hi honey((HUGS))how hard that situation sounds we went through a similar stage early on with my DD she wouldn't go to anybody but me and it really started to upset DH. I too have a really hard time listening to my bubba upset and in the end I had to get her used to falling asleep from awake or she wouldn't go into a proper sleep. Same problem she would be asleep on me and wake immediately when i put her down , so for my own sanity we put her to bed in her bedroom in her cot for daytime sleeps and I used a musical aquarium toy with played music and moved little fish and bubbles. This was hard for a while because she cried hard to start with so I would leave her for 5 mins close the door and wait if the crying continued I would return comfort her without picking her up replace dummy, wrap talk soothingly and try the process again gradually the time between crying and settling became less and then finally my dd got to the point that I could put her in the cot awake and she would fall asleep on her own watching the Aquarium toy,
hope that helps a little it worked for me eventually but it was hard work emotionally but I did get some sanity back.
At the sametime I had to try really hard to step back and let my DH find his own link with her and way to manage because I found that by taking over from him when she was not settling I really dented his confidence in handling his DD
Alliexxxx Goodluck