You make perfect sense OP

My #1 & #2 are 14mths apart.

I don't think I really done any preparing for when #2 came along. DS & I were always together, so every aspect of the new babe coming he was with me. So shopping for things I needed, going through newborn things etc. I always talked to him about what I was doing, and how we used them [like bottles, baby blankets].

And we always treated the 'babies' [dolls] in the house gentle. I think actually that is something I actually reinforced with everything was "gentle". But that wasn't because a new babe was coming, that was because we owned a dog!!

Baby gates are another thing that were a blessing! I think a must have for any new Mum who has a toddler when they have another babe. I had one on both kitchen doors, the front door and bathroom door. The only places he could go were the bedrooms. If he was having a particularly feral day I would put the gates up on both the loungeroom doors to keep him in there with me while feeding the babe.

And yes he was like your LO and still being fed by me. He was until he was about 18mths because his motor skills weren't great and his frustration was in overdrive. I felt having the new babe and not mastering that himself would be too much at the time. I remember having him sitting on his little chair and DD in her rocker feeding them both at the same time lol

DS didn't walk until DD was a month old, so that was a pretty trying time. But with alot of patience and not fretting about housework etc it made life a little easier. A double pram is a MUST. I didn't have one for a long time, and it really held me back from getting out and about again [I used to walke every day]. The pouch was great, but there were days when it would have been nice just to go to the park and be able to relax a little better and be able to play with DS while DD slept cosy in the pram.

My rule of thumb when I have a new babe [because I learnt after having #1!] "the first 6 months suck. Don't expect anythng of yourself except to keep the kids and yourself feed and clothed". And it's true. Rose coloured glasses don't work when you're having a bad day.

I loved having my kids so close together, yep I had my days [and I still do!!], but the relationship they have grown up with is amazing. They are in the same year at high school now, and the best of friends