Aidyn is very on again off again with his self feeding (using a spoon or fork) too.
He can feed himself fine with a spoon/fork, but if its anything runny or very messy (like weetbix) I tend to spoonfeed it to him... more just because when I'm rushing in the morning the last thing I have time to do is clean up the huge mess it makes!
Sometimes he only wants to feed himself and wont let us help him at all, but other times he's not interested in feeding himself and we have to hold the spoon for him.
If he's eating food that is easily held without a spoon or fork, then he is fine to feed it to himself with his hands.