OK we've had a crap o day and I need to have a whinge :-(
Nanna's gone home to brissie (after staying with us for 4wks), school is gearing up for transition to yr 1 and I ran out of soymilk and food in general (been called into work a lot and didnt get the shopping done) so we are out of routine, off our diet and out of this world. Yesterday's christmas party didn't help - It was lovely btw. but complete sensory overload plus he was asked to pick two present from a pile in front of him (and of course changed his mind once we left)
The biggest kick in the teeth was this rude woman today. I was in the video shop at the counter and DS was outside the shop in the trolley playing on his laptop. I had told him where I was going and he was all of a metre away from me through clear glass doors. This lady barges into the store and say, excuse me is this your son he is screaming out here looking for you. I swear to God if looks could kill she would be dead. He of course wasn't screaming or particularly looking for me just making a racket because he hates the shops and was repeating himself over and over again at the top of his lungs. Grrr, do people honestly think a parent in this circumstance needs the point rubbed in their face, did she honestly think I couldn't hear him????
Anyway we have food now and are back on our diet, we have jumped, rolled, had a few wrestles, snuggled under our comfort blanket but he was still throwing himself into the walls before bed tonight. Sometimes I just want to line the inside of my house with mattresses. School tomorrow is going to be so much fun as I am working again so routine is out the window.
Ahh thank you for letting me have my little rant. back to the grind stone. Hope everyone else is doing well
AHHHH honey....sarah - you know what you should have said to the woman.....
of course my son is screaming....he was looking at YOU!!!!
I have so learnt to be a ***** back...I am so sick to death of having people make me annalyse and explain why my child is behaving the way he is...stuff them...if their going to say stupid comments then im going to give them stupid relies! I think that you can only put up with the stupid snide remarks for so long then flip. I actually had a really nice bloke years ago in the supermarket. WIlhelm was being ferral and this guy tried to touch him to help (wilhelm use to scream and hit himself in the head when this happened)..I just said im sorry he's autistic and the guy said he understood, apologised gave ME a hug. I coudlnt beleive it...someone who actually cared enough to think of me.
OH for the looking thing...I use to hold Wihlem's arms and get down to his level....it drove me insane with frustration...I now do my Kath & Kim thase..
Look at moi WIlhelm...WIlhelm....WWWILLLHELM....looking at Moi
Yes I use the stupid tones and the ups and downs of my voice get his attention...he ends up cracking up laughing and guess what...he does look at me
off to make tea so he doesnt eat it again :rolling eyes:
Hi Lovely ladies. I just found this thread and felt the need to post my experience with Aspergers.
Well, my DH has it. When he was young he had to have speech therapy and physiotherapy amongst other things and the paed told his mother that he was "slightly autistic"(paeds words). But his parents didn't want to believe it. He found it tough making friends when he was growing up and was not very good with his schoolwork. (unless it was something he had a partuicular interest in then he was brilliant)
His Aspergers certainly isn't extreme, but as a wife, the challenges are certainly present. I have had to explain his sometimes rude behaviour to my parents. He is very rigid with routine. And with things like DD's toys etc, they have to all be put away in certain ways and certain places.
Emotionally, he is basically of zero support for me. He just doesn't understand how I feel or have the ability to empathise. I find this the hardest because I cannot rely on him for any emotional support and this was particularly tough when I was diagnosed with PND as he didn't understand and didn't agree with me being on Meds even though they completely saved my sanity. Also with DD, if she is noticeably upset he doesn't really think to console her until I tell him to pick her up and give her a cuddle. So that is hard as well.
You have to be careful what you say to DH as everything you say is taken literally, even when it is obvious to you and I that it isn't meant to be taken that way. He constantly needs re-assurance and I find myself being loaded up with all of his worries.
I think the most important thing is understanding and reminding myself of the reasons why he does things the way he does. That said though, he is aware that some of his actions aren't acceptable and that he needs to try to work on these.
He constantly worries that our DD has Aspergers too but so far she seems to be okay. She has good co-ordination skills, she does acknowledge us and point at things and all of that but it is in the back of my mind and I do worry a little whether our next child will have it. I guess time will tell.
To all of you lovely ladies facing this challenge. Big to you.
Oh no, I'm at work and I'm all teary now
Christy - thanks we can all feel 'normal' together :-)
Maz - you crack me up! I think I responded with a "he's fine" and turned my back on her - I was so over it by then. The little man is getting it back together today and school went well apparently. He got his pokemon book from Bookclub so has been engrossed in that all day and is currently curled up in bed with it.
Spice - thank you for your different perspective and can I say from a mother with a child with aspergers - thank you for loving your partner!!!! It gives me so much hope that DS will find a lovely (and patient) lady and enjoy having a family of his own - if he wants too.
Literal sayings - DS put the fan on tonight and I asked him to turn it down so I didn't get blown away and promptly got a lecture on gravity and how that is physically impossible due the force of gravity on our bodies however if we were in space............ such a cutie.
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