It all sounds perfectly annoying & yet horrible to live through.

The most important thing is to be calm. Remember that she is 3 and doesn't know how to process everything yet. With Matilda we made a bed in our room for her to go if she needed to sleep in our room. We also did a few things about childcare, I would go early and sit with her and play for 30 minutes and set a timer, when it went off I would say "Goodbye my sweet I love you" and walk out. I always phoned 5 minutes later and she was happy.

Matilda didn't eat dinner for 2 months when I was pregnant with Jovie. We developed the 20 minute rule and set the timer for that as well.... that way I didn't stress, we gave her enough time with dinner, and if she didn't eat, well.... not much more I could do about it. It was stressful at first because I would offer her 3 meals, and fret and fuss over her not eating, a few weeks after I stopped fussing, she started eating. I also noted her favourite foods, and made sure to make those every other day. Or as a part of the meal for that night.

The nana thing is definately a phase as well. If I am around, Matilda won't talk too, or acknowledge grandma. But if they have alone time, they get along great. So I make sure I remove myself from the situation and it works really well. Everytime Matilda is supposed to go to Grandma's she refuses, but she always has fun, so I ignore it and just say "thats the way it is".

I don't tolerate rudeness. Saying "I don't want too" is one thing, and I don't consider that rude, just saying what they think etc... but if I hear someone being rude I would say "That is not on, I will not hear anyone being rude to another person. What you said was xxxx and that is not allowed, do you feel zzzz? " and I try to work out why she is rude and then I try to encourage her to be polite by teaching her the right words to say.

Goodluck it can be frustrating.