I don't think children learn they are going to be picked up, it is actually a well documented instinctual reaction for a baby to cry like any other reflex. It dates back to caveman days and when a baby was "abandoned" or something happened to the babies carer they would cry till someone would find them before a tiger or predator did. Children do not have the perception of object permanence (this means that when something disappears from view, they have no concept that it may still be near) till they are around 8 months old, which is one of the reasons why most child professionals do not recommend CC before 8 months as you are interfering with a natural instinct that is part of growth and learning (it has also been linked to Reactive Attachment Disorder). They have said this can lead to a perpetual feeling of abandonment. If you get a chance look up Reactive Attachment Disorder, there is a website with a video (which I can't find but if I do I will post it) that discusses how CC does cause a form of RAD in some babies. As for picking them up I very rarely picked up my son to comfort him yet I still went with him and stayed with him to comfort him whenever he cried as a baby. But had he been a child that needed to be picked up I would have. Having done both forms of settling I feel that whilst the comfort method is more involved to begin with I had way less relapses than I did with CC and my own emotional well being, as well as my child's, was better off. However, this is my own experience and I am not saying it is everyones.

But back on topic though, with the wrapping Seth and Paris both cracked it initially with regards to wrapping but they went to sleep a lot quicker and also slept better when wrapped. Just keep trying different things hon, and remember what may work one day may not the next. Its all relative to where they are development wise, wind, teething, sickness this all plays a part as well as over stimulation and missing the sleep cues even by a second either side of tired and overtired. Some babies are just more sensitive than others, and even though it drives you insane it does get easier. And remember no one is going to hate you if you need a breather and if that means you holler out to someone to help or put bubs in the pram and go for a walk so you can regain some sanity and keep going then do it. I would highly recommend getting a copy of "The Wonder Weeks" as it definitely makes it a lot easier to cope with if you can understand what's going on with them.