My darling almost two year old has learnt the word ugly, all the clothes I put on her are "ugly" apparently (I think they are cute and warm) then it's "I'll do it" meaning she wants to put in on herself but gets frustrated when she can't. So I try help and she runs off screaming! It takes a while to get her dress I start like half an hour before we have to go somewhere lol!
She's so independent and stubborn all good qualities tho
WOW it's great to know it's not just us, since DP has been home after his accident DD1 has been FERAL, it might not be all his fault afterall
Will have to come back and read all the replies but i'm finding if something is hers then it's HERS and no-one can touch it, she back chats, and refuses to eat and my god the TANTRUMS.
She has her good side and generally shares well with DD2, loves being outside etc but at the moment the I WANT, WHY and I CAN'T DO IT are really annoying me.
I've found that if we're outside all is great. Am in the process of getting a vege garden up and running, so at least we'll be able to do something productive outside.
It's just so full on all the time, and i guess i didn't expect it, thinking that the "terrible two's" was more a tantrum thing instead its an independence thing. So i guess we'll just tough it out and know that everyone's going through the same thing.
Good luck with your toddlers, may the force be with you....because we're definately going to need it
i try to keep telling myself that it's wonderful to have a child who feels emotionally secure enough with me that he can demonstrate the full force of his frustration in my presence. but some days i'm left wondering how my nemisis could be a very cute (mummy bias!) almost 2 year old who is less than half my height.
I find by not saying don't do that without offering an alternative seems to help a little. Eg: Instead of saying don't touch the TV say how about we play with your puzzle instead of the TV...it gives them something else to focus on rather than the 'naughty' behavior.
Lots of praise for the positive behavior.
I pick when I give a choice...I may ask do you want the teddy bear biscuit or the scotch finger, do you want the dress or the pant but things like bedtime it is a statement rather than a question...it is time for bed now instead of do you want to go to bed now.
I think if you are not going to follow through with their answer you don't answer the question...so if you ask them if they are ready to leave the park and they say no but you want to leave anyway it is better to just tell them time to go now.
I have some very frustrating days...my two girls are 11 mths apart and 2 and 3...they are partners in crime!!
Ahhhhh Two year olds - the most stubborn people in the world hehehehe
Seriously though, what works for us is a couple of key things
***Limit the word NO until its REALLY important, otherwise it just loses impact - eg for safety issues or golden rules. We use distraction tactics constantly, 99% of the time they work a treat. You may need to physically pick up your toddler and move them (even to another room) so your distraction is effective though
***I find that DS is his naughtiest on the day I work from home, and the reason why is that he is trying to get my attention while I am working - he doesn't care if its positive or negative attention, he just wants it either way. To address this I find that if I just stop what I am doing, even for 5 mins and engage with him in something he is happy as Larry and will then go on about his business (and I can with mine)
***If a tantrum starts I tell him I'd like him to stop and try my distraction technique, if he continues I either leave the room or turn my back, if there is no audience there is often no tantrum
***Lastly (and I use this to combat DSs 'selective deafness'), get down on hands and kness and in their face when you talk to them or ask them to do something, or put your arms around them so they cant turn away and talk softly, this helps me stay calm as its hard to yell at a toddler when you are practically nose to nose hehehehehe
Ps. Toddler tantrums are completely normal, so don't beat yourself up so much
my son hit terrible twos early and ive spent the last year wondering where did i go wrong? what am i doing wrong? what do i do?
his almost 3 and while we still have moments he is starting to get better
they all grow out of and i wish you lots of luck with this stage xoxo
i also used to think my son was out of control until a friend was complaining about the same things i was and realised my sons behaviour is normal
best of luck xoxo
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