Welcome to Holland

[katanya]

I was orginally given this story by my work at training,(I work with children with disabilities) but recently with all the issues I have expereinced with Felix health I re-read it and found I could relate to it on a whole diffrent way..it's very beautifully written..

"Welcome to Holland"
by Emily Pearl Kingsley


"I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability. To try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this:

When you are going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip to Italy. You buy a bunch of guidebooks and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum, Michelangelo, David, gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The flight attendant comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"HOLLAND?!" you ask. "What do you mean Holland? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I have dreamed of going to Italy."

There has been a change in the flight plan. They have landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine, and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guidebooks. Learn a whole new language. You will meet a whole new group of people you would never otherwise have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. However, after you have been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills, Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandt.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy, and they are all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say, "Yes, that is where I was supposed to go, that is what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever go away because the loss of that dream is a very significant loss.

However, if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, You may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things about Holland.

[nellbe]

I love that Katanya, so beautiful and so true.

[iris]

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine, and disease. It's just a different place.

This is my favourite part. It explains exactly how I feel.

[katanya]

I like that bit too Lara, I also love this bit..

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. However, after you have been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills, Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandt.

[MistyFying]

I agree. This is absolutely spot on. THanks for sharing it Katanya.

[mitch4now]

I too think that is just a wonderful story and it is so close to the way it really is. Thanks for sharing that katanya!
Cheers Michelle

[special child]

i have heard this so many times and every time i read it it still makes me cry,

Samual is doing really well, and I can not wait to concieve again to be able tell him he is going to be a big brother, even if it means i go to Holland again.


Nola, mother of Special needs child Samual now 5 y/o.

[sunnymel]

what a beautifully worded piece! i can now kind of understand the feeling of loss when you have a sick child

[Phteven]

we've got quite a few new members since this was on the front page and since its quite special I thought I'd give it a bump

[hannanat]

I saw this on an Autism site and it made me cry then too.

Thanks Chloe, its beautiful.

[MistyFying]

Shannon - your original post mentioned you weren't "looking at the windmills" just yet. Do you feel you're any closer a year down the track?

[LouLou7]

Hmmm, a counsellor gave this to me a few weeks ago and it really touched me. I have given it to a few friends when I have told them about my baby girls syndrome.

I'm looking forward to the day I am happy to be in Holland. I guess it is a long journey...

[donna_wool]

hi katanya

The Holland story brought tears to my eyes - something I rarely do, and only very few films make me emotional. Thankyou - I read it while holding my baby in my arms. It made my day.

[Baby~amore`]

LouLou I too am wondering how you have been and Lily ... please drop us a note to say how you are going.

Yes , I have read this before ... it is touching.

[loopylulu]

LouLou I too am wondering how you have been and Lily ... please drop us a note to say how you are going.

Hi, I am Loulou (couldn't remember my login name so registered again as loopylulu).

We are doing okay. Some days are better than others TBH. I am tying to be brave at the moment and "suck it up" (my new mantra) as I was finding it too easy to lay in bed bawling Easy but extremely unproductive.

Lily is good. She is starting to sit on her own a little and eating solids and she will crawl at hydrotherapy in the pool so knows what to do, just needs to strength to do it. She is very smiley and lovable. She came off the ng tube very quickly and came off oxygen in March.

I have noticed that not many people name the syndrome/condition their child has. Is that out of privacy/fear of being judged/something else? Lily has a syndrome that has been getting a lot of bad media (you know the story, if they are going to show someone with a conditon on tv it has to be the worst case sceanrio and sensationalised) so I am not that keen to name it just yet.

Thanks for thinking of us Am enjoying getting back into the forum

[sal1969thomas]

Hi mY name is sally and my 2 children have Currarino Syndrome. I am looking for someone in Australia that also has this condition to see what treatment they might be recieving and where. Cheers sally

[mgsea]

I just want to say how much I admire your courage Shannon, for sharing with us about your precious little child. My daughter has Downs Syndrome, which was discovered at birth. She had persistent pulmonary hypertension and was taken to the public hospital ICU within hours of her birth. I remember being in denial, and in emotional turmoil as I watched her clinging to life. She did pull through, and slowly the drips, tubes and ventilator were removed. Yet I wondered what the future would hold with her development; would she be able to go to a normal school?

She is now 13 months old, and attends the downs syndrome early intervention program and is seen by a physio and speech pathologist. I know that she will develop special friendships with her little friends in the early intervention program.

[MistyFying]

Hi mgsea and welcome to BellyBelly. I hope you'll find support and great info here in this community