all doing. I'm not feeling the best today, but telling myself, it's ok, that this feeling is just temporary and will go away soon enough.!

Take care,
Love and Hugs to you all,

Danni

Oh Gem, my poor sweet blossom, that is such poor form from that web site..... I am so so sorry that someone's inability to do their job properly caused so much unexpected heartache. It would have been so unexpected and devastating. Sending you very big hugs and love.

Is that a normal AF cycle for you? And do you mean worried in a good way or worried in a bed way.

Thankyou so much for asking about me. I am feeling pretty good and sometimes, even allow myself a little excitment. I know it sounds crazy, but I am feeling so much better since DH was able to visit our little fur baby cat on Saturday and today. I am amazed at how much better I have been feeling since. Only 12 more sleeps til he comes home.

Dory, I'm not really sure what is normal, I don't feel as though it is normal, but as I had the IUD for years, and fell pregnant soon after having it removed. The first AF after it was removed if I remember correctly, was about 4-5 days, the second was only about 2 days and very light and that was the one before falling pregnant. Before I had the IUD I'm pretty sure AF was around 4 days usually, sometimes 5. Think I might query it with the doc? I have had light spotting occasionally since the weekend.

I haven't heard anything back from the website, so hoping they have taken me off their email list.

Glad to hear your are feeling better, only about 8 weeks to go Dory... !! Hope your kitty cat is doing well. I over heard someone the other day talking about their pet being in the vet for a few weeks and I thought of you and wondered how you were getting on with your poor lil kitty...!

Hope your doing well too Jen and Dexy.

Take care ladies
Love and Hugs to you all
Danni

Oh Gem, how prophetic your words are.... about grief, and not just AF. I am not sure I know what's normal anymore. I suppose really I just stopped worrying about it. In some ways I am comfortable in my own grief. What do I mean by that? I just accept that I am always going to be grieving, and some days are going to be more demanding than others. Do you find that sometimes, just unexpectedly, you feel sad or something innocuous that someone has said, really hurts? I had one recently.... in that parenting course DH and I were doing, one of the topics was acceptance of things in parenting that you can't change. The facilitator used the example of "labour" - and said something like "you might not get the labour you wanted - having to have a caesar instead of vaginal birth". Know what my immediate and unbidden thought was? "Oh yeah, like wanting a baby to take home but having your baby die?" I don't know how I then managed to stay in the room. Sometimes I have to be really careful not to be too harsh on women who don't get the birth experience they want. I suppose we didn't either. In reality I wouldn't want them to have to endure what we have... but sometimes it just hurts and feels like they are being frivolous. I just have to remember that their feelings are real and valid for them, and they aren't likely to have walked the journey that we have. That can be hard at times.

Last night at the parenting course the lady expecting twins, actually spoke a little of what it was like to feel them moving and what it's like to see the twins interacting on the ultrasound. How ironic, that on the way to the course, that was one of the questions I really wanted to ask, but didn't want to reveal my journey and didn't want to seem too desperate for that info, and in the end it was just offered up? It was so nice to hear, sad, but nice. Especially with Nicholas's angel day being today.

The scan went really well today and I got to see my favourite Maternal Fetal Medicine Specialist ( which the lady with the twins from the parenting course is also seeing), who DH and I just adore and he was really reassuring about how things were going. In fact, he was positively brimming with confidence..... what a lovely gift to give us today. Even if I can't believe in my heart of hearts, it's so nice to have his positivity around me. And of course to see him today, as it was during a scan with him that our wee Nicholas' precious plight was confirmed.

So what a day .....and DH stayed home from work, which was just so awesome. And I got to see the fur baby from a distance, of course, but I could see him and hear him. Only 9 sleeps to go. Life just happens in strange ways sometimes. I hope I honoured my little boy today. I kind of think of he and Jayden playing together and Jayden, being the older one in terms of gestation, looking out for wee Nicholas, but regardless our two boys getting up to mischief.

Heya Dexy - hope things are going well for you and DS and DH.

Jenna - how are you doing? 6 weeks.... every day is an achievement and a blessing.

Dory, sorry I haven't replied until now, I have been absent from the forums for a week or so. How are you feeling today? I totally understand your thought process which you were describing from your class. No matter how hard we strive to stay focussed, we seem to think back constantly don't we. The thought process you had is only natural, so don't ever feel bad about it. Actually, I believe I would have thought the same thing. And it made me think about what I said to you in an earlier post about birthing plans. I am sorry if I upset you by that too, because it was very much the same thing wasn't it. Just take each day as it comes Dory, you are doing an amazing job. I didn't check your ticker but you must be 33 weeks now... !

Dexy how are you going?

Jen... whats the latest?

AFM - I have been having a break from the forums for a week or so. I have been in and out, but not really feeling up to replying. I was feeling ill last week, thought I was getting the flu, but it seems to have gone away without too much problems, I had a splitting headache last week and started to get the shakes and temperature fluctuations but it seemed to go pretty quickly. I think I have just been feeling run down and that is why I had those symptoms. Still waiting for the day of the Big News. I am on day 11 of cycle I think... something like that. I am waiting very patiently lol

Hope you are all doing well
Love and Hugs to you all
Danni

Gem - wow you sound like you've been quite unwell.... sometimes I think we're more miserable when we are coming down with something than when we actually have it..... like you I seem to be coming down with something, which then clears up, only to reappear again, when I get too tired. A message there to myself I think. It took me a while to realise it, but one of the early signs of pregnancy for me, is a drawn out illness - like the flu combined with fatigue. My sporting coach always noticed.... LOL... I am hoping thse are the favourable symptoms for you, even though early.......

