Permanent Care.......

[lil_chookie]

NSW & VIc are different, their Permanent Care sounds more like long term fostering. But I am surprised at the restrictions placed on them when the little one is placed in their care permanently. Especially your BIL not being able to bath him......that breaks my heart. One of the hardest parts of going through this process (after you have accepted you will not have a baby of your own) is to be viewed as someone who will hurt a child........and to them have that continue after you have been assessed and approved......hard stuff.

It took us about 3 months to be assessed and approved as foster parents, this process we are going through now is different. It's a longer & more intense process. But at the end of it, we will be a mum & dad (and called that if that is what the child wants). I will add a link in here that explains all kinds of questions about Permanent Care for anyone that is interested (hope it is okay to post the link, I haven't been on here lately so I am not up with the rules!):


Permanent care: Adoption and Permanent Care

The first 2 years DHS will have to give approval for anything that a Guardian would, but after the Permanent Care order is passed, it will be us.

[Liviam]

I just had to pop and share. I've just seen the very first photo of my sister, BIL and their little man . They look so incredibly happy plus I'm an aunty again!!!!! I've got tears flooding everywhere, LOL!!

I honestly didn't realise how involve and indepth this process is for couples going through it. You must be so incredbly strong as I don't think I could go through it. You are amazing! I'm off to check out the website you posted.

[lil_chookie]

Dan - I feel soooo happy for your sister! What a great great great day for her & your BIL. And congratualtions on being an Aunty again

I guess you do have to be strong to get through this process, knowing that you are going to give a little person something in life that everyone deserves but they just have not had, a family is a driving force........but I also think Infertility & Long Term IVF disappointment helps you learn ALOT about yourself & gives you strength that you need to get there.

[mrscricket]

Lil Chookie - just wanted to say congratulations on your brave step of entering the world of PC! I truly hope you get your little man because you sound like you'd be a wonderful influence on his life. My parents currently have 3 children in their permanent care and they call them mum & dad, and also have our surname as well. It's great to hear of someone young wanting to take on children - my parents are in their 60's (although you'd never know, they are 'young oldies' ).
Congratulations to your sister Dan!

[dusty]

I guess you do have to be strong to get through this process, knowing that you are going to give a little person something in life that everyone deserves but they just have not had, a family is a driving force........but I also think Infertility & Long Term IVF disappointment helps you learn ALOT about yourself & gives you strength that you need to get there.

You are a wise woman hun and are going to be an amazing mum. I also think relationships that survive the infertility rollercoaster bode well for PC and adoption.

Dan, thanks for sharing your family's news! How exciting.

LC I hope that this thread becomes a more permanent discussion about PC in Australia.

As I understand it currently VIC and ACT have a similar approach to ensuring that children removed from their families are not kept in uncertain limbo for more than 2 years and that they must be placed permanently if they are not able to return to their families. I think, but hopefully someone can tell us, NSW is planning to move to this system soon.

Many people get confused between fostering and PC but PC is much more closely aligned with adoption, as children and families enter into what is hoped to be a life long relationship.

MrsCricket, that is such a heartening story about your parents hun. Thanks for sharing.

[lil_chookie]

Got through nearly half of the questions for my life story over the weekend........13 pages in already. There isn't much they don't want to know, I almost have to remember what I had breakfast on October 3rd when I was 3 years old! LOL. 13 pages seems like a lot so far, but I find myself wondering if the 20 pages I think it will end up being is enough?

[dusty]

I wrote in here a couple of days ago, but it has disappeared

Great to hear how it is going LC. I have a family member in A&PC and she reckons the life story is such a fantastic part of the process. It will be wonderful to have your story to tell your child one day. A special story you wrote just for them. Did you know that the children also have a life story that the social workers write for them that comes with them when they are put into PC? It is a very important part of them from what I understand.

[Liviam]

Oh I thought you were being funny Lil-chookie about them wanting to know your life story. Now I understand, gee I'm slow some days. What a fantastic idea writing the story of how they came into your life. Such an amazing momento just for them. Is it also kinda a debrief for youa nd DH too?
If we have a baby up for adoption in the nursery at work we take photos of everything and write in a journal every shift for the adoptive parents to have so they can see all the firsts. We even do a mock set up of them being weighed and measured.