HELP! He HATES the car!!!

[nox]

Hi there!

My son is just over 3 months and has always seems to hate the car.
Doesn't matter for how long ... 5 mins or 3 hours it's the same.
Although very very rarely he will be ok.

Any suggestions as to what I can do?

I am just terrified of driving anywhere!!!!

[visitor1]

Im not sure where, but my MIL found some car amusement thingys that strap under the car seat...and has dangly things bub can stare at or play with.

I have one for my 1 year old and it keeps her happy.

Maybe try some toys stuck to the window (with suction caps...ive seen the toys in Kmart and Target), music.

DD2 hates the car too....and we do alot of travelling to NSW so im hoping she grows out of it!

[moki]

My DD also hated the car from birth, until she had enough head control for us to turn her seat forwards (about 6 months). I eventually worked out that the problem was the sun coming through the back window and getting in her eyes. Perhaps it might be the same for your boy? Maybe some kind of sun shade for the rear window will help?

[Starfish]

My DD hates the car too. We find the following things help:
1) We have hung some toys off the capsule handles that she can play with. One of them plays a lullaby when squeezed and she loves it.
2) If both DH and I are in the car, one of us sits in the back with her. This has been the single most effective thing so far, so if there is more than one adult in the car, have them sit next to your baby.
3) DD is breastfed, so if we go for a long drive and she gets hungry but we can't stop, we take a bottle of EBM or a bottle of cooled boiled water to give to her during the drive.

Hope this helps.

[nox]

Thanks everyone!

I should have mentioned that I have tried to put toys on the handles, including a mirror. I have also spent most of my time in the back seat with him. There is a sun shade on the side window and I am careful to put a muslin over him if there is any other sun coming through.

None of this seems to work though and I am beside myself.
He is a 'big' boy for 3 months: 7.3kg and 64.5cm long. I am wondering if the discomfort could be the council rented capsule? He loves to sit up as much as possible -- even in the pram or on my lap. Could it be the capsules (Safe and Sound) are too reclining for him? Are combo seats that can be purchased more upright in the backwards position?

I rented the capsule to prevent having to buy a reversible but as you can see I am desperate!

What do you think?

[visitor1]

My sisters kids never liked capsules....

Both my girls have reversible car seats...Chelsea wasnt a big fan of rearward facing, and like ur DS needed to sit up more rather then lay down.

Perhaps it is cos he is a big boy (wow...Chelsea was about those stats at 8 months old) the capsule is not a good idea for him.

From memory that capsule u have dont look comfortable either!

Can you hire other types of seats from the council?

ETA: google 'Hire for baby'. My friend used this company and they are a great help

[LuluHB]

My DD hated being in a capsule. She screamed a lot of the time in it, so we put her in a reversible car seat at about 5 weeks old - problem solved.

[Arimeh]

Aricyn is 11 months old, and still not a big fan of the car ride!!! I remember one time when he was really little, he was SCREAMING in the car seat, my husband and I were going insane... so... we turned up the stereo.. we have a sub in the boot, and we put on something really basey (for all of you music fans out there, we put on Ministry) and with the "thud, thud thud" five minutes later he was asleep. Worked for us then, and sometimes works for us now. If he is screaming now we try to play peek a boo from the front seat with him, and then if nothing else works, toys, biscuits, water, etc... we put the windows down and the music up... at least the screaming doesn't echo around the interior of the car when the windows are down!!!!!!!! :-)

[nox]

Hilarious Aricyn's Mum! I have tried to pump up the volume too but my sound system isn't big enough obviously!

LuluHB -- does this mean that reversible car seats are different to capsules? ie they are obviously ok for bubs but they are at different angles or something?

[LuluHB]

Nox - the capsule has their spines on more of a curve than a reversible car seat does. The car seat has them laid back, but with a quite a straight spine.

[Schmickers]

Both of our children have hated the car, regardless of what we did - forwards, or backwards, seat or capsule, company in the back or not. Molly only really settled down when she was 18 months and we got a car with an in-built DVD player. Olivia settled down at around 9 months by herself. But until then, driving anywhere with them was purgatory.

Some children just really hate the car.

[Michelle71]

Yep - my little man used to be ok but now it is horrible He cries and screams until we get him out, which is not good considering we are travelling 500km for Christmas. The last time I did that trip it took 8 hours (usually less than 6 including stops). Reinforces why controlled crying (for us) is not an option - he doesn't stop!!!

[nox]

BAH! Was hoping for a fix answer but obviously just one of those things! I wrote to Safe and Sound to tell them that DS HATES their capsule and to see what they may recommend. I sure hope that he grows out of it soon. It makes it very very hard to go anywhere!

[LuluHB]

Your bubby will not necessarily be as bad as Schmickers and Michelle have said. It may be the capsule, or may be that he just hates the car too. Do you have a friend with a reversible car seat that you can put your DS into and go for a drive, just to see? A friend of mine's DS screamed the whole time he was rear facing (whatever he was in) but was perfect when they turned him to face front - of course, Mummy has to survive that long!!

[Emma1979]

i haven't read any of the answers just wanted to quickly say that my dd was the same, she used to SCREAM BLUE MURDER in the car and it was so so so upsetting, my parents and all my friends lived over an hour away and i used to absolutely dread the journey, it was so awful..... from about roughly five months though, it all stopped.... she would sleep or if awake would generally be happy.... so just wanted to say it IS a phase and he will get better.... at the time i used to stress about it so much but it passed and i hadn't thought of it until i read your post. also my dd is alot happier now that she is facing the front, they often get car sick when rear facing, but obviously its best not to turn them around until they are exceeding the weight limit for rear facing.

hang in there it will pass...

also i saw in toys r us this device that was like a toy but it attached to the backseat and it had a (safe) mirror so you can see bubs and bubs can see you, not sure if it would help but u never know, maybe seeing you would calm him??

[nox]

Ahhhhh thanks for these answers. I am relieved that people have lived to see the other side of this!!! haha

Is the change to forward facing only dependent on height and weight? Or total head control required?
It may not be so far away then ...

[~Jayne~]

Nox,

I'm not sure if anybody has suggested this earlier but have you thought of taking him to the Chiropractor? Also, does he have reflux?

My first born, had reflux & screamed her lungs out until she was nearly 12 months old in the car, every single journey, even strapping her into the carseat was horrendus. Her paed said that when they are rearward facing it puts pressure on them to make them contract in the stomach area & it makes them feel uncomfortable so that's why she screamed. Then my 2nd bub had a very bumpy ride during delivery & screamed in the car from 6 weeks onwards & I took her to the Chiro because she was so bruised & battered at birth & he said her neck was out. It didn't happen overnight, but she did get better in the car. So maybe that's an option?

Good Luck!

Love Jayne

[nox]

Thanks Jayne we have been seeing an osteo but not for about a month. So you have reminded me that I should make him another appointment and maybe that could also help.

I still think that he would be soooo much happier if I could get him forward facing!!!