I had the same issues when Matilda was younger... and honestly since she's turned 2 I've become more relaxed. BUT before 2 I saw no reason to give processed sugar products into her diet. I found nothing to indicate that it was something of use for her & her system. I found that when I went somewhere with sugary foods I did have to get Matilda away from them as she was inclined to eat the entire bowl of lollies without supervision. I always bring healthy alternatives to parties, even birthday parties. I have been to some birthday parties where they say there won't be all sugar but the alternatives are chips and cheerios and those sorts. So I always bring fruit and snacks with us and try to fill her up on them beforehand and in the early stages of the party. If Matilda is less full, she won't go the lollies bit time.
Gemma, I have been exactly the same with Jack, although I found it hard to keep all his food organic, so after a while it became only some of his food was organic. But he still only drinks water and milk and excpet for rare excpetions only eats healthy food. I'm lucky that he has no interest in sugary or other party foods. At his day care Xmas party there was heaps of party food and the only thing he'd eat was a cheese sandwich! I know it won't stay that way, and now that he's nearly 2 I am ok if he wants some party food on special occassions, but I'm glad he doesn't want to yet!
I'm also in two minds about what food to serve at his 2nd birthday party. I will definitely do healthy food for the most part (I'll have to for Jack to want it anyway), I'm wondering if I should do some chips or something as well for the other kids.
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