hun. What a really tough place you are ing

I think you're next step is to go and have the talk. You don't have to agree to anything, but having some more information might help. I would be very reluctant to medicate myself, but I wouldn't rule it out either. A good friend has a child who is on ADD meds and this is really the only way that he can get through a day at school. Sometimes when neither choice is attractive, you consider something you wouldn't have otherwise.

I think investigating diet is a great idea for something else you can try first if you are able. It is time intensive, especially at first, and it can take time to work out which foods have been an issue so that you don't have to be more restrictive than necessary. I know my DS reacts to sugar and preservatives - I can see the difference in his behaviour and concentration after he eats them. He is very similar to your DS - high IQ, some ASD traits, some ADD traits, low muscle tone and sensory things going on. I think food sensitivities go hand in hand with all of that.

I wish you all the best hun, and would like to hear how you go. It's good to hear from you although not good to hear that things are still really difficult.