She's stopped smiling :( What's going on??

[Acacia]

I may be completely ridiculous for even being concerned or worried, but it's really bothering me and I at least need to get it out.

As time has been going on DD has been smiling less and less, and yesterday she really wasn't wanting to maintain eye contact very much. She seems to have got a cold that's come on overnight - nothing bad, just the sniffles, but my instinct tells me that what's going on precedes her not feeling well by quite a bit. This has been happening more and more each week for the last month or so. Maybe I'm just being oversensitive??

We went through some time at least a month ago where she was learning to laugh, but it seems that has all stopped now too.

I'm really sad and I feel like I'm a bad Mum who must be doing something wrong for my daughter to not want to interact so much and exchange smiles with me or her Dad anymore. I'm trying so many things. Lots of tickle and movement games, lots of things that used to make her smile and laugh and grin like looking in the mirror, games with her hands and feet, raspberries etc. and... nothing. Perhaps she's just tired of Mum always being in her face all the time??

She's a little irritable at times, but nothing more than usual - fairly content a lot of the time, just so "neutral" when you try to get her to interact with you. We started solids about a week or so ago and that got off to a brilliant start, but now is not happening so much. I keep thinking is there something environmental affecting her like the solids, or her vaccinations, or is it something I'm doing, or is something wrong, or is it a stage at her age.... my head just keeps going round in circles about it and it's getting me pretty upset.

Has anyone had experiences where their bub stops smiling and interacting like they usually had and that it happens gradually over time (weeks and weeks)? I really feel like I'm doing something wrong and I wish I knew what was going on.

Sorry to be posting something so silly, but it's starting to really get me down

Miss C

[NaeNae]

Sorry no advice hun, I hope its just a phase and she gets back to her giggling smiling self soon. Offering you big hugs

x x x

[Phteven]

if it's really bothering you and your instincts are telling you that there is something going on that shouldn't be I think that you should trust yourself and make an appointment with a paediatrician or your family doctor.
It's better to be told that there's nothing wrong and feel a bit foolish than to ignore your mummy instincts.

[Junglemum]

This keeps crashing so i'll keep it short..... I agree with what Brontide said. Mothers instincts can be powerful, better to have her checked and set your mind at ease. Never worry about someone thinking you are silly. Better to be safe and silly than sorry.

[amberj]

I agree with checking out if you are concerned.

Having said that, I recall reading that bubs laugh the most in their 4th month then at any other time in their first year. I have to say this was true for us. When Peter learned to laugh, it was like a constant giggle fest. It was great!! Then it was like he went "yep, I know how to do that, time to move on". He still smiles and laughs, but he has developed a more complex range of emotions and expressions and seems to like to explore them too. I remember actually being quite sad about it at one point because I didn't have my super laughing baby anymore. I knew he wasn't unhappy and I wasn't worried about him- its just that he changed a bit over time. If its any consolation, at almost a year he seems to be getting more giggly again which is really fun.

I will post this and then go search and see if I can find where I read that- I cant remember at all, so it could be dodgey info. But it was right for us.

[amberj]

Hm, can't seem to find where I read it. But I DID read it!!!

[cindyb]

If it is playing on your mind- go and have her checked out! Its always best to know that everything is fine and know it for sure!

[Arcadia]

Hi Miss C, our babies are a similar age, and we also had a little stage of "regression" a few weeks ago. DD stopped cooing or smiling/laughing and I thought maybe she was sick. Then it all started up again quite suddenly, and we're back on track.

It is common for babies to have a wonder week at around 20 weeks (5 months) where they regress a little. But if you're worried I would definitely see someone.

Is she smiley in the morning, just after her longest sleep? I always find that the best time to make DD laugh.

[Acacia]

Thanks for all your support, ladies.

I think I was having a freak out morning when I posted. I have still had times where I've been a little bit concerned about her interactions, but I have spoken to my Health Visitor (like MCHN over here in the UK) late last week about it, and she helped me put it all into context a little more.

We've had 3 of my friends from Australia who stayed for 10 days and had only just left when I posted this thread, she's been teething on and off since 3.5 months old, we had a bout of thrush that we both had to get through a few weeks ago, and the cold that I mentioned when I first posted, and having started solids recently and adjusting to that too. No wonder she hasn't really felt up to smiling and interacting so much. I think having people staying in our house really made a difference - it was such a change for her, and it's taken a good amount of time for her to settle down after that. Developmentally I guess a lot is happening for her too at the moment, as she's getting up to all sorts of new things atm too.

She's smiling again at times, and I'm starting to really accept and know that it's something that really does depend on what's happening around her and to her - she's a pretty clued in baby with what's going on.

Thanks very much for your reassurance and for grounding me about it. I did get to read all your comments days ago now, but haven't had a chance to post back (cleaning up and putting the house back to normal after visitors is taking a loooooong time, especially when two of them stop back for a another visit for two nights only a week after leaving!)

Thanks again

[nic]

Having said that, I recall reading that bubs laugh the most in their 4th month then at any other time in their first year.

I remember reading this somewhere as well. It wouldn't have been Wonder Weeks by any chance do you think?

Miss C, That's great that you got to talk to your Health Visitor and are now feeling reassured.
I have noticed that once DS has 'mastered' something, he usually stops doing it lol. He has said dad, but now refuses to say it. Will say mum and nan and oh oh, but laughs when we say dad. He stopped playing with his feet for a little while too and has only recently in the last month or so, started with it again.

[rufalina]

Miss C I am sorry I missed this first time round...but pleased to hear DD is getting better. These babies dont make it easy for us.

I have noticed that once DS has 'mastered' something, he usually stops doing it lol. He has said dad, but now refuses to say it. Will say mum and nan and oh oh, but laughs when we say dad. He stopped playing with his feet for a little while too and has only recently in the last month or so, started with it again.

I am going to agree with Nic here, cause I know my DS learns something, then does it for a week or two, then stops, and comes back to it later. A week ago he was waving bye bye and making a tata noise, but now, no waves no matter what you do. I am sure it will be back soon though.

xoxo

[Stella'sMum]

Hi Acacia,

Just read your post and it sounds exactly like my daughter. It was quite a while since you wrote this post, how old was your daughter when you wrote this? My DD is a little over 5 months and is avoiding eye contact, and has stopped smiling and laughing!
What I am wondering is how your daughter went after this? Is she ok now? I'm really hoping its just a phase and it will pass..

Thanks so much,
Emma