night routine for 18 month old

[~TT40~]

=(
So basically this is not "normal"
We made an effort to keep her night routine consistent forever. If we try something new we do it for a good week at least ...
Most recent change has been moving her into her own room. But it hasn't made any difference. ..
But we do the same as everyone else does. We have dinner about 530/6. Then she has bath/shower. Then a nudie run then in pjs. And then we read on the couch or she plays a quiet game on the floor or couch with us. Then when she tells me its bed time we take her to bed. This is normally about 7ish/730. (We have tried earlier before she tells me. Wr have tried later by keeping her on the couch as long as possible). Then we go to her room (been over a month now) and daddy ssys good night and she ha ger nigh nighs milk which she pulls off herself when she is done. I sing to her (same set of songs her whole life) and when shes done I give her a cuddle and kiss tell her I love hrr and nigh nighs and lay her on her bed (its a single bed but legs taken off so it's only the height on the mattress). Oh teddy is involved. ..she does everything I do to her to her teddy itms.
Now this is where she wont stay still! She rolls and arxhes and stands on her head and kicks and throws hererlf around and cries. I make sure she stays on the bed. But ive tried everything! Except leave the room. Ive tried laying in bed with her (this does make it worse most of the time) ive tried sitting on the edge of the bed, sitting on the other side of the room. Ive tried the no talking or eye contact. Ive tried shhhing. Ive tried more singing ive tried patting and rubbing and drawing on her back. Ive even tried bf her more. But every night it's over an hr (very unpleasant hour) until she just stops fighting. And is then snoring.
If dh comes in to help it just seems to make it worse and we have to start again. And if I leave the room (with dh in there with her) all hell breaks loose.

I want someone in the room until she falls asleep. .at least for now. Esp if she is upset. I feel we are doing a version on cio...only cause she spends the whole time rolling around alternating between crying and screaming even tho we are in the room with her. But im just lost as to what else to do.
=(

Just want to add. She did this before we moved her, whwn she was still with us. Us moving her was one of our attempts to change things

[HotI]

my kids do same if I try to settle them in their room.

we did have dd going to sleep in her bed for awhile, but one of us was sitting there for hours, and she went through stage of kicking the wall... if dh falls asleep too it takes less time but I just got over it, so moved back to waiting till they fall asleep on couch with me. I wwould love for them to fall asleep in their beds, but ran out of energy and ideas to try to make it happen.

[Teeki]

We did go through a time with DD, I don't know how old, where she'd just kick up a huge fuss as bedtime. At first it was because she wasn't tired yet, going straight after her bath was no good so we'd let her play quietly until she told us it was bedtime - it was always around 8pm, instead of the 6:30 we'd been doing, and she went to sleep much easier. Then she stopped telling us when she was ready for bed, she was never ready and could stay up all night. We were back to her being a nightmare at bedtime. I think that might actually have been earlier this year, not long after I'd gotten pregnant because I remember thinking she can't do this when there's a baby. One of us would read to her then sing til she fell asleep. But a short way through the singing she'd ask for the other parent, until she was crying, screaming and kicking the wall. Other parent would come in and the whole thing would repeat.

We didn't do anything special to get past it. She still has nights maybe once a fortnight where for whatever reason she doesn't like what's going on. We just stay calm, talk to her, calm her and then keep singing. I do remember the tough times though and I did end up crying in frustration a few times

[little_O]

You poor things. I remember how much I hated bedtime because of how long it would take!!

I really think the fact she was left there by herself helped a lot. Might be a bit hard though If she has nothing keeping her in there.

Dd does go to sleep around 8.30-9 now though. She sleeps to about 8 in the morning. We've found the later bedtime causes a lot less trauma for everyone. It also means I can still get a decent sleep because I am a late to bed sleeper.

[~Kim~]

Hey T, It's normal man!!

I've had 3, all the same. All took a long time. All woke regularly until after 3yo (well DD2 still does it). We've had the same routine since DD1 was tiny. Bath at 5ish, dinner, teeth and then bed. DD1 reads to herself. DS has milk and isn't interested in stories most nights, DD2 feeds and then I hold her until she is asleep. They all go to bed around the same time, DD1 is obviously allowed to be awake later.
I have thought with every single kid that I couldn't do it any more and that there must be something wrong with the way I did it. But I'm a shocking sleeper. I never sleep though the night even when it's uninterrupted and I'm way more than 3yo lol.
My big kids are awesome sleepers most nights, but they are human so it's not the same every single night.
FWIW they get up at the same time every day that's why their bedtime is early. DD2 thinks before 5am is a cracker time to get up - uhuh!

[forshelby]

you're not alone! it takes me up to 3hrs to get through DS1's bedtime routine. the last hour or so is screaming and fighting me. he also wakes up to 5 times a night and has only slept through a handful of times. hes approaching 3.

our routine is very similar. This week in desperation we added a tv to his room. I was skeptical at first, thought it was a bad idea but I might have been wrong. we pop on charley bear after his bath and quiet (not quiet at all) play. I thought it might over stimulate him but having something to sit down and focus on helps him realize he's tired. after a couple of episodes I go in and tuck him in, sing his bedtime songs and kiss him nigh nigh.

he still fights and wants us to stay in the room. so last night I just said enough. I did all the usual tgen left the room. he snuck out repeatedly and every time I just said nothing and put him back in bed. I mean absolute silence. no payoff for getting up. it still took 20 mins of him getting out of bed every minute or so...... but it felt easier. less stressful. nobody yelled. it's so hard not to lose my cool when I'm exhausted and racing to sort dinner before DS2's next feed.
The moral of the story is that it's so hit and miss. I try to just surrender to the crapness and conserve my energy by not yelling GTF to sleep! lol....

I'm right here with you. crazed and exhausted. it's probably nothing you're doing that's causing her to fight sleep. some babies are just f****** tenacious little buggers.