Oh please don't feel worried about what you said...... I wasn't fazed by it at all! Thankyou for worrying though... it's sweet. I have only been rattled once by something someone said to me on a forum... they had a still birth closer to term and made an assumption that I had not experienced labour, and didn't know what it was like to hold my child in my arms, from whom all physical life had gone, but who was alive still in my heart, hopes and dreams. I almost fired back a comment, in my hurt, but decided that she was still hurting and trying to find a way through... I too made an assumption, that the comment wasn't intended to be hurtful to me and one prior to that, which was that bereaved parents can understand and help each other. Not all can, bit like golf clubs, some work better in some situations, just like people. Doesn't stop me from trying, but I am a little more robust about any rebuffs or what I see as inadvertently hurtful comments in reply. But you my friend, I think would have to try pretty hard to hurt me... not that I am challenging you to.

Had my great nieces christening on the weekend. I felt pretty fluey like I was coming down with something. Just before the service I went to the loo, and on my way back, inexplicably just starting crying and thinking of my wee ones. So I took a moment outside to remember and rejoice their infinite beauty and then got back to the service. My great niece was very brave when the water was tipped on her head and even smiled broadly for the captivated audience afterwards. Such a relaxed little girl.

Went to our first antenatal class last night....again it was one of those moments - excitement tinged with sadness. I am getting better at being around heavily pregnant women and excited expectant couples. Felt quite sad during some of it. At one point the men and women were separated and it was so nice to hear the men outside laughing, really laughing.... I was really glad that DH got to experience that. Some of the expectant dads were just overflowing with excitement, and fear and anxiety and DH even said later, he's actually getting really excited. I have to remember not to rain on his parade.

I am hoping your day of big news in coming.... I am going to celebrate as vigorously as I can for you!

Dexy - you must be high 20's by now.... 28 weeks? Into your third tri - how are you going? Do you have sore hips and SPD and insomnia and tingling arms, and leg cramps and indigestion? Have you had your GD test yet? Hopefully it's all going well. Thinking of you.

Jenna - 7 weeks my friend - how are you coping? The early days are just so full of paralysing fear... well they were for me. Sending lots of sticky and healthy vibes your way.

Hi guys, haven't been posting for a bit, but have been stalking lol

Gem - Huge hugs darl! I had the same feelings over the past few months, just not coping too well with coming on and posting and seeing the ladies I've come to know and love getting down and depressed all the time, made me just want to throw in the towel and give up on the whole TTC thing. It does get better though, and it makes it even more worth it when you do get your sticky BFP after all the heartache you've had to go through because you truly know how much of a miracle your little baby will be :)

Dory - 33 weeks now! Yay! I'm doing ok, we had a bit of a scare last night, I slipped in the bath... but the funny thing is I was already sitting down lol! My butt slipped out from underneath me as I was leaning back, got bubbles and water all over the floor and jarred my back and set off a round of quite painful cramping. Rushed to emergency, had to wait 3 hours before I was seen by a doctor (In that time waiting I had to witness a poor girl around my age as she lost her baby... she was only 6 weeks and had had her dating U/S only last week... all I wanted to do was give her a big hug, she was crying and shaking so much). Luckily bub is doing ok, they checked my HCG levels last night as well, and they were 15,704 so pretty good since exactly 14 days before they were only 29 lol
Didn't get home until almost 3am, and hubby had to be up at 3:30 to get ready for work, poor man. He's been suffering a lot lately since I take out my frustrations on him. There's been a lot of tears & yelling in this household lately lol and usually there's no reason for any of it.
MS has kicked in now too, not impressed as it's always after I eat something really yummy lol.

Hope you're all doing ok, I have to let DS out of his highchair before he starts screaming the house down lol

Hi guys,

Just letting you all know how the Ultrasound went :) Bub is 5.7mm Crown to Rump, measuring 6wks 3 days - 6 days less than we thought, and EDD is March 28th, so not far off what I had guessed it would be.

Heart rate was 120bpm and it looks like a little peanut lol took ages for the sonographer to find it too lol it's sitting right at the back of my uterus, and the sonographer kept on loosing sight of it every time she moved a bit lol

So, the levels from the other night are pretty good for a 6wk 1d blob lol most of the other ladies in my belly buddies group are around the 7,000 to 10,000 mark :)

Hope you're all doing well! Thinking of you all!

jenna - awesome! I am loving the picci - glad you got some good news.

Hi Ladies,

Jen - It's so nice to hear everything is going so well for you. Sorry to hear about the accident in the bath, but good to know everything is fine. That is so nice of you to feel like giving that poor young lady a hug. How sweet. Hope the emotions settle down in your household so that everyone can be at peace with each other, I know it is tough sometimes and I am learning to have more patience with everyone at the moment which I have noticed really helps. Lovely pics, look forward to more in the not so distant future.

Dory - You must be happy and well getting out and about a little more going to classes and your nieces christening. How beautiful, a lovely occasion. You are doing well Dory! How has this week been for you?

