I think the best thing to say to grumpy doctors is - "so what do we do now?".

There may also be an element of wanting to be very sure that you will follow through with post-op care, even if it is arduous and sometimes distressing for Axel - so "how you parent" does matter a bit here, in the sense that for surgery to be effective you may need to sometimes be tougher than you would like to be with your son.

All the best. Being grumpy is I think almost a requirement for orthopaedic surgeons - don't lose your cool.