Not melodramatic Rach at all, noses have been the bane of my life until recently.
What worked finally for us was teaching Darcy to blow bubbles with her nose in the pool/at the end of the bath (when she wasn't sick). We were trying to get her to stop hanging onto her nose in the pool lol (which she still does) but on the upside she figured out that it wasn't so bad and blowing your nose helped you feel better.
I figured out she got the most angst from DH wiping her nose because (while not intentionally) he is a great hulk of a man, who cannot imagine how hard he is wiping someone elses (little) nose. Using a baby wipe helped too because it's cooling and softer.
Thank you so much everyone for your kind replies. You have given me some excellent ideas.
At this stage though, I feel like letting the snot run out so we could wipe it would be a huge step for us. It’s the sniffing and swallowing that just does my head (and stomach) in although I realise there are issues with that as well.
Ahhh, there is so much about babyhood and toddlerhood to cry about and miss when they grow out of it, but geez I am going to be throwing the party to end all parties when we can leave this stage behind.
Can he tell you why he won't / can't / doesn't want to blow his nose? Only reason I ask is maybe its actually causing him discomfort to blow? I was exactly the same as a child. Took ages for my mum to get me to effectively master the nose-blow, and to this day I still really dislike blowing my nose. Mainly because I'm terrible at it (don't seem to be able to get the snot out) and it also hurts, mainly in my ear passages. The pressure it creates in my ears is immense and I will avoid blowing my nose just to avoid that pain & sensation. I had chronic ear, nose & throat issues as a child so I think its partly related.
Sorry, don't know if it offers any insight or assistance, but maybe ask him why he's suddenly stopped. I hear you on the snot swallowing though.....I doubt I'd handle that well either.
Infinity, thank you so much or your reply and your insight. Yes, DS has had recurrent ear infections his whole life and about 4 or 5 instances of perforated ear drum. We are getting to the point now where we think his hearing may be affected, so we will be off for a hearing test soon I think.
Anyway, we went to see his doctor today (two infected ears and a perforated ear drum, again) and we spoke about the sniffing and swallowing. His Dr didn’t seem to think it was a health issue at all, he reckons it doesn’t make any difference to the length and severity of the sickness if you blow it out or suck it in. It’s just personal choice and aesthetics. He said it’s also a developmental thing and DS just isn’t ready to blow his nose and that us pushing the issue will most likely to make it worse as DS digs his heals in. So we have to let go, get over it, stop stressing and just leave him to work it out himself. Man I hope I survive till then. It’s so DISGUSTING!
toatlly understand. DS learnt to blow his nose around 18 months old, then at 2.5 years old he just forgot how to. He has only just learnt to blow it again last week at 4.5 years old. I just ignored it for a couple of years, and he started doing it again.
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You have given me some excellent ideas.
although I realise there are issues with that as well.
It’s just personal choice and aesthetics. 
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