Dexy - Hope your doing fine love. How's that 'A' button coming along 'giggles'

AFM - I'm getting a little ahead of myself... the last few days I have felt like going and buying a test. Then I check my diary and tell myself it's not time yet, just be patient lol. I am only on about day 16 of my cycle of 28-32 days!

I have been feeling better this week, and I am so grateful for feeling better as my mum has been having a tough time and so I have been trying to support her the best I can at the moment.

I got another email this morning from that parenting site. They replied to my last email sending many apologies, saying the problem had been fixed, yet I'm still getting the emails, this one was about "how to babyproof your relationship" I have again emailed them back after getting quite annoyed with them. So we'll see if that helps...

Take care ladies,
Love and Hugs to you all

Danni

Gem - oh sweetie.... you sound like you are in a very strong place at the moment - makes it easy to deal with the unexpected..... like that email. Grrrr, it's not good enough is it? When would you test? I have a mind like a seive......

Jenna - I have missed the pics so will hve to go hunt them out.....

I am doing really well this week. One of the ladies in my belly buddies thread told a story about a relative of theirs having an extremely prem baby who didn't survive and that really took me back to my own experiences and I didn't expect that. It upset me quite a bit. Reminded me that most people just don't really know how to try and help or understand. I wouldn't wish the death of a baby/child at any age on anyone, but that shared experience usually makes it easier to understand. The lady on the thread was asking for advice which is great and of course I gave more than my two cents worth! I was just surprised at how much I was affected and more that I was taken back in an instant to my own gut wrenching anguish. Guess with this grief caper, the motto is, expect the unexpected. DH and I did something pretty special yesterday and today. We collected the cot we'd purchased. Of course I had a cry and was excited, at the same time. And today with the help of the cats, we assembled it. And know what else? Come next week if I go into prem labour, the docs won't try and stop it...... that is just mind blowing. All this time my focus has been on avoiding labour, and it's now very odd to be getting to a stage where labour is actually a desirable outcome. Always the unexpected. Gem - give my love to the DD's and DS.

Hi Ladies,

Dory - Wow you have your bubba's cot, I am so so happy to hear that. I think I had a slight tear forming in my eye, a tear of happiness just for you! Things are moving along for you now Dory and it won't be long now until the big day arrives. I am so excited for you.

Oh Dory, I wish I was feeling as good as I was in my last post. I am very happy at the moment beacause I have just been reading your exciting news, however over the weekend I seem to have picked up on yet another cold that my children have introduced to the house. I must have dodged about 8 of them in recent months but not this one... no, this one got a hold of me and is not letting go at the moment. I have one DD home with me, she is watching a movie in the other room at the moment. She looked horrible yesterday, as though she hadn't had any sleep for days. She was looking better this morning, but I thought I would give her the day to get over it before venturing back out again. It has been really cold here, colder than usual winter temperatures, and its a struggle to get the kids to dress appropriately to keep warm.

I have another 10 days to go before 28 days is up, but it's been swapping between 28-32 days. And it's been in order too, so one month it's 28 days then the next it's 32 then 28 etc, last one was 32 so I should expect 28 days this month... actually what am I talking about, I don't expect AF at all this month ;) I bought a twin pack of tests yesterday. I am waiting very patiently lol

Oh before I forget, if I happen to dissapear for a little while, I have been having heaps of problems with my laptop... it's struggling lately and if I wasn't so happy about your news Dory, my laptop most likely would have started flying lessons this morning lol... so I need to get it in to have it formatted and start again, or buy a new one, which I can't afford at the moment.. In the meantime, I will keep pushing it hard to work, one day at a time lol..

Take care Ladies,
Love and Hugs to you all

Danni

Oh Gem - you are having a bad run with colds and flus. Hopefully a quiet day today helps.... more would be better if you can manage it. Feel better soon. And thanks for the cheer.

Dexy - how re you going? Can you believe it? You must be 29 almost 30 weeks by now ( just guessing at the mo as I can't see your sig). Thinking of you.

Jenna - how are you doing?

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

Fixed! Lol!

Hello gorgeous girls! Great to hear everyone is doing well - Danni, you are the exception with a crappy cold you poor love. Crawl into bed & hide from the world I say :) & I completley sympathise with the 'children dressing appropriatley" Its so frustrating huh?!? Just do it properly the first time & I wouldnt have to bust your chops! Lol, I'm sure DS would walk out the house a complete grubby wreck everyday unless I ride him each morning - But I guess thats not so un normal for an almost 13 yr old. Good luck for your cycle, my fingers are still crossed x

Dory! You are so very very soon to welcome your precious little one! How incredible! all this talk of letting labour progress! Amazing! Oh, and the cot - Far too adorable... I'm sure the stories you have been confronted with latley have been disturbing to say the least & I really do get that. When having a less than plesant history, I think everything cuts just that bit deeper - We mentally prepare for the worst & just hope that the outcome is better..

Jenna - So very wonderful to hear the universe is turning in your favour! Sorry to hear about the bath incident thou, a fright you could have lived without no doubt... I look forward to hearing all the exciting news to come

AFM - 29 weeks / 2 days & 'super pregnant'! Lol
Lots of movement daily, feeling great still - Only a couple of bouts of indigestion in the last 2 weeks, but I have quickly learnt what to steer clear of & how to devour quick ease. DH & DS getting really excited - Such a gorgeous thing to see.
Birth education done - Baby room ready (so pleased with it!) - Possible names chosen & I am well excited!

