thread: Baby number two, give it to me straight....

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  1. #1
    Registered User

    May 2005
    Canberra
    3,617

    It can be very hard at times, BUT it can also be very rewarding, and It does get easier.

  2. #2
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber & MPM

    Feb 2007
    Melbourne
    5,462

    I found two children pretty cruisy once we got a good routine happening. It definitely wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, but maybe I just got lucky? I have a three year gap between my first two which was great, DS1 was toilet trained and pretty independent by then. I didn't find it difficult to visit people or pop into the shops or post office with two, THREE is a different story LOL!

    The only issue we had was that DS1 took a while to adjust to no longer being an only child which I guess is normal. He was quite naughty for a while because he was trying to gain attention, but he eventually calmed down.

    Good luck deciding

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Feb 2006
    NSW Central Coast
    5,301

    For us, our gap was 16months, DS was not planned and was (a very beautiful) surprise. It was REALLY hard in the beginning for me. We live in a 3rd storey unit, with stairs. I didn't go out alone for months. I found it really difficult. I still do some days. If they are both in bad moods, doing things like cooking and cleaning is all but impossible. It is definately easier now DS is 1. He can play more with DD and they absolutely adore each other. Most days I love it now, but the early days were a bit of a blur until about 5months in. But that's for me. I don't think I have a very high tolerance for adversity or challenge, lol!

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Oct 2007
    Brissy
    2,208

    My two are 21 mths apart, and TBH it took me about 9 mths to really feel like I knew what I was doing! Its really hard - we TT DD1 as soon as she turned 2 - and that was hard work!
    It is easier now, and they just adore each other which is lovely! But - I don't really feel like I'm an active member of society we stay home a bit!
    HTH

  5. #5
    Registered User

    Dec 2007
    Sunny Qld
    14,682

    Can't be that bad if I'm already preggers with #3

    It is hard, but any age would be hard as they all represent their own challenges. I think #3 for me is going to be the hard one, Miss M is going through an extreme clingy stage at the moment and only wants me, and DS is acting up a lot because... well.. because he's a 2 year old.. LOL

    For the most part it is hard and I absolutely collapse into bed at the end of the day and LOVE it when they are both asleep at night (well until they both wake up during the night still), but they do play pretty well together, and I love hearing them giggle together

    ETA - forgot to mention, going to the shops and everything is pretty good now - DS will walk on his own, he wouldn't do that when Miss M was a newborn so I would have to carry both of them at once to get into the shops - that was hard. So we stayed in a lot. Now its easier because he walks everywhere and rarely wants to be picked up. I'd go out more if I had a car!!!!

  6. #6
    Registered User

    Dec 2007
    1,794

    I have 21 months between mine, and DS is 3 weeks old.

    At the moment, it is so hard. DD is acting up cause she doesn't have my 100% attention. I had a ceaser and can't do a lot that I want to, and I am sick with a bad cold. (and DH went back to work this week)..

    There have been a few moments when I have thought, this is ok (and yes they were awake ) and I am sure it will be when I am not sick anymore.

    As DD was such a good baby/child, I had a false sense of optimism that it would always be good and easy..

    But I wanted them reasonably close in age when it was decided that I wasn't going back to work for a while..

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Jul 2007
    melb
    8,498

    My 2 will be 18 months apart!!!!


    AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

    hope i survive ok, may end up sitting in corner rocking back and forward!!!!

  8. #8
    Registered User

    Oct 2007
    Sunshine Coast
    746

    At first, yeah it is hard. But I found that getting toward the end of my pregnancy with DD I was so tired that DS and I didn't go out as much anyway because I just didn't have the energy so he kind of got used to being housebound a bit more.

    I'd say that once DD was about 3 months or so I felt more confident going out with the 2 of them but even then it was a big undertaking that I would start planning the night before, very hard to be spur of the moment.

    I also missed having one-on-one baby time because DS was awake all the time so I never was alone with just DD.

    On the upside though, you've done the baby thing before so it's very much second nature with the new baby, you spend far less time stressing over things and in fact I wondered what on earth I did all day when it was just me and DS as a newborn.

    Now DD is 10 months old and she and DS are starting to play together a bit and she is mobile so more fun for DS - he pretty much ignored her when she was tiny because she didn't DO anything. But now she does get into his toys so I have to keep an eye and ear open...sometimes he doesn't mind her playing with his cars, other times she gets pushed around and I have to intervene and there are tears all around.

    I am also back at the point where I can do 2 outings a day, just like I was with DS, and juggling the two of them is second nature.

    I will admit DD has been a dream baby though, happy to sit in the pram, easy to settle and slept through the night from 3 months (in other words the complete opposite of DS who still wakes up in the night now).

    But now I'm pregnant with Number 3! And there will be only 18 months between DD and this one so I'm going to have to re-learn all this again!!!

  9. #9
    BellyBelly Member

    Jul 2006
    1,069

    We have 19 months between my two. It is tiring, and cooking and cleaning often takes a back seat to the kids (ok always takes a back seat!! ) ..but you want my honest opinion?!!...I love it! but I really think it depends on the personality types of your kids.

    When our second came along, there was heaps of new challenges. But I used a sling (put them on the boob in the sling and you are pretty much free! ) and that was terrific.

    I think at the moment (with a 2.5 year old and 9 month old) meal times are the biggest struggle, just because they get very busy, and yes my house is often a mess..but my kids are happy, secure and love each other to bits- which is what matters most to me!

    All the best!