Sarah what about a sticker chart leading to a big boy prize for all the big boy stuff he does and get him to help you with Juliette and have stickers he can choose from. Maybe one for big bro stuff and another for big boy stuff and make sure he shows daddy
Oh honey - give Zander a big hug from me - and in return he is sure to be giving you one from me as well
It must be hard for him to have had his world turned upside down and I don't really have any suggestions but maybe asking him to do something "to show Juliette how, because she doesn't know how yet" might get a response. Sort of like him being in charge and having this wealth of information that only he has.
Sarah, I would definitely say that it is jealousy, and rebellion at not getting more of your time. I have heard it said that your older child "regresses" by about 6 months at the birth of a new sibling. I have found that not only did J go through this at the time T was born, he still does sometimes. And like Z, he picks and chooses as to whether he is a "big boy" or a "little boy" depending on what suits him at that point in time!!
The PPs have given you some good suggestions. I have used them all at various times. The thing that I have found works best however, is concentrated one on one time with him, and even talking about what is going on. "Mummy has to help T with this as he is a baby and can't do it by himself like you can. Soon he will be bigger and you can teach him how to do it himself. Would you like that?" sort of thing. Also, lots and lots of praise and attention when he does do things by himself. And just sometimes, doing things for him so that he doesn't feel too hard done by LOL!
GL with it hun. It is frustrating, but you are a great mum, and I know you will continue to find ways to ensure that Z feels loved.
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