Love to each of you & yours - See you soon!

Mrs Dex x

Dexy - that is so awesome! It's so cute that your DS is excited. There will be about the same age gap between your DS and bubs and me and my bro. Apparently we were inseparable when I was little and as a youngester I remember idolising him then as a teenager and young adult, he was probably a "bad" but controled influence on me. I know it't not how you hoped it might be.... but I love my big bro and your little one will too.

DEEXXXYYYY... Yay, you got your 'A' fixed hehe... it's nice to see you here, I have missed you :) Your doing really well Dexy, and your big day will arrive very soon too. I seen the most gorgeous little baby boy today, he would not have been any older than a couple of weeks. His mum was bottle feeding him, and he drank all his milk then wanted water... he was so tiny and so sweet and I took in the moment to sit there a couple of seats away and watch him. When his mum sat him up to rub his back he was staring in my direction oh he was so little and so beautiful. A beautiful moment, I felt so priviliged to watch him for a few moments as the last time I was in that shopping centre I was looking at another baby, but the mother didn't like me looking at her baby and moved the tiny girl out of my sight. So this was lovely to see today.

Anyways, I just wanted to come in and acknowledge everyone, I can't stop as I have to get to the bank, I will come back later and catch up some more.

Take care
Danni

Hi Ladies,

How are you all doing? The clock is ticking for you Dory and those plans of allowing Labour to happen, it's getting closer by the minute. I am sooooo looking forward to your wonderful news! I think about you often, and wonder how you are getting on. I also find myself wondering how your cats are doing too. I know you were distressed with one of them being in the vet recently and I hope everything is going well now.

Jenna how are you doing dear? Would love to hear any updates from you!

Dexy... How are things there, how is the family and work?

AFM: I know I said I would come back in the other day and I didn't get around to it, I feel so slack lol. I have had a busy time lately, running around from here to there, feel like there is so much to do, yet so little time. I have also been on an emotional roller coaster lately which is not helping. I caught a cold a couple weeks ago and I am still trying to shake it off. It's one of those colds that just as you think you are getting over it, it takes you down again.

I was in tears the other day after I had a rude plumber here who I had to ask to leave, I have never had to do that before, and even though he probably wasn't that rude, and I would typically dismiss it - it really upset me. I hadn't cried like that for a couple of months and I was left wondering why am I feeling so emotional?

I got most things done yesterday, so I am having some 'me' time today, I am going to spend some time reading, writing and drawing then I am off to lunch with mum. She is going overseas this weekend with her sisters etc and will be away for a couple of weeks. She is really looking forward to it and she so deserves a break from everything, I think she works too hard sometimes, not only at work but for everyone around her, so a nice break from it all will do her the world of good. Wish I could go with her, to get away from this cold weather if nothing else. It has been so cold here, my fingers are freezing while I am trying to type.

AF due today so we'll see what happens. I did a test almost a week ago, I don't know why, it was just a waste really, even if I am UTD it was still very early to be testing...

So thats a quick update from me. I may not always reply, but I check in often to see how everyone is going. So hope your all well!

Take care - Love and hugs to you all

Danni

Gem - I was thinking about you today and once I logged on today I would write a post... and there's one from you. Sorry to hear you're having a hard time of it lately. Big hugs.... I am so proud of you for not tolerating unacceptable behaviour but sorry that it upset you so much. Did it feel good to cry and let it out even if you didn't really understand why? I do know what you mean about a cold you can't quite shake... just when you think you're on the mend, back it comes again. I feel like that too. But I have the luxury of "resting".

Things are going ok. I had a cluster of symptoms that might have indicated pre-eclampsia, but my BP was ok today at my appointment, but the other symptoms are lingering... including a persistent headache... will just keep an eye on it. I am too stubborn to take a headache tablet, as I want to know whether the headache resolves by itself or not.

Glad you caught up with your mum.....mine was here at the same time my BP was elevated....hmmm I wonder, just coincidence? I love my mum, but I find she's not very comfortable when out of her own environment.... when she's visiting she's anxious and can't really sit still, but when she's at her home, she's much more relaxed.. maybe it's just easier for me to sit still while she does her own thing around her house and she's just the same where ever she is? I just enjoy my mum's company more when I visit her rather than the other way around.

The obs said today again, that if labour started now, no steps to halt it would be taken.... I've said it before but that is totally mind blowing. The obs today said twice that he was on call this weekend and even asked me my plans for the weekend and gave his approval for an afternoon tea with a friend who lives locally. Hmm that got me thinking maybe he's suspecting a visit from me over the weekend? Or maybe he was just letting me know he was on to provide some reassurance? I have pretty much everything packed and ready... just things like my filofax, i pod, books and some extra clothes to go in.

It is so good to have the little cats all back together. The one who was away, is very snuggley, and I am loving it. They have all settled down and are getting back to being good brother cats. They have been so important to me the past couple of years, but especially being at home by myself these past months. I think it's the company they give and that they show interest in me... all throughout the day. I can't rely on friends and family filling that gap... it's just too large and too much to expect. So I suppose they have helped me feel like I am not alone and that has probably helped me to avoid depression. Pretty amazing really... not bad for three little cats.

Thanks for asking after me and the cats... I really appreciate it. I think of you a lot too, even if I am not always posting. I am hoping that this is your cycle!

