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Thread: How do i help her?

  1. #1

    Join Date
    Jul 2004
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    Default How do i help her?

    Here i am again, probably worrying about nothing, but i can't help it.

    I've always been worried about Lily's speech development. She's always been behind in it. I would have tohught that by now, at 2yo, she would be talking heaps. But she's not. All I usually get from her is whinging. And it's driving me bonkers. She knows what most things are, i've heard her say them, but she just won't. The words she does know are: mum, dad, baby, puppy, bunny, cookie, car, bowl, ball, go, bye, hello, pretty, please, thankyou and no. Everytihng else she just whinges or babbles, which is most of the time. She will say maybe 3 actual words a day, if that.

    I read to her all the time, always ask her what she wants until i give it to her. But that usually end in a huge tanty because she will just point and whinge and not tell me what she wants. I'm always saying what things are and re-peating them to her. But she just doesn't want to know.

    It's getting too frustrating when she wants something and i'm having to look after Charlie and then she starts having a meltbown because i can't get her what she wants.

    She understands everything i say though. Like i will ask her to get a nappy, or clothes or to put something away etc. She just won't talk! It's just whinge, whinge, whinge. She is worse than Charlie.



    What can i do without taking her to see someone about it? Or is that my only option?

  2. #2

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    I think you'll find that one day she'll erupt with sentances. Matilda did... suddenly after 2 months of exactly what you are describing she started saying 3 words together. She still has days where she will point & not find the word & get very frustrated, but nothing like the frustration she had over words when she was 2.

    I just would ask her "what do you want?" if I knew & understood I would say "ah! you want xxxx, let me go & get xxxx for you Matilda" I heard someone else on BB do this with their child & it made sense to me to just use the word she was working on heaps, and when DH got home I would say "Matilda had xxxx today" or something like that to get her used to hearing it said out loud a lot. I started talking heaps about everything we were doing and what we were using and how it was used etc etc... I got tired of hearing my own voice, but it suddenly clicked for her & her vocab took off. And she goes through vocabulary spurts where she will suddenly improve over 2 weeks and then stay there for a while...

  3. #3

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    Tegan, Kimberley took ages to talk and wasn't saying much when she was 2 but now you can't shut her up and she picks words up so quickly.

    I think they have to be saying 50 words by the time they are two so if she is doing that i wouldn't worry.
    Alex is slow with his talking also he just talks away in his own way but nothing we can say yep we understand.

  4. #4

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    oh yeah I forgot to mention, Matilda used to chat away & we had no idea what she was saying all the time. Only recently am I able to pick up certain words & figure out what she is chatting away about.

  5. #5

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    No way is Lily saying 50 words. She only says about 15.

    Christy, i'm doing exactly what you said you did with Matilda and i am definatly getting tired of hearing my own voice! I so hope she picks it up soon. It's getting frustrating for us all.

  6. #6

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    I wouldn't worry. My nephew wasn't talking at all at 2 (his was due to autism) but the peadtrician said with children if they aren't talking is it because a) they don't understand or b) just because they aren't ready. As you said your daughter has an understanding, there isn't cause for concern and she will speak in her own time.

  7. #7

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    Hey Tegan,
    At 2yo I think Aidyn had even less than 15 proper words...
    I told myself that I would look into his speech if he had not picked up more by 2.5yo. Well now he is a bit over 2.5, and he is picking up new words so fast! The other day he learnt 4 new words in one day (grandma, OK, steamroller and crash), and he is now talking in 2 word sentences which is a big improvement. Although he is still behind for his age, I am not worried any more, as he is picking it all up at such a quick rate.
    I would say to give Lily a bit more time, and continue to do what you are doing by reading to her and repeating the same words over. It WILL sink in eventually!
    Maybe the first thing you can get checked is her hearing, just to make sure its all fine, but then I really wouldnt stress too much about it for a while yet.

    Also when Aidyn was that age, he had a few words that were unintelligible, but if you listened closely, we learnt that these 'sounds' were his words for actual objects and things, ie, dummie, blankie, cuddle (although they sounded NOTHING like the word they were supposed to be!) so maybe if you can pick up on some of her own language it may help with the frustration on both your parts?

  8. #8

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    Do they offer the ear checks for fluid in NSW?
    Its worth getting this checked anyway, even though its not the most liekly explanation
    My cousins daughter had delayed speech wich they eventualy figured out was caused by fuild in her ear (not sure if this is glue ear or not) and she had grommets put in. she's been like a different child ever since. She could hear well, but it was muffled IYKWIM.

  9. #9

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    I would definitely get her hearing checked, you can do it for free through the hospital usually. It may be fine but its worth covering all your bases, a good friends boy was doing what your daughter is and she had his hearing checked and it turned out he had glue ear and needed grommets. Once they were in his speech really took off.

  10. #10
    NewmumLou Guest

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    Hi Teagan! I am a preschool-primary school teacher. I think Lilly is fine. I would bet any money on it that she is feeling a little jealous of her baby brother, and the best way to get your attention and hold onto it is to not talk, so you spend more time with her. When a new sibling comes into the family it takes a while for all family members to adjust! especially for the other sisters or brothers, as they were the only ones for a while. I know it is hard, but try to remain calm and relaxed, give her least amount of attention in regards to fussing over her talking. Use short words with her, and i bet she will come around, give her a couple of months. Oh by the way try extending her vocab by asking open ended questions eg: what do you like about the little basket instead of do you like the basket. This encourages them to use more words rather than yes or no. Good luck!

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