Lu hon maz thinks you need some intervention babe. Agression can be a way of communication.

eg

Melting down, sreaming, hitting at dp cause he's picking him up in my eyes euals..dame it dad Im not ready to go home yet im having to much fun.

Maybe try the whole counting until you listen thing (was taught this by the OT). If he starts going off...say im only warning you 3 times and then I wont talk to you because you are hurting me. then when he does it the second time say '2" then the third time say '3' and then ignore him...no matter how much it hurts ect. after 5 mins if he is still doing it, use a hard voice and say THAT IS ENOUGH. Keep the wording to a minimal cause there is nothing worse then to much veral at a melt down situation. Be strong and stick to it...it bloody works hon. I use my fingers when I do the counting thing, 1 finger for 1, 2 for 2 ect. That way if they start up in public I just look at them and do the one finger without a word....pull's Wilhelm up big time.

I was taught this by the OT and we think it works because

Less verbal to comprehend in their brain
Counting and knowing the outcome help as its a type ot routine
telling them your feelings helps promote recognision to the pain he is causing
knowing the outcome of no verbal or eye contact if he doesnt listen

Just re-reading over what your posted hon......it clear that he is very frustrated in himself and is lashing out......what are his habits? do you have a 'cave' for him to retreat into for some him time?