Hiya Dexy..... you must be 30 weeks by now? Hope all is going well.

Jenna - you've been quiet... hope you are just too excited to post.

I hope that AF stays away!

Dory, nice to hear from you. You sound like you may have the cold we have all had, it started out for me as headaches, I had about 3 headaches a day. I hope you are feeling better soon. Maybe the cats cheering you up can help with the symptoms. If you feel happy, you generally feel more healthy, but if your feeling down, colds can take a hold of you more easily, so keep your chin up high and keep thinking positively. You are doing an awesome job. I am so glad that you have the reassurance from your ob, letting you know that he is not far away should you need him. Is your mum getting impatient waiting out these last few weeks or is she generally like that? My sister use to be like that, I say use to, because I don't see her anymore. She hardly ever came over, and when she did she was restless and always seemed to keen to get going soon enough. Glad to hear that your cats are doing fine and giving you lots of attention. It's good having pets around isn't it. It's funny, I sometimes start talking to our dog when it is just the two of us here. She starts looking at me as if I am nuts lol. She is classic. My DD taught her to speak. So when you ask her to speak, she will bark. Or you can give her the hand signal and she knows to speak. She is funny when my DD tries to get her to do it inside, she knows I don't like it when she barks inside and so she will give off a gentle growl instead of a full on bark. It's so cute. She knows how to shake hands and lay down etc...

And yes, even though I was left wondering the other day why I was in tears, I did feel better to get it out. I still felt emotional for the rest of the day, but it was like being able to breathe again, just by having a good cry. I done a test this morning, and it is showing a very faint line but I am not convinced that it is a BFP.. still no AF so I will wait a couple of more days and see what happens. If I have my calculations correct, this is the first cycle in several months which has not followed the pattern of 28,32,28 etc... I am on day 29 of what should be 28 days going by the pattern.

I won't be far away, now that the time is getting closer and closer for you Dory. I am so looking forward to some wonderful news from you, I can hardly wait, although I am willing to wait as long as it takes ;)

Take care, love and hugs to all
Danni

Hi guys! Sorry for not posting, have been stalking and reading though :)

Dory - So exciting! Not long to go now :)

Danni - I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you, though they do say that a line is a line no matter how faint it is! lol I just realised, if you're UTD this month, there'll be approx the same amount of time between our due dates as there is with Dexy & Dory!
With this one, I had 2 very faint lines with Crystal Clear tests, one on 14dpo and the other on 15dpo, then I used FR on 15dpo and got a really really strong line :) My BT results on 15dpo were only 29, so there is a good chance for you :)

Dexy - Thinking of you darl! Hope everything is going well with you!

afm - nothing much happening here, just the dreaded all day sickness that I can't seem to avoid :( Although, vegemite on toast seems to help stop me from throwing up in the mornings.
Other than that, crampy, tired and emotional. Headaches every couple of days, but Panadol seems to ease tham. My back and hips have died lol so I've just been taking it easy on our new couch (my brother was getting rid of his brand new recliner couch set so we put dibs on it and hubby picked it up on the weekend) it's heavenly! I get to lean back and relax with my legs up and the laptop in front of me lol
My mum is also down from QLD this week, so she's staying with us until she heads back next wednesday. It's great having her here, especially since I didn't have her around very much when I was growing up, and she asn't able to get down when I was pregnant with DS until the week that he was due and she had to leave the day I was induced. She's going to be down a lot more often as my grandmother isn't doing too well at the moment and keeps on saying she's not going to make it to christmas. She's been saying that for years, but she's gone down hill so much this year that for the the first time we're taking her seriously.

Anyway, enough of my morbid thoughts.
Hope you're all doing well!

Hi Jen, nice to hear from you. I can't stay for long, just came in my room for a breather from the kids... argh.

Just wondering what FR is? You said you tried the crystal clear tests and then tried something else... mmm interesting, still no AF here. You got me curious now because when I found out I was pregnant with Jayden I used crystal clear and it was very faint then too... Lets hope that we can follow in Dory and Dexy's footsteps ;)

Take care,
Danni

Hi Danni, FR is First Response. I reccomend them above all others, except for the digitals as I haven't ever used them. But I do reccomend trying a First Response test, the piccies I put up on one of the other pages were those, and the pink/purple lines are so clear compared to the blue ones on he crystal clear tests.

I can't wait to hear your good news!!!

Hi Jen, thanks for that, I will keep that in mind. But for now... well AF came along on saturday morning grrr... So the cycle has started again. I don't know what to expect this month 28,32,30... guess if I get to 34 days and still no AF then I can try testing...

Sorry I only posted a quick one on friday. I know what you mean about those headaches, I have been getting heaps of headaches. I think it might be part of the cold that is still lingering or it may be because I have really sore shoulders and neck lately. Hubby has been busy wih massage lately trying to ease my tensed muscles. I'm not sure, but I think it might also be partly from stress and partly from the cold and trying to keep warm by tensing up my shoulders... I too have been feeling quite emotional, I would say it's not normally like me, I guess it's more to the point that I don't usually find myself in situations that make my emotions show like they have been lately.

