This is an interesting thread. I am married and Ichanged my name - only because my family of origin was a train wreck and I had no affinity with that name.

However, I also disagree that children should have their fathers name by default... I actually have a number of friends that whilst legally married have kept their birth names. The children have their mothers surname. If I didn't have such horrible connections with my birth ame I would have done the same!

I dont' think patriarchy has a place in our society - it is an old fashioned "quaint" idea - and whilst I agree that it is nice and tidy for all family members to have the same name - it should be something that is considered and thought about.

I realise the OP is pondering it and not for any patriarchal reasons - but generally in society I believe it's just assumed that a child will have the fathers surname. I suggest maybe it needs a rethink!

One of my closest girlfriends husband changed his name to her name when they married - for like me had no attatchement that was positive to his birth name!