In a week my DD is starting at FDC. I know thousands of kids go everyday but now its my DD's turn and I am a bit sad. We have been really lucky that she hasn't had to go at all and will be nearly 17 months when she goes but she still seems so little. DH has really enjoyed the past 6 months with her and it was a great way for me to return to work to have him home with her.
He will be taking her next monday, does anyone have any tips to make it easier? He is still on leave for her first week so he can stay for a while and pick her up if she really freaks out.
I'm so worried about her being scared and missing us!!
I'm in the same boat, Ezymay. I feel so awful for sending him, even though it will only be one day per week. Looking for all the advice I can get, too!
Its so hard isn't it? I hope your little one loves it. DD started end of last year and I wish I could say she loves it but we are still finding our groove. Hopefully she will take to it like a duck to water.
i remember Dd1's first day, i cried like a little girl, and she ran off happy as a lark!
our centre allowed me to come in 3times for half an hour each so the DD1 could see what goes on so she went over morning tea time, lunch time and arvo tea time, it made her feel really settled and made me feel better about the people and place i was leaving her. that made it easier for me anyway.
u can ring them whenever u need too and at DD1's, parents are more than welcome to stay as long as they want and even mosey in through the day to have a sneak peek!
It is scary but DS adores his FDC and has been asking to go even when we have been on holidays!
Your DD is such a friendly little thing that I am sure she will be fine, she only has to get used to 1 new adult at least- I found with DS that made it really easy and he was only 8 months when he started.
My DS started at daycare when he was 15 months. The first couple of weeks my DH dropped him off, but then I had to start doing it, and I bawled like a baby the first few times, but it does get easier. DS was mostly always happy enough to be dropped off, so it was me, rather than him who had the issues, but he's a very social & relaxed kid, so I have it easy I think.
I'm a big fan of saying goodbye, telling him I'm going to work & that I'll see him in the afternoon. Even in the early days, when arguably he didn't get it, it was important to me, rather than just sneaking out. I also let the carers do their job in taking him under their wing to settle once the goodbyes had been said- they're generally very used to dealing with separation issues, and with my DS, I always been told that he settled pretty quickly after I'd left, which made me feel better.
Thanks so much everyone!! I really appreciate the replies. I'll post back when her first day or week is done. I think its the worry that she won't know what's going on and she'll be scared and we aren't there to comfort her that's getting to me... am I thinking too much???
I know you feel hunny, and it might be rough the first week or two (but you and H will probably be more worried and upset than E . When T started, it helped me a bit to know he had things he could comfort himself with, iykwim? Like a blanky or a favorite toy and a dummy.
Big She'll be ok. I guess it's the begining of growing up? ;(
BellyBelly Life Member - Love all your MCN friends
Jun 2004
The Festival State
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some "easing in" ideas for you
- pack an item that has YOUR smell on it e.g tshirt you have worn
- pack a comfort toy of your dd's
- pack a laminated photo of the family
these are things the carer can use to help calm your DD if she is upset
any little quirks/habits of your DD's that you know about, but her carer wouldn't, if it helps you, type them out, so the carer will have that to refer to, if stuck.
They may never need it, but if they do, it's done.
it's great your dh has a week off, that way, he could stay with DD at daycare, to allow her to see that daddy is ok with the daycare place, to give her confidence.
i cannot do the "drop and sneak out" thing myself, my DD settled into three different CCC's just fine, with me staying until she felt ok, and got interested in playing. Then i kissed her and said goodbye and it was fine.
every child is different, different families have different demands on them, do what suits your child, your family.
i found it really hard, to leave my baby (we started at 16 months) with total strangers, even for one short day per week. I learnt it was ok to leave very specific instructions. like i discovered (because i stayed to settle, and came back to breastfeed) that the CCC only had the children DRESSED at the start and end of the day, the rest of the day, they had the babies in nappy and singlet only - to make it easier for nappy changes, less dressing and undressing i suppose (and this was in winter). So i said i wanted bilby fully clothed at all times. They did it, but only because i specifically requested it. If i had not been there at the times i was, i would not have been aware of how they did things, and it would have never occurred to me to request, such a thing. (i would have assumed my DD WAS fully dressed all day).
best of luck, it's a pull at the heartstrings that's for sure! listen to your instincts, when you are leaving a pre-verbal child in care, your instincts are there for a reason. whatever concerns you have, raise them with the carer. a good carer will not mind, they will reassure you.
Thanks for such a great post Gigi...lots of good advice there...Tomorrow is the day eeek!! I hope I can concentrate on work. I'll be worrying about her so much.
Awww Ezymay - thinking of you today and I hope it goes brilliantly! If it's any consolation, my DS started 3 weeks ago, and he is loving it! He's also doing FDC (previously with family only), and thus far *touch wood* we've had not a tear on leaving or pickup. He just can't wait to play with the other children and the toys. So hopefully your little one will have a similar experience.
oh and I have to say, our FDC lady has been just brilliant for making sure he was settled in and really focussing on ensuring it was all ok for him.
Well we got through the first day!! DH said she cried heaps when he dropped her off clutching a photo the 3 of us (I bawled when DH told me that) But when I rang at lunch time the carer said she was settling in well. She slept so that's positive. The carer said Em really liked her grown up son and would go to him rather than her, I think this will change as she gets to know the carer, who is lovely. Her friends should be there on Wednesday so that will be good someone she knows to play with. She cried again when DH went to pick her up. It can only get better right?
That sounds like a great first day Ez! FWIW my eldest is 3.5 and STILL has a cry when I leave him at daycare and he's gone since he was 9mths old! But when I ask the carers at pickup time if he was ok they tell me 5min after I left he was like "Mum who?" lol She'll get better as time goes by
Ez, I have a family photo in Sam's daycare bag as well. Sam did ok with our first day on Friday. I dropped him off later than I would normally so he was tired and wanting a bottle when I left. He slept, but not as long as he does at home. He was incredibly tired when I got there to pick him up - they knew I was coming to get him soon so kept him up rather than putting him to sleep and then having to wake him. He ended up sleeping from 3:30 until after 6 when we got home.
I figure he must have done ok as the carers commented on his gorgeous laugh, so he had to have enjoyed himself!
I'm a little stressed about Friday coming as it will be a longer day there - The early drop off will be ok, I'm just a bit worried about his afternoon sleep with me not being able to pick him up until later. I guess I can always ring the centre and tell school I have to go early if he's really tired and I don't have a class on.
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My baby is starting daycare!
Natty
Wow hasn't that six months gone quick!!
. When T started, it helped me a bit to know he had things he could comfort himself with, iykwim? Like a blanky or a favorite toy and a dummy.
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