Just taking each day as it comes at the moment, and speaking of days, yesterday we had awesome weather, it was mostly sunny all day which hasn't been happening much here, so I took the opportunity to get outside into the garden. As hard as it can be to work in the garden, I find it quite nice plodding along in the garden, it's like a meditation in nature, it's lovely listening to the birds chirping, clearly they were lapping up the sunshine too.

I hope that MS gets better for you soon Jen. Enjoy that new lounge suite ;) Hope your Grandma is doing ok, it can be hard for herself and for her family when ill health sets in. If it is her time soon, may she pass on peacefully! I found a quote which I will share with you as it brings comfort to me - 'A death on the Earth plane is a Birthday in the spirit realms.' Death is not the end.

Dory how are you doing?

Dexy hope all is well.

Take care ladies, love and hugs to all
Danni

Gem - feel better soon. I am so sorry that you're still feeling miserable. Pussy cat hugs to you... they always make me feel better.

Jenn - read your blog entry... hope that the m/s disappears.

Only a short one from me today... going to spend some time with DH, seems we've spent little time together today, seeing as lazy bones here slept in.

Hi Ladies,

Just another quick post to see how everyone is going?

Dory you are almost their, how is everything going? I have been trying to keep a close eye on BB for any updates from you. I look forward to your wonderful news of bubs arriving safely... ! Not long to go now!

Dexy how are you getting on? Your 'A' button is fixed and we haven't heard much from you... lol hope all is well with you and bubs.

Jen - time is going by for you too, I didn't check you ticker you must be about 10 weeks? You will be going for another scan soon enough... I look forward to hear how things are going.

AFM Well we had a busy busy weekend, actually it's been very busy last week too. I have only just stopped this morning to take a breath lol... Just going through the washing which had been put to one side, slowly getting through it, and we have beautiful weather again, great for drying. It's amazing isn't it how the house can quickly turn into a mess when we have so many things going on in one week.

I hope you are all doing really well.
Love and hugs to you all,
Danni

Gem - things are going really well... although I was anxious over the weekend so paid a visit to the hossy for some monitoring as hadn't felt bubs move for the best part of more than 15 hours, and not at the usual times. Never had monitoring before, so it was pretty amazing to hear, and to see bubs heartbeat increase when bubs was moving and also during a braxton hicks contraction, in addition to the general relief that there was a heart beat in the first place. DH was so chuffed that he asked for a copy of the print out.

Don't forget I have your email, so I will email you any news long before I get to BB.

Today is Sophie's first anniversary...after today the "year of firsts" will be gone. It's inconceiveable to have time move forward, as time is such an external measure, and I suppose the world at large forgets and moves on, but in a way I don't. I mean I do, but a part of me will always be in that moment.

It seems that you are feeling a bit better? It seems that way. It's good to hear and sense the energy in your post.... its been missing whilst you've been feeling under the weather.

Dexy. Jenna - hello there foxy ladies. Thinking of you.

Dory I noticed a couple of weeks ago that Sophie's anniversary was coming up, I didn't realise when I posted earlier though. Your signature is not working properly at the moment. I hope your getting through the day ok. Stay strong Dory, you are doing a great job. I look forward to receiving an email from you... !!! and yes I have been feeling better, thank you for asking.

On another note, I popped back in today because I wanted to ask some advice about something. I tried the doctor but they are booked out, and tomorrow I have to take my kids into town for an appointment so I'm not sure what time I will get back etc etc... so it's up to you guys to help me for the time being. Today I noticed some thick discharge, actually, a lot of discharge. Some was brownish red colour and some was clear. I don't remember having this happen before, not to this extent anyhow. Does this mean I have an infection? Any ideas? I am 10 days into my cycle and AF finished 7 days ago.

Anything you can suggest would be helpful.

Thank you
Danni

Gem - I know this is even more gross - but are there any other symptoms? Like fever or or redness or itching or odour? I don't know what it could be, but certainly I would have it checked out. I would try and keep a bit of it too and put it in the fridge. I know it's a disgusting concept, but it might help the Dr, esp if you don't get any more of it. If that is too gross ( and make sure the kids know not to open it!) maybe take a photo?

Thanks for your advice Dory, it is a little embarrassing to talk about isn't it lol... :redface: I have had little symptoms, the ocassional itch every now and then. A few little pains here and there. Nothing drastic though. I will try the doctors again tomorrow when I get home and hopefully they are not booked out.

Danni

Gem - it seems that anything related to genitals/bottoms is always embarrassing to talk about... It's not like it's something we talk about all the time but they are so important! In the TTC threads the girls always apologise for too much information when they want to ask about mucous/discharge but happily talk about the BD'ing schedule. The irony makes me laugh sometimes. I can be a prude about both!

Gem - we're back on line! Yay! Can't wait to hear from you.

Dexy & Jenna - hello - no baby action here yet... can you believe I have made it to 39 weeks and that if I go into labour now ( excluding any of the usual emergency issues) I am normal and it's not an emergency? No way... I am looking forward to sharing some good news with you all soon. Take care.

WooHooo... Ladies, can you believe it, I have been busting to come in here since about 10 am yesterday LOL I have tried many many times to log in, but nothing was happening... but here we are, and have I got some news for you...

