Do I need to socialise my baby?

[Kristin27]

I've had some troubles lately with my 3 month old DD screaming when anyone else but DH or I pick her up. I think she has a sensitivity to pefume (I've started another thread in relation to this!) because the people she cries around when being held are my mum, sister, MIL and friends who all wear strong perfume, plus it has upset her when I've worn it. Anyway, one of them suggested that I don't socialise DD enough and I should get her used to different people holding her?? What do you all think about this?

[onthefly]

I would say she's far too young for you to be concerned about social skills - it's far more likely that she's upset by the perfume. Can you ask them to not wear it for a day and see if it makes a difference? Babies that young usually aren't too worried about different people pickign them up (not saying there's something wrong with your DD, just think this suggests that she's reacting to perfume or something like that).

[BhoysGirl]

I often think that the comments people make about "socialising" your baby by sharing them around (ie pass the parcel) are more of a comment about what they want, rather than what is best for your bub. If it were my baby, then I'd be holding onto her if that was what kept her happy & content, and definitely not worrying about what other people are saying. She'll more than likely grow to like other people & interact with them more as she gets older, but at 3 months, I don't think that it's entirely reasonable to put a baby into situations that distress her, even if the people wanting to hold & cuddle her are well meaning.

[onthefly]

at 3 months, I don't think that it's entirely reasonable to put a baby into situations that distress her, even if the people wanting to hold & cuddle her are well meaning.

Totally agree

[Laranna]

Totally agree with the other posts. However, my DS went through the same thing, screamed the house down if someone other than me or DP held him. Now that you mention it, it was only my mum, sister and MIL that he cried for too, but none of them wear perfume, so I didn't link it to anything. I just thought it was a bit of him just wanting only his mummy and daddy. He's got past it now and will happily be cuddled by others most of the time.

[Kristin27]

Thanks for your replies. I agree BhoysGirl, I think the comment was more about what this person wanted (cuddles) not what is best for my DD. It does really distress DD and takes me ages to calm her so I think I'll be holding onto her for now.

Thanks

[Mum0809]

My DS went through the same thing at about this age. I just stopped letting people hold him . I think it annoyed a few people but better then DS getting distressed. Now he will go to anyone and everyone, even people he doesn't know. I think if I had pushed him onto people he wouldn't be so social now. I think your DD just needs her mummy. She will go to other people when she is ready. Don't let people make you feel bad about it!!!