Adoption in Queensland

**ttcbub1** · October 23rd, 2008, 12:50 PM

Hi everyone,

First of all - it is GREAT to see a forum that has a section for adoption .. my usual haunt doens't - and would only consider the possibility of a new section if there was enough interest ..

A bit of history on us ...

DH and I have been doing OI with IUI and IVF for the past 4 years this coming March 09 .. it's been a very long road with NO pregnancy at all

This year has been very hard on us because our 3rd IVF was cancelled in April - due to EST 22,000 and my left ovary missing .. In May I had lap/hyst surgery and discovered that my left tube is completely blocked, no endo - but my left ovary is sitting very high - why ? they have no idea .. so now for IVF i need lap surgery to get to my left ovary ..

I hyperstimulate EVERY damn cycle - so therefore we never get a FRESH transfer - our beautiful babies are always frozen ..

The past few months I"ve been very depressed - cry at the drop of a hat - and am just finding it harder and harder to deal with a BFN cycle after cycle .. I can't even congratulate friends now - and that's not like me at all ..

The past few weeks DH and I have been discussing ADOPTION .. I've looked into it and the EOI (expression of interest) close 31st October 2009 .. Fee: $ 62 (i think) .. assessement fee: $ 500 (under) ..

Is there anyone here in Queensland who are going through the process that could help us ? .. give us an idea of what we'll be heading into .. etc ..

we're still in 2 frames of minds - try IVF one more time - but then that could be wasted time when we could be starting the adoption process ..

If you are going through the process now - I'd love to hear you ..

many thanks in advance ....

**JellyBean** · November 20th, 2008, 04:46 PM

Hi there,

I just noticed you had no reply here and felt compelled to write to you.
Firstly, I'm really sorry to read about your losses. I am not in your boat but my heart goes out to all those who are.
I suppose you have tried the natural medical path too? You are probably sick of reading stuff about conception, but just incase you are interested, you can read my post titled 'Natural Conception Advice' under the general conception area. Apologies in advance as it is quite long- but it contains heaps of info that your doctor has most likely not told you.
Besides all that, I think adoption is an incredibly noble thing to do- and such a gift to a child in need. Its something I have always wanted to do, regardless of whether I could conceive children naturally or not. We are all one big family after all, and giving birth doesn't make us mothers anyway- its the love and care that we give to the little ones that defines a mother.
I'm sorry I can't help you with the adoption info- I just wanted to give you some support in your journey to becoming a mother.
I do hope you become a mother some day soon- one way or another!!

XX

**M7Missy** · November 27th, 2008, 06:02 PM

My advice would be to request the forms and fill them out and have them ready to go - I would try to cycle sooner than later if your going to give it one more shot.

Is there something particular you would like to know......I know a couple of girls and there DH's in QLD doing adoption.

**Berry1** · November 27th, 2008, 08:01 PM

Hi ttcbub1,

I am so sorry to hear about the hard time you have had ttc. I wish I could better answer your questions, but just to say that I know of people in QLD who have adopted from O/S and I know the process can take a while, so definetly worth looking into, also they are really happy with their daughter (from China). Did you end up putting in an EOI?

All the very best to you & DH on your journey to be parents.

Berry

**squidipa** · November 27th, 2008, 08:10 PM

hi there me and hubbie are just starting this process but for different reasons the figure's you have there are the figure's that i understand to be correct please feel free to private message me to chat if you like.

We had to wait till we were married for 2 years so we could fill out the paper work in the back of that booket they send you. They have not yet contacted us so we can do the next step so i have to contact them this week or early next week.

Next step for us is a chat and then doing the expresion of interest so yeah we are just starting this journey and i would be happy to be strating it with some companie if your inetrested. even tho our situation is different its still an adoption all the same

good luck sweet!!

**squidipa** · December 11th, 2008, 08:09 AM

ttcbub1

i was wondering how it was all going?? we sent off the paper in end of book and had a call back interview. They sent us the paperwork for adoption so will do that and post in 60 dollars for that this week. where are u on this adoption journey???
would so love to hear from u

take care

**Sad_hanna** · February 4th, 2009, 03:27 PM

Hi
I am only new to this. I am 20 years old and got the shock of my life yesterday when I found out that I am about 30 weeks pregnant. it is amazing how my simple happy life turned so pear shaped. I now this sounds terrible considering you and your partner are trying your hardest to have a child, But i am having one that I dont want and there is nothing i can do to change that. my partner adn i are looking into adoption throught department of child safety but knowing that the child that i give birth to is going to a loving home is important to me. .
I live on the Gold Coast.
All the best

**HotI** · February 4th, 2009, 04:23 PM

Dear Hanna

You must be having so many emotions and feelings all at once. Take the time you need so you and your partner can work out what you want to do.

