Would you do this?

[Mrs P]

DD is 7 months old and has a reasonably unusual name - we know no-one else with this name at all.

DH's cousin just had her 3rd girl and named it something very common that rhymes with DD's name and is essentially spelt almost the same except for the first letter and an extra letter thrown in.

I don't want to post the actual names, but imagine something like Candi and Mandy, or Jessah and Tessa, Kay and Faye... you get the idea.

Anyway, while it doesn't really bother me that she picked a name that is so similar to DD's, I do think that if I was in that position e.g. she had her baby first, I wouldn't do that, IYKWIM. I know they are only going to be 2nd cousins, and not likely to see each other a lot, but for some reason I wouldn't pick something so similar. Especially as it's her 3rd daughter (so unlikely this is a name she's loved 'forever' and been dying to use etc). Maybe this means deep down it does actually bother me? Perhaps I should be flattered that she picked something so similar...

Has this happened to anyone else? I am being unreasonable in, perhaps, being a wee bit bothered? I guess I am just putting my thoughts out here because it's helping me to process how I really feel!

[tellytubby]

Honestly, I think its not a big deal.. Its not the same name, just rhymes.
You said yourself that they won't see each other a lot??
If however it was the same name, then I would think that to be unusual.

My friends LO's name is Ashleigh. Her sister named her LO, Isleig h. I've talked to her openly about it, and she doesn't have a problem with it, and they see eachother every second day.

Maybe if I knew the names you were talking about? Could you space between letters to avoid it coming up in a search?

[Astrolady]

I wouldn't intentionally do it myself, but I have had it done to me. My cousin called their son Lachlan James, when they already knew we had a Lachlan James.

[Mrs P]

Ok the names with a space inserted are (drum roll, ha ha)...

L iana (our DD)

and

D iahna (pronouced to rhyme exactly with DD's name).


Astrolady - did that annoy you?
TT - yeah I know, it really isn't such a big deal, especially as they won't see each other much. I think I just need to get over my surprise I guess!!

[tellytubby]

Well you can sleep peacefully knowing your daughter has the nicer name hehehe

As much as I say no.. Deep down it may annoy me a little.

My son's name is T h e o, and a friend of ours (who we see easily twice a week) has told me that T h e o is at the top of their name list too (little boy due next week).

If they do, I'll be joining you on this vent. Come on, its the same name, and we see each other quite a bit!

[Party-of-five]

I personaly wouldn't do it but my brother named his DS the same name as our cousin named her DS

[~MummaBear~]

we had Picked our boys name ( X avier) out the week that we found out he was a boy (20 weeks Pregnant) we were happy with it and had told the kids and my mum and a handful of other people and then my cousin had a little boy 2 months later and called him (X avier) we thought about it for a while but it seemed wrong for us to change his name so we kept it the same..
I dont see her very often i have never even met her kiddies so its not like there would be 2 of them in the same room
just a bit of a view from the "other" side of the fence!!

[melbel]

It may not have been intentional, maybe they had the names picked out already and it just a coincidence at the end of the day. i know hoe frustrating it was for me over so many years of TTC to have both my boy's name and girl's name snaffled by other family members who got pregnant first......in the end after I had spent ages picking new names I could love I said stuff it, anyone else uses them too bad....I am having it too if it happens! LOL!

[Pandora]

It wouldn't bother me that they rhymed, the same name might. But we have lots of that in our family. 3 michaels, a Michelle and a mykaelah for example.
I wanted to name ds1 the same name as one of my cousins but DH doesn't like the idea of repeating the name.

Li ana is a gorgeous name by the way . It was on my girls list at one stage, i know two very cute little girls by that name.

[toomanyshoes]

I use to get in a huff over names but it really doesn't bother me now. They might have had that name picked out for sometime, maybe before you even named your child, or maybe it holds some special meaning for them.

People will more than likely at some point in their lives run into someone with the same name, or something pretty similar.

I don't think it takes anything away from your DD's name.

IMHO I think we spend too much time stressing over names. It's great you want your child to have a unique name but at what cost? What lengths are you willing to go to? And really, so what if someone has the same name, it is just a name. It wont define who they are.

[Feijoa Mum]

My half brother is called Aiden and boy did we cope it when we called our DS3 Ardyn!

I think they are totally different and maybe your DHs cousin thinks the same about your girls names?

[ShootingStar]

Yeh i dont think its that big of a deal, well to me. Just a thought.. maybe they had trouble agreeing on a name and that was the only one they could? DH and i found that with DD2's middle name.. it was the only name we could both agree on.. its not the same as anyone's we know but if that be the case, it would just have to be the way it is unfort.

[Rowellen]

Yep.

My DS is H ayden. I have cousins who had already have kids before I was pg who have a J aidyn & an A iden & a D aymen. But then I have about 30 first cousins most of whom have had kids or are of childbearing age. There are a few double ups and quite a few of my favourite names have been "taken". As PP's have said, DH & I have found it very difficult to agree on names so even if the name we pick was exactly the same as one of my cousins kids, I would still use it.

[Arimeh]

I don't really get the fuss about names, unless the name was completely made up by you, there is always going to be other kids with the name. Plus, it only rhymes, it's not the same name. Oh and they won't be second cousins, the kid is second cousin to your DH not your child (as confusing as that is for me to understand it but it's apparently true!)

I say stress less

[smiles4u]

Nah if it was me wouldnt bother me in the slightest seeing its a distant relo and therefore she probably didnt think much into it either !

I think its nice

[Baking#4]

I wouldn't do it.

[helle]

we had Picked our boys name ( X avier) out the week that we found out he was a boy (20 weeks Pregnant) we were happy with it and had told the kids and my mum and a handful of other people and then my cousin had a little boy 2 months later and called him (X avier) we thought about it for a while but it seemed wrong for us to change his name so we kept it the same..
I dont see her very often i have never even met her kiddies so its not like there would be 2 of them in the same room
just a bit of a view from the "other" side of the fence!!

I was about to pinch that story haha!

Also, the d name isn't all the unusual. I know 2. Its quite an older name tho (well the people I know who have it are mid twenties) I think.
I wouldn't worry, personally.

[StrawberryFields]

It might be a little that you're a bit P.O'd, because it is annoying when something like that happens, particularly when its not like you were both pg at the same time! But at least it wasn't the same name, and hopefully if they do ever end up in the same room together they will get along like a house on fire and it will become a cute little family funny!

My sister had her son last year and called him J a c k, after I'd told her (before they were pg or even married) that if I ever had a daughter I would call her C l a i r e and a boy would be J a c k s o n. Now I feel that I can't call one of our babies that if they are boys because it will be too similar. I'd even told her that I liked that name because it reminded me of my friend in primary school who was very ill with a heart condition and eventually passed before he even got through school, and I wanted to honour his memory. Her DS is also DS2, so she had her chance before - 8 years before when she had DS1. She is a lot older than me (10 years) so I always knew she would have kids first, but thats exactly why I told her so something like that wouldn't happen. But according to our older sister who I talked to about it, she kind of resents me for petty things - I'm thinner, I'm smarter (so she thinks), I got married younger, I'm more athletic etc etc - things that are out of my control or didn't do to rub in her face like she thinks I did. So we will keep J ackson as a middle name if we have boys, but it is annoying and a little hurtful.