How Did YOU Cope When You Stopped Co-Sleeping?

[fionas]

My DD is six months old and sleeps in our room in her cot. DP and I are both happy with that arrangement and I have no plans to move her into her own room anytime soon especially as we need to have her room underpinned and then wait for six months before replastering.

So she will be at least a year old before she can be put into her room.

She's a very easygoing baby who's an excellent sleeper and I'm sure she'll handle a new situation with aplomb.

I'm more worried about how I will cope. I just can't imagine her sleeping in a different room. My mum had my sister in her room until she was three - I nearly fell off my chair when she told me, thinking that was WAY too old but now I'm thinking I can imagine wanting to do the same.

My question for the people who have co-slept with their baby in the same room, is at what age did you feel comfortable moving them and how did you cope? Did it take long to get used to your DS or DD being in a different room? Did you wake up worried?

[~Saram~]

Give up co-sleeping... Can you do that. Just kidding. We cosleep with my DD (she starts the night off in her cot and joins us about 2am) and most mornings my DS climbs in at about 5am and it is just beautiful to wake up to each morning.

Waking up worried - I still wake up to check on my son, I think I will until he leaves home. And yes when he started sleeping through the night in his own room I did miss it but the morning snuggles make up for it

[smiles4u]

Hi Fiona,

... DP & I loved our daughter in her cot in our room so much that we decided rather then put pressure on ourselves & stress ourselves about it as 2 wen do wen put her cot in2 her beautiful nursery that we decided 2 do it wen 'We felt ready'.

So, we felt ready wen she ws about 19mths old (she is now 22mths)

Yeh, I av moments wen I miss her smiley face lookin at me from her cot in the mornings wen I awake BUT I love knowin WE enjoyed her in our room for the time that we did

And YES, I found it hard in the beginning to not go & check on her in HER nursery durin the nite. I think durin the 1st fortnite I wld check on her anythin up 2 3 times a nite. But I felt beta 4 it !!

She had no prob in her transition 2 her nursery as I guess she jst thought it's her same cot & the dark room is jst the same atmosphere. When she awakes in the morns her nursery is a very cheery room wt her fav things 2 look about at. So, she doesn't look bothered at all that it is a different room & besides she knows she sees me very soon afta she wakes up in the morn

... Do wat U feel comfortable wt & don't let others influence U otherwise This is your time 2 ENJOY your baby the way U BOTH want & even need 2

[2CheekyMonkeys]

my DD slept on me or in the bed with me until about 17 months, so when she went in her own room i found it hard to get to sleep myself. they talk about cues for the babies well my baby turned out to be MY sleep cue! :-) it only took about 3 or 4 nights to get used to it though. and yes i was worried about her being in the other room so far away from me but within a week i just seemed to stop thinking about it.

[Astrid]

DD has only just moved out our our room at just over 2 1/2. Probably a bit delayed, but our recent reno's and moving it was just not practical. She seems to be quite ready for it, but we are all still adjusting. One part of me feels so relieved to have our bedroom back, but the other part really misses her. On cold nights it was nice to have her up against my back and it was good knowing she was ok without having to get up and check on her.

[Ezz]

I'm struggling with this at the moment. DS is really too big for the bassinette (he's almost 8kg now & it's supposed to have a weight limit of 5.9kg ). But I just can't bring myself to put him in his cot in the other room. He sleeps in the cot during the day (because his room is air-conditioned - mine isn't), but at night I like to have him in with us.

[Juliette]

Hi Fiona,

Just do things as you and DD feel ready would be my advice. Hannah co-slept with us (mostly, apart from a short stint after we went to sleep school - then I just brought her back in with us because it just didn't feel right) until she was about 18 months, then wanted to try her own room for a little while, and has ended up back in our bed with us (she's 3 in May). Now that Sammy has arrived, he sleeps in a bassinette next to me, and we'll move him into a portacot beside the bed when he grows out of that. So we're all in together at the moment! For the most part, DH and I love it. She gets a bit wriggly and annoying at times, but they're only little for such a short time and I don't want to miss any of it! Particularly as I'll be going back to work in June/July-ish and DH will get to stay at home with them!

I did find it difficult when Hannah moved into her own room at first, but it helped to know that this was something she wanted to do. Now that she's back in with us, I figure she'll let us know when she's ready to go back to her own room. It's unlikely she'll still be there as a teenager!!!!

[paradise lost]

I moved DD into her cot in her own room when she was 6months.

I did it because i had started seeing DP (her daddy and i had broken up 4 months previously). It wasn't for my sexlife (you can have sex anywhere in a house) but because i didn't want DP and DD to have too much contact until i was sure he and i were going to be long-term. Of course i thought we would be or i wouldn't have been with him but i figured DD deserved more than what i "thought". I kept them apart until DP and i had been together about a year (he saw her three or four times in that first year) and once we began talking about buying a house together and she knew VERY well who Dada was, i gradually introduced him to her.

In the days when i moved her DP was only staying here 1 night a week at most, and not usually when DD was here (when she was with XP) BUT i didn't want her to feel, on those rare occasions when he stayed while she was here, that i'd put her out of the bedroom for him. I wanted her to have her own place no matter what and i realised she needed to be in her own room.

I missed her like crazy at first. Because there were only about 2 days/month when DP was actually here i felt like i was sleeping all alone for mainly no reason. I would check on her once or twice every night at first, but i grew to trust the audio monitor was good enough that i could REALLY hear her quite quickly (I still now check her before i go to bed, and if i feel like it again in the night i do). In addition she was still breastfed for the first month so i'd have to get up and bring her in with me at 5am every day.

BUT from her POV she slept MUCH better as soon as i moved her. I had the baby-monitor right next to my head so even her sighing would wake me, but she was so much less fretful in her own room. She still came in with me from 5am onwards (DP was once there, i lay between them and got us as soon as she woke again at 8am) and even now she will wake up about 7am potter about in her room for a bit and then come and put her cold feet on me. LOL. As soon as i dropped the 5am feed she began sleeping through to 8am (i switched to formula but she never wanted a bottle then) which gave her 12 hours unbroken sleep. She just seems to be the sort of person who settles better in her own peace and quiet.

[Astrid]

I do think it is hard for DD at the moment, whislt she certainly likes to be near us and sleep, I think she was no longer coping with DH's snoring. So she is sleeping longer in her own room, but is waking upset and wanting cuddles. For the sake of her own hearing she needs her own room and sometime I think I do

[mib]

I really struggled when M began sleeping all night in his own bed.
I was so use to having him beside me , that i would wake up wonder where he was and then fly into his room to check on him ! During the 1st couple of weeks , my sleep was horrible , disturbed and restless. but before i knew it i was sleeoing better.
I know get up once during the night to check on him.