In Australia, private adoption is not allowed. (Private adoption is where the birth mother seeks out parents who will raise the baby). Adoption must be done through one of the State organisations.

Sending you strength as you work out what is best for you,

take care,

kate

**ttcbub1** · February 5th, 2009, 06:45 AM

hi sad_hanna,

I am so sorry .. what a hard decision to make .. I must however, I was very interested when I read your post .. BUT I have to remain and clear headed and not go "omg in 8 weeks we could have a baby" .. because as Kate says it's ILLEGAL to do private adoption ..

We would just love to say "yes" well take your precious bubba .. but unfortunately we can't - you have to go through the proper channels which means the baby could be a good couple of months old before he/she is actually found a loving home ..

I am so sad that you have considered giving up your beautiful bubba, but that's your choice and yours alone .. I wish you the best, and hope that either you decide to keep your little bundle or he/she finds a wonderful loving and caring home ..

Best of luck ..

**squidipa** · February 5th, 2009, 07:05 AM

here i am reading this also and going wow what a wonderful joy, my sister has had abortions and its torn my heart apart when i have said to her just give it to me. I can have babies but i dont have good pregnancies and each time its like will this be my last? Will my body hold up till the end.

hanna i dont know about adoptions but maybe u should contact the right ppl and ask for more info as in what ya can? this must be the most overwelming thing you have ever had to deal with. Can your family help?

**Sad_hanna** · February 5th, 2009, 10:11 AM

after writing that i read that private adoption is illegal. i suppose it is all the initial shock of everything. I have been thinking a lot and have spent hours talking to my partner and all morning to my amazing mother and I really think that adoption is the right thing for me.
I would feel so much better knowing that I could give a happy couple that desperately wants a child that gift. I feel like its my calling (might sound silly, but I am at peace with that) However I am worried about getting through the next 2 or 3 months.

the crazy thing about this all is, i am apparently about 30 weeks pregnant and I only have the tiniest of tiny little bumps, its almost like i have eaten to much. I didnt feel any movement until yesterday and even then I dont know if it is just my stomach turning because I doesn't feel like anything. Maybe its all denial, i dont know, but i sure as hell dont feel like I am going to have a baby pretty soon. I am going to the doctor again today, getting all the proper blood tests and hopefully a fast tracked scan so I dont have to wait until tomorrow. I am terrified about the scan, i dont want to know anything about it.

Thank you all for caring so much. Reading this blog has made things make more sense.

**ttcbub1** · February 5th, 2009, 10:18 AM

Oh Hanna,

you poor poor darling .. i can't begin to imagine what your going through ..

My cousin didn't find out she was pregnant until like you only had a matter of weeks to go - it was the shortest pregnancy in history in our family .. lol ..

I am glad your mum has been there to talk to you and also your partner .. I wished I could give you a big big hug .. Iam sure there would be plenty of people who would want to adopt your beautiful baby - but it's not as easy as saying "I'd like you to adopt my baby" .. it's a crazy crazy world we live in ...

I hope the scan and everything goes well for you, and try not to stress to much over it .. who know's when you see your little bubba you might have a different train of thought ..

I truely wish you all the best ....

**christy** · February 5th, 2009, 10:53 AM

As mentioned before, private adoption is illegal in Australia. On BellyBelly we do not condone or encourage private adoption due to the high risk associated with it.

**ttcbub1** · February 5th, 2009, 10:58 AM

christy,

I think hanna realises that, after all she did say that after doing some reading she found out it was "illegal" ..

Hanna - I would read some other threads in here sweetie and join them and talk to other people .. you need support atm and this sure is the place to get it !

**sushee** · February 5th, 2009, 02:38 PM

ttcbub1

The purple post was simply a reminder to everyone participating in this forum, or who wishes to participate from now on, that seeking private adoption is illegal in Australia. As you will see, some of Hanna's original post was edited to ensure that it complied with the law, as well as the guidelines of this forum.

**tamato94** · February 8th, 2009, 06:25 PM

Hi Hannah

I am 24 live on the Gold Coast too...Just wanted to say how amazing I think you are for what you are doing! What an incredible blessing you are giving a family...

I just wanted to say if you wanted any support or anyone to talk too pls feel free to contact me as I am around your area!

Tamara

I don't know how the private messages work on here but my email is tam_94@hotmail.com...

**sjs** · February 10th, 2009, 12:28 PM

Hi Hanna, we are looking to adopt a child on the Gold Coast. We live in Worongary.

It is illegal to seek private adoption in Australia but according to the Department of Community Services Queensland, the birthmother can choose the adoptive parents provided both parties go through the adoptive process and are approved by the Department of Community Services.

My email is susans@winshop.com.au if you want to know more about this process.