We may be getting a little girl.....

[Jennifer13]

All the best for the outcome of the assessment. Sounds like you're putting in a lot of effort.

Fostering really is a long and challenging journey. My Mum has done it for about 15 years. The parents and families of foster children are an added challenge that you don't always anticipate. But I know Mum found heaps of support through other carers. Watching her, I'd suggest that if you do get a child, make sure to organise respite care for yourself. Fostering seems more challenging than parenting your own biological children (and my Mum agrees) so making sure you can have a regular break to take care of yourself and your marriage is a good idea.

I know lots of stories where the children are happy with their foster parents and are with them for their entire childhood, identifying them as Mum and Dad. My Mum is permanent guardian for her foster daughter. But there are just as many stories of heartache. My cousin and her DH who do not have children of their own fostered a little boy for over a year, only to have him unexpectedly go back to his bio Mum. It broke their hearts and they haven't been able to take in any other children since. Some kids go to and fro between their bio family and foster carers and more damage is done to the child in the. Interim.

Such a worthwhile thing for you and your DH to want to do and I wish you all the best. Please go into it with your eyes open! And while you're understandably excited, make sure you prepare for it to be challenging as well.


(I don't know how to say this without sounding unsupportive, so please understand I'm not down on your enthusiasm. However, I am of the belief that a child does not have a job and fixing things is for adults. You have love to give and there are children who need this. To need something in return from a child is flawed. And doomed to disappointment!)