thread: Really really hard to settle...

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Mar 2005
    Sydney, NSW

    Really really hard to settle...

    Hi, my son is 5 weeks and he never sleeps for long. He is often grunting and trying to poo (usually from mid after noon to 6am is worse). At night he literally just grunts and strains all night long. We usually (touch wood) get one sleep at night of about 2-3 hours sleep but that' s it, the rest are shorter and are on me, or are when he and I fall asleep feeding. In the day he just doesn't sleep. IF Im lucky i might get one 45 min sleep, the rest I put him down and he's crying within 5-10 mins.
    He feeds fine and seems to need feeding every 2.5 hours, even though he feeds for about an hour each time. He doesn't grunt when feeding (except during early hours as I dont burp, Im too tired and half asleep). He doesn't arch or anything and is happy if I pick him up and feed. He has runny mustard poos and lots of them!
    Just wondered what other people do in this situation> I am cutting out dairy which is hard, and eggs, onion, choc, cafffeine, as my chiro told me to.
    I also have a HUB but don't use it all the time (not alot actually) as I find Im trying to settle in his bed, then its' feed time and it's a vicious cycle.
    My girls were also similar but I can't remember what I did and when it got better. Thanks

  2. #2
    Registered User

    May 2007

    I am wishing you all the best. I am pretty much in the same situation during the day too. And same as you, I am managing a toddler as well.
    Sleep school????
    I am thinking of trying to get into the one around here.

  3. #3
    BellyBelly Member

    Dec 2005

    my DD1 was like that. we just co-slept and fed on demand over night, it was the only way either of us got any sleep. she had silent reflux too, which the GP said was probably the reason for her unsettled sleep and wanting to sleep on me all the time. i cant quite remember when her day sleeps got better, must have been around the 6-12month mark.

  4. #4
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Feb 2006

    have you tried a dummy to settle???

  5. #5
    Registered User

    Oct 2007

    I hope no-one takes offence to this, but isnt it normal for a 5wk old to have a sleep pattern like this?? I mean, I know its awfully hard (ive been thru it!) but gee 5 wks is still awfully young...

    hang in there mumma2three - youre doing a good job

  6. #6
    Registered User

    Mar 2005
    Sydney, NSW

    Yes we've tried the dummy!! Spits it a mile!!
    As for sleep school Megie, I took both my DD's and after DD1 (whom it was the best thing ever) I felt I could've done a better job at home with DD2, so I will do it at home when he's older, I would like him to be at least 10 weeks as I dont think it would work when he's younger. I do gentle settling and at this point patting him while he's in the cot does nothing!! When I did it with DD2 at 9 weeks it worked a treat.
    As for it being normal at 5 weeks to be like this, I dont know that there's a normal! But I do think for the babies wellbeing, it is nice if they get a stretch of sleep. So Im talking here maybe one 2-3 hour stretch every 24 hours. The rest 20 minute catnaps, maybe 1 45 min catnap. That means he's getting 5 hours every 24. Recommended I believe is at least 16-20 in a 24 hour period. So just going on that, no it's not normal what J is doing!
    Also if there's a prob, like silent reflux, I guess it's good to hear from other people these are possibilities, I dont want him to be suffering unnecessarily.
    But I do understand what you mean SS, I dont' really think anyone knows what's normal or what to expect!!
    And this is number 3 for me, so Im well aware as my last 2 were not happy sleepers, but it's nice this time even to know there's others out there experiencing the same. Kind of lightens the load IYKWIM.
    And also if people have had experiencing with dropping things from their diet while breastfeeding and it worked, I'd LOVE to know. I feel Im giving up everything incase it upsets his tum, and really Im just hungry and want to eat what I want!!(and I am still eating alot, just not exciting foods, and Im a foodie, Easter will be hard with no chockie)_!! So if someone has experience it might save me the trouble!!!
    Thanks everyone for your input, much appreciated xoxo

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Feb 2008
    Country Victoria

    i went through the same thing. I dont think any housework got done until DD was 12 weeks. Just stick it out, it will get better xox

  8. #8
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Jun 2005
    Blue Mountains

    Kayla was like this! Grunting and straining and unsettled at night. She tended to settle lying on her tummy propped up on a cushion.. if that makes sense. DH would set her up and get her to sleep, and then he'd stay up with her while she slept (and played xbox LOL) coz we wouldn't leave her alone sleeping on her tummy. This helped me catch up a bit to be ready for the next night's wakings.

    I agree that it's normal for a 5wk old to wake & feed frequently, there's also a growth spurt coming up so i guess the best advice is to just try and squeeze in some zz's for yourself to help get through it. It'll setlle down eventually.

    If you think it's tummy pains or something, perhaps try some Infants friend or maybe one of the brauers remedies?

  9. #9
    Registered User

    Oct 2007

    Hi Mumma2three, i just want to give you a big that first 8weeks is so hard isn't it?
    I had a lot of trouble settling ds2 (still do to some extent) around that age. He had lots of trouble with wind and would constantly be grunting and bringing his knees up to his chest. I tried eeeeverything! I am bf also and i cut out ALL dairy (wouldn't even eat shop bought biscuits incase they were made with milk) chocolate,coffee,beans,brocolli,onion, etty much anything that i thought might give him gas, i even cut out wheat because the MCHN suggested it might be gluten intolerance. Honestly i really didn't notice a difference, he was gassy no matter what i did.
    I found if i gave ds2 a massage after his bath before bed that helped a bit. I read that if you rub their little tummy in a clockwise motion gently with the heal of your hand and then push their knees up to their tummy that can help, it did for ds2. Also bycicle legs works well too.

    Sorry i can't be of more help, i know this stage is really tough especially if you have a gassy baby. Stay strong, you're doing a great job and this hard time will pass

  10. #10
    Registered User

    Mar 2005
    Sydney, NSW

    Thanks guys. I think I'll go and try infants friend today.
    Was a bit worse last night after easter. I tried to steer clear of dairy etc, but did have about 6 baby easter eggs, and also a cream puff!! Then at night I had a blob of sour cream on dinner. STill not sure if it was any of that though,but he was worse!
    Did the massage and pulling legs up and it was good but he then wanted to eat so it was a bit of a vicious cycle....
    Will see how the infants friend goes xo

  11. #11
    StephV Guest

    Infants friend is awesome for a colic baby - hard to burp etc but they generally looked pained. You might just have some catnapper babies - it sucks but normal. My friend whose baby is 3 days less than mine feeds every 2 to 2.5 hrs and best stretch at night is 5 hours. Catnaps during the day - maybe 20 mins - but has more weight than my baby and seems to be doing okay. As long as your little one is putting on weight, then unfortunatley is probably normal for them.

  12. #12
    Registered User

    Dec 2006
    between the mountain & the ocean

    mumma2three do you eat bananas? I found that when i ate bananas and then fed ds he was exactly the same as your ds. He was ALWAYS grunting and struggling with gas and poo's at that age, yes it was frustrating and horrible to see him go through it, but we got through it. Big Hugs to you, you are doing a great job!

    Then when he got older, if he at bananas, he would be severely constipated. We have only just recently started giving him bananas again in small doses and he can now eat them with no worries!

    P.S, i did find that the massage helped ALOT, so keep that going. Good Luck.