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Thread: Sleep problems - DS and DH...

  1. #1

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    Unhappy Sleep problems - DS and DH...

    DS is six months and up until now has been a good sleeper. If he woke in the night it was only for a feed which he would have then go straight back to sleep. But over the past few weeks he has been waking because he keeps rolling over in his cot and then i cant resettle him easily. Or he has been screaming in his sleep - almost like a night terror. I have been picking him up and rocking him back to sleep or depending on the time, taking him into bed with us (if its like 5-6am and nearly time to get up anyway).

    Last night DS woke at 5am and Dh decided we weren't going to pick him up, he would be left to resettle himself. After putting his dummy back in a few times, and it seeming like he was going to drop back off to sleep, he started crying quite badly until i couldnt take it anymore and picked him up. DH cracked it and said the reason why he has been doing this is because i keep picking him up (this is starting to sound like it sound go in the relationship section..).

    So i have a few questions -
    Is it common for babies to go thru a change in sleeping patterns around this time?
    Does anyone have any settling advice because the patting on the shoulder and saying 'shh' doesnt work for DS
    Am i creating a problem by picking him up or having him in our bed
    What do you do when you have differences of opinion on parenting style - and one partner is quite stubborn because letting DS cry himself to sleep worked once for him..


  2. #2

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    Oh Em, I am really sorry. I don't have any suggestions for you, because it is really important that which ever way you go, you and your DH need to agree on it.
    Perhaps you could sit down together when you are both relaxed and talk about it? If you are against leaving him to cry, there are lots of articles on here that will support you in that. You can show your DH these and see if they change his mind. Also I hear the Science of Parenting book is good too if your DH is a reader.
    If you are interested in CC techniques (though if your DS is only waking once or twice a night, I'd be less inclined to do it, but that's JMO) then you could call Tressillian's helpline and ask them for advice, or look at the BabyLove book by Robin Barker for some assistance. Probably if you are going to do any crying techniques, you'll need to move your DS out of your room.
    In answer to your other questions:
    Is it common for babies to go thru a change in sleeping patterns around this time?
    I found DDs sleeping habits changed at around 4 months, and she got more and more wakeful from then til about 7.5 months, when we night-weaned.
    Does anyone have any settling advice because the patting on the shoulder and saying 'shh' doesnt work for DS
    It really depends on the road you feel comfortable travelling. I think you need to decide whether you will settle him with rocking, cuddling or feeding (ie out of the cot), co-sleeping (ie in your bed), or various CC techniques (ie in the cot).
    Am i creating a problem by picking him up or having him in our bed
    Certainly not. I am a firm believer in the argument that it is only a problem if it becomes a problem for you. If you are happy getting up to your baby, and/or sharing your bed, there's no reason why you shouldn't.
    HTH a little, and all the best.

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