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Thread: going insane.

  1. #1

    Join Date
    Mar 2004
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    perth,Australia
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    2,302

    Default going insane.

    Fot the last 5 nights my DD has been waking up at 10pm.She goes to bed at 7pm. She remains lying down in the cot but continues to cry and get herself worked up.I have tried reassurance(makes it worse) and to see whether she is hot/cold or teethiing.She has a tooth coming but with the way she is crying its more of a "i cant sleep cry".
    I got so mad last night with hubby as after an hr of millana crying he just remained in his bed.I had a headache and when i said do you want to try this time he got mad at me and said he has to work tommorow and its my job.I blew my stack and basically called him everyname under the sun and was so mad said i hated him.I told him i might as well be a single mum.I didnt ask him to assist any of the other nights.It just so annoys me that his majesty didnt even bother to ask if she was alright or do i need help.
    I got her to sleep by panadol and rocking her(for the teeth) and she slept till 6am.
    I am stressing out that soon i will be doing this with two.I dont get a break at all.Only when she is asleep.Im just annoyed,i thought 2 parents were there to help raise there child.


  2. #2
    Ghada Guest

    Default

    Hi caddie,
    (((hugs))) to you, i completely understand where your coming from. I have 3 childrem myself, ages 4.5, 2 and 5months. It can get very demanding and full on in this household thats for sure. Dh is the same, he loves his kids but sometimes doesnt even think to ask "are you ok" or "do you want me to help out with anything". I also feel as though i am a single mother of three...and its very trying at the best of times - i take my hat off to all the single mothers out there thats for sure.

    At times, i lose it and tell hubby exactly what i think and feel - then he'll respond and help out for a little while before he forgets ams goes back to normal.

    Im sorry i dont really have any advice for you as such, but just wanted to let you know that you certainly arent alone...i feel for you, its darn hard. Good on you for doing a fabulous job at mothering your little one!!!

  3. #3

    Join Date
    Jan 2005
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    Down by the ocean
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    Default

    for you Caddie.
    Some nights I get woken up by both DS's eg one is thirsty and the other has had a bad dream etc. They never go to DH's side of the bed and he hardly ever hears them. It worries me how I will cope with a newborn if they are both waking (thankfully they both don't wake every night). Sometimes DH does hear and gets up to them which I am thankful for but then I feel guilty and worry about him getting enough sleep. Especially as his job requires him to a lot of driving.
    We have a lot of early nights and DH will come home and have a nap some days too. I don't know if that is an option for your DH but if he's tired at work then getting a bit of extra sleep may help him be motivated to get out of that nice warm bed and settle DD for you.
    Maybe try talking to him when you are both relaxed and calm about how you will need some help with DD when the baby comes along especially when you are up doing night feeds. It is a big change and I agree totally it is a team effort

  4. #4

    Join Date
    Mar 2004
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    perth,Australia
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    Default

    Thanks girls,it really helps to talk about this and i feel thankgod im not the only one.It is hard to talk rationally when we are borth tired and grumpy.I will take your advice sammi and talk when im in a better mood.

  5. #5

    Default

    Caddie, you poor thing - its so tough when you can't get any sleep and your DH isn't helping. Parenting is a team effort and I think that alot of guys don't realise just how hard it can be to look after children 24/7.
    Maybe you should organise some time off for yourself. You can ask DH to take Millana out for a couple of hours of daddy/daughter time on the weekend while you put your feet up or go for a coffee (anything except catching up on the house work). I always find that if DH spends some time single parenting he's much more appreciative of what I do (for a while - then he forgets). I think that some guys would like to help out more but they're not sure exactly how. If I tell DH to help more he looks a bit blank but if I ask him to do the washing up, or the floors or look after Yasin for a couple of hours he can get his head around it much more easily.
    What about family - can your Mum or Dad or an IL help out by doing a bit of baby sitting so you can take a break.

  6. #6

    Join Date
    Mar 2004
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    perth,Australia
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    My mum and dad are away at the moment travelling.When they are home they sometimes look after millana whilst i pay a bill or something.My sister would but she works and there is no way millana would stay with mil as she hardly sees her.Even though she lives half an hour away.
    So maybe i should say to Dh to look after her on a weekend,im sure it will go down a treat whilst he is watching football.
    This weekend we go camping for 10 days with no electricity or running water.I will definatley be saying something because i want a break too.I dont want to be running around after millana at camp whilst he is out all day fishing.I so hope she behaves herself at night camping.It could be the trip from hell!

  7. #7

    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    Adelaide
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    874

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    You poor thing. Could you strike a deal with him and get him to get up to Bubs on weekends (Fri Night and Sat Night) to give you some kind of break at least. Or put a baby moniter on next to his head at night!!

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