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Thread: Dad Who Comes and Goes

  1. #1

    Join Date
    Oct 2007
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    Gold Coast
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    Default Dad Who Comes and Goes

    My DH works a roster where he is away for two weeks then back for two weeks. DD is beginning to notice his absence and it is very unsettling for her as he is very hands-on when he's home. Her sleep (day and night) goes out the window and she is easily upset during the day when she is normally so happy. I wonder if anyone has any ideas to help her at these times? Naturally, at 6m I can't explain the situation to her. I've tried giving her a t-shirt he's worn which didn't help much. When he talks to her on the phone it confuses her and she looks around for him, so I don't think a voice recording would help either. Any ideas would be appreciated...


  2. #2

    Join Date
    Sep 2006
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    the mulberry bush
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    that is really hard.... i don't really have any ideas except this one, and it may be laughable but i'll go ahead and say it anyway.... what about if he was the tv, like if u took a video of him singing her a favorite song or doing something really familiar, and played it at the same time each day like incorporated it into her daily routine.... like before bed or first thing in the morning or i dunno.... again its probably a ridiculous idea and i dunno at 6months if they respond to the tele, but my girl who is 10 months sure does so maybe its worth a try.... not sure if it would confuse her more though.
    i guess when she is a bit older she will comprehend more that even though daddy goes away he always comes back.

    my dd at the moment cries when her dad leaves for work for the day, so we go outside and wave him off as he drives off in the car, and it solves the problem... again, this doesn't really help you much, but i think it might get a bit easier as she gets older and understands more perhaps.

    good luck.

  3. #3

    Default

    Can DH and you get webcams? My DS has been interacting iwth his grandfather via webcam since he was born. It really does work. He is quite funny with it actually. I have been thinking about sending pappy a storybook to read him when he is online, and we have a copy of it here, so aston can look at the pictures.

  4. #4

    Join Date
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    Gold Coast
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    Default

    Thanks Emma and Vicky. We can't do webcams as he works in remote areas without a lot of phone coverage but I think the video may be worth a try, especially as part of the routine like you suggested - that's a great idea. Maybe a couple of different ones for different parts of the day. It's definitely worth a shot and I think she will look at the telly if he's on it - she likes his photo. Thanks again.

  5. #5

    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    KA, Western Australia
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    Hi Sacha

    My DH works a roster of 2 weeks away and one week at home and DS is starting to notice now too, and i really dont know what to do either! DS is no longer interested in TV and we couldn't use webcams either as DH works remote areas too. Oh and DS looks around for DH too when he talks to him on the phone, and trys to eat it!

    I always make sure that i tell DS that daddy loves him, especially when i put him to bed, and i give a kiss and cuddle from us both telling him that one's from daddy and one's from me.

    I know he probably doesn't understand this yet but when he gets a bit older he will so i will just continue it for as long as needed to i guess.

    Its a hard situation especially when our DS/DD are only young, there's not alot we can do.

  6. #6

    Join Date
    Oct 2007
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    Gold Coast
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    Sent you a PM Jessikah

  7. #7
    smiles4u Guest

    Smile

    The video sounds like the best option !!!

    ... Couldn't imagine at this stage what else you could do ???

    Hey, let us know if it makes a difference

    Thinking of you, ... Fingers crossed it works at least a little to help your sweet lil girl

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