My DS started at daycare when he was 15 months. The first couple of weeks my DH dropped him off, but then I had to start doing it, and I bawled like a baby the first few times, but it does get easier. DS was mostly always happy enough to be dropped off, so it was me, rather than him who had the issues, but he's a very social & relaxed kid, so I have it easy I think.
I'm a big fan of saying goodbye, telling him I'm going to work & that I'll see him in the afternoon. Even in the early days, when arguably he didn't get it, it was important to me, rather than just sneaking out. I also let the carers do their job in taking him under their wing to settle once the goodbyes had been said- they're generally very used to dealing with separation issues, and with my DS, I always been told that he settled pretty quickly after I'd left, which made me feel better.
Thanks so much everyone!! I really appreciate the replies. I'll post back when her first day or week is done. I think its the worry that she won't know what's going on and she'll be scared and we aren't there to comfort her that's getting to me... am I thinking too much???
I know you feel hunny, and it might be rough the first week or two (but you and H will probably be more worried and upset than E . When T started, it helped me a bit to know he had things he could comfort himself with, iykwim? Like a blanky or a favorite toy and a dummy.
Big She'll be ok. I guess it's the begining of growing up? ;(
BellyBelly Life Member - Love all your MCN friends
Jun 2004
The Festival State
3,008
some "easing in" ideas for you
- pack an item that has YOUR smell on it e.g tshirt you have worn
- pack a comfort toy of your dd's
- pack a laminated photo of the family
these are things the carer can use to help calm your DD if she is upset
any little quirks/habits of your DD's that you know about, but her carer wouldn't, if it helps you, type them out, so the carer will have that to refer to, if stuck.
They may never need it, but if they do, it's done.
it's great your dh has a week off, that way, he could stay with DD at daycare, to allow her to see that daddy is ok with the daycare place, to give her confidence.
i cannot do the "drop and sneak out" thing myself, my DD settled into three different CCC's just fine, with me staying until she felt ok, and got interested in playing. Then i kissed her and said goodbye and it was fine.
every child is different, different families have different demands on them, do what suits your child, your family.
i found it really hard, to leave my baby (we started at 16 months) with total strangers, even for one short day per week. I learnt it was ok to leave very specific instructions. like i discovered (because i stayed to settle, and came back to breastfeed) that the CCC only had the children DRESSED at the start and end of the day, the rest of the day, they had the babies in nappy and singlet only - to make it easier for nappy changes, less dressing and undressing i suppose (and this was in winter). So i said i wanted bilby fully clothed at all times. They did it, but only because i specifically requested it. If i had not been there at the times i was, i would not have been aware of how they did things, and it would have never occurred to me to request, such a thing. (i would have assumed my DD WAS fully dressed all day).
best of luck, it's a pull at the heartstrings that's for sure! listen to your instincts, when you are leaving a pre-verbal child in care, your instincts are there for a reason. whatever concerns you have, raise them with the carer. a good carer will not mind, they will reassure you.
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Natty
Wow hasn't that six months gone quick!!
. When T started, it helped me a bit to know he had things he could comfort himself with, iykwim? Like a blanky or a favorite toy and a dummy.
She'll be ok. I guess it's the begining of growing up? ;(
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