So yesterday, while I was at the shop, I thought I would buy these tests that Jen was talking about "First Response". I decided to give it a go when I got home, I'm not really sure why because AF wouldn't be due until sometime this weekend or later, depending on the length of cycle it decided on this month lol... {I wanted to post a picture here, but I can't work our how to do it :doh:}

I will have to use this pic instead lol :bfp: :hooray:

I done another test last night and again it was positive, and again this morning, it was positive again.. DH still wasn't convinced and wanted to wait for the blood test b4 celebrating, so I had the blood test this morning and finally got the result about 6pm tonight to confirm :BFP: I don't know the HCG levels at this stage, but I will go back to see the doc hopefully in the next few days to find out those details. Going by my calculations I am 3w3d... We have a ball of cells lol and are due around 28-05-11.

We have been letting family know this evening...

Yay - I finally got to SHOUT IT OUT TO THE WORLD :D So Jen, we were not far out from the difference between Dory and Dexy - Just enough to be different.. :D

Hope everyone is doing well.
Love and Hugs to all

Danni

OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG!!!!!!

YAYYYYYYY! Sooooo happy for you Danni! The best news ever!!!
I was right :) I knew I was lol

Dory - Looking more and more like my dream will be right lol lets hope it's not and you go into labour sometime over the next few days :) And YAY on everything being classed as "normal" now when you do go into labour :) I'm getting so excited I'm bouncing in my seat!

afm - (This will be long lol, lots to catch up on)

12wks 2d today!!! Next milestone is 16wks :)

We still don't have our internet connected. They were supposed to contact us when we'd been approved, but hubby had to ring up last week just to find out whether we had or not, so not happy in that department. I want to know when they're coming around to install everything so I can make sure I have the money ready in my bank account to pay for it all.
So I gave in and bought a bit of pre-paid credit this week.

Other news, I have been feeling little flutters just behind my pelvic bone for 2 weeks now! So excited, but I haven't been entirely sure that it was the bub... thought it was gas at first, but that feels ENTIRELY different lol

Still taking it easy, chowing down on lollies and chocolate every chance I get, and have been craving CocaCola for the past 2 weeks as well lol, I know it's not good for me, but it helps ease the MS soooo much!
Speaking of MS, it seems to be fading a bit, I now have more good days than bad days, and the last 4 mornings I have been waking up feeling pretty good and wide awake for a change lol

I've been busy busy busy trying to get a few bracelets made for some lovely ladies I know who lost their bubs, but it's been freezing cold in my study/workroom (aka the mess hole lol I swear I have no idea how I find anything in there it's so messy) and I haven't been able to spend much time in there, means I'm stuck on the couch being bored the rest of the time.

I had a bit of pink spotting this morning and some AF-type cramping, but it has cleared up now.
I have a scan tomorrow afternoon, as after the scare the other week after the rugby game I called my OB's office and spoke to one of the lovely midwives there who asked me to come in and get a referral for a scan. When I told her about my GP refusing to give me the 12wk scan referral just because I didn't want the bloodtest she told me it was stupid and my GP doesn't know what she's talking about as the 12wk scan isn't just for the NT, but also to measure bubs growth and to make sure that everything is developing normally.
I also got to meet some of the other midwives and had a bit of a chat with them, and they are all so nice and friendly.
It was a really great experience. I get to see them again next week, on the 22nd, as I have to see a midwife and get assessed etc before I see the OB, but they said they'd try to get the OB in for a chat on the day since it is one of the days he will be in.

All in all it's looking like it will be a really good birth experience

Also, planning on heading to the melbourne show with DS and hubby on the 26th, so if anyone else is heading there on that day and wants to catch up we should organise it now

JEEZUS CHRIST!

SOOOOO MUCH HAPPENING IN HERE I MUST UTILISE CAPITAL LETTERS TO DISPLAY MY EXCITEMENT!!! ROTFL!

Gem! Congriddilins you gorgeous thing! How exciting! What a well deserved BFP! I'm just sooooo excited for you & can not wait to hear all the stories to come... Love to you & all of yours for the journey. Eeeeekkkkkk!

Dory - 'Normal' What a bloody word hey! Lol. Hope your taking super good care in your very final days. Thinking of you all the time & can't wait to hear your big news too!

Jen - Look at you! 12w 2d! Take good care of yourself love... 16 weeks is approaching fast!

I just can not believe that each of us has come full circle since the beginning of this thread - It astounds me but I couldnt be more pleased! Its a warming story I will keep very close forever.

AFM - I'm huge, smiling like a giddy kid & just so excited for everyone I could scream!
35w 4d & $50 says I wont go to 40 weeks, just a gut feeling... But all is well.

Is anyone Facebookey? Let me know if you are, I will pm you my email so you can add me! Or send me yours, whatever works... Easier to keep updated on something like that!

Dexy x x x

:D It's wonderful isn't it Dexy, how all of us have come around... For this very short moment each of us is UTD lol Now you don't have to stick it out the 40 weeks if you or baby don't want to :p but I think it is only polite if you hold off until we here that Dory has delivered first :D she is waiting very patiently indeed - and queue jumping is just not fair lol I'm just muckin around... nature will do what nature intends...

Jen hope all is well with you dear and the spotting has resolved...

Dory Whats the Story... where is bubs??? :D

Afm I think I have picked up a chest infection DOH, I have hardly stopped coughing since late last night, my throat and chest is quite sore. I don't want to take anything until I see the doc later this morning. No morning sickness, well a tiny bit nausea at times but nothing drastic, hoping it stays that way. Hopefully the doc will do my bloods and I can find out the HCG levels too, it seems they didn't record that from the last blood test.

