While pregnant...
MIL "You're not going to be one of those mothers that ......................... pulls out a boob every time the baby cries / spoils your child / picks them up every time they cry"

On my first mothers day
I picked up DS as he was crying..... MIL "You'll spoil him"
Me "You cant spoil a child with love"
MIL scoffs

Everytime DS cried while I took him off to feed (as I was told to feed in PILs bedrooms as apparantly I would be more comfortable there)
MIL "Oh, is your mother starving you"
Me screaming in my head "If I was allowed to pull out my boob in public he would be content right now" (if there is a next time I am letting it all hang out just to annoy them)

When we were invited to MIL house for dinner but told to bring dinner for DS because they dont know what to feed him?? WTF? Just cook some vegies and whatever else you are serving
DS whinging as we arrived past his dinner time "Doesn't she feed you"
Me screaming in my head "I believe YOU are the one incapable of feeding him you stupid cow"

I need to learn to bite my tongue LESS!!