Take care Ladies,
Love and Hugs to all,
Danni

Hi guys, just stopping in briefly. Scan went really well.

Bub was measuring at 13wks! Finally it's grown a bit quicker lol must be all those lollies and chocolate I've been eating lol

Heart rate was 150bpm, so 2bpm less than the 9wk scan, but still all good.

AND.............. it's a little wriggler! It was kicking and wriggling and turning around in circles (not that there is much room in there, which made me a bit worried... its it normal for the sac to be slightly flat and jellybean shaped? Also, I could see the edge of the sac in the picture we got... that seems a bit weird to me!

Anyway, I now know that it is defiantely bub that I have been feeling moving, as while I was having the scan I felt some it's more energetic kicks and wriggles while I was watching them on the screen. It was so amazing! It's been wriggling all morning too, especially just after I finished my brekkie of Nutrigrain lol

MS is almost gone - only had 2 days out the last 5 days where I felt a bit queasy in the mornings and that was yesterday and today. Although, I was watching bondi vet last night and they made a dog throw up to get a g-string that it had eaten out of its stomach and it almost amde me hurl watching that.

Hope everyone else is doing well!

Gem - Congratulations - somehow admist my own gloom I missed your BFP post in here. I am so so so so happy for you. AND I love your ticker.... it will be so good to see it move along. Sorry you're feeling off colour - there are certain antibiotics you can have whilst UTD that should help clear that nasty infection. Did you get M/S with DS?

Jenna - that is awesome news about your scan! Well done.... every day is a step closer.... are you showing yet? Did you have MS with your DS? Glad it seems to be subsiding anyway. I can't watch Bondi Vet even though I love animals and wanted to be a vet. I find it just too upsetting. But I seem to be fine with those medical shows like RPA and Emergency etc. Thank goodness our dogs never ate things like that... cause if it doesn't come up they have to operate...all just a bit traumatic for a g string which has no nutritional value!

Dexy - I just love your description of yourself - and finally after a couple of days of being gloomy and weepy with some help from a special friend, I can describe myself like that. You can queue jump if you like, I mean 34 weeks is awesome, but I would like bubs to stay snug for you for at least another 3 weeks til 37 - it's just better all around. At this stage belly rubs are much better than mumma cuddles but after 37, mumma cuddles are the best! I am at the stage of wanting mumma cuddles instead of belly rubs. I honestly never imagines that all of us in here would be UTD at the same time.

AFM - I am a bit happier physically today too - last night about 7pm the braxton hicks came back after mostly stopping when the stitch came out last Thurs. Even though they're still not regular, most of the time they are stonger and it just reassures me. The soreness in my pubic bone is not so bad today thanks to a lot of icing ( what a weird place to ice!) and I have been doing some light exercises. My hands whilst still numb and tingley and feel like big fat sausages but are not hurting as much. The one bummer is that I had a few good chomps on my tongue last night in m sleep, which is now really sore, but I have decided that's a good excuse to have jelly and icecream for desert tonight and I have been hitting it with things that have vitmain C in it or yoghurt - for some reason they make it feel better. So all in all the little gloomy monster seems to have mostly gone away. Phew! I didn't like being that weepy and pathetic all the time.

WooHooo I got into BB.... has anyone else been having trouble getting in here?

Dory - 40 WEEKS :hooray: why does your ticker say 2 days to go? Has labour started for you yet? Time for you to enter the world lil one :D

Jen - I tried to explain to DH tonight while I was in the supermarket that lots of chockies and lollies will make baby bigger... "Just ask Jen" I said. But he didn't believe me lol... hope everything is going well with you and yours.

Dexy - Hope your well.

AFM At 3w6d, by my dates, hcg was 558.2. First blood tests all came back normal. Am having another test for hcg this friday. Been sick with a flu since about thursday, was in bed all weekend feeling sorry for myself lol. DH was slowly loosing patience listening to me complain but put up with it without too much fuss, bless him. What would we do without our DH's. I have an ear infection and am on more antibiotics, but apart from the infections, flu, unsettled belly, sleepless nights, sore throat, sore chest etc etc I feel GREAT... :D... I think I'm slowly coming good. Just hoping that my sneezing stops before I do some damage. I already hurt my back and my ear from sneezing and blowing my nose lol but I'm in good spirits

and waiting very patiently Dory... :D c'mon Dory's bub... !!! "It's Time"

Hope your all well
Love and hugs to you all
Danni

Gem - not sure why my ticker says that. I put in all the right dates, and that is what it came up with. You sound hilarious - being thrilled despite feeling miserable. Keep up the high spirits.

the bigs day is Thurs, unless anything happens sooer. I have come to terms with a caesarean now and am excited to know I am meeting bubs 19 months to the day that I met Ameila. I like the sychronicty of the dates of "23rd". And only 2 sleeps to go. WOOT WOOT.

Quick stop in girls... I'm actually on my iPhone in bed! Lol.
Dory my love and best wishes are with you gorgeous one! How incredible tomorrow is the big day! Can't wait to hear the big news!
Gem great hcg result! How encouraging! Hope your feeling 100% again super soon x
Jen hope your feeling better too and MS had drifted away! Your doin a great job love. The new addition will be here before you know it.
Big day ahead girls so best I get cracking!
Dex x x x