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Thread: Sleeping and the dummy - update.

  1. #1

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    Default Sleeping and the dummy - update.

    Well, for all of Coopers sleeps since yesterday, it has been a real mission to get him to sleep because he is so used to the dummy. He has screamed the house down, demanding the dummy! Everytime I have picked him up to settle him, he is so tired, but his little mouth stays open, and he whimpers for it. It broke my heart, but it was so cute, reminded me of little baby birds waiting for their mother to feed them!!



    So tonight I put him to bed, and patted him for no more than 30 seconds, and he was asleep! I can't believe it. It is such a relief.

    I have done a little bit of control comforting, (I have let him cry, but never let it go for too long) and I have already noticed a difference. Usually in the day, he would have maybe a morning sleep for 45 minutes and then one in the arvo for about an hour and a half (at the most). Today he had onein the morning for an hour and half, and this afternoon for 2 hours! At about 1am last night, he was upset because he wanted the dummy, but he only woke up once, and slept through til 6.30am.

    So thanks everyone who gave me some advice, I am hoping that this is a sign of good things to come.

  2. #2

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    That's great! I read your earlier post and was curious how things would go. Nina too loves her dummy and I would love to wean her off it. Keep us updated with his progress.

  3. #3

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    Jodi, I know it has been only 2 days since I haven't given it to him, but I am so relieved, and I know that if I can get him off it, you can also get Nina off it too.

    Does she only have it for sleeping? Cooper did, and you know the dramas I have had, but I really believe it has been the cause of most of the night waking (see how we go, but I will update you on this...)

    I have just persisted with it, and whilst I have tried to do a bit of control crying (or is it comforting??), I knew it would be cruel if I was too full on with it, because he has just lost his dummy, and needs that comfort. So whilst I did let him cry, I went in when he was getting himself worked up, gave him a cuddle (and lots of little kisses on his face), so he felt secure.

    So when you are ready for it, be persistant with it, because as the Tresillian nurse told me on the phone, it is worse to take it from them and then give it back if it is too distressing, because it confuses them. So once you make the decision, personally, I wouldn't go back on it. Maybe see if she can find something else that will comfort her (maybe something that you have worn, so it has your smell on it.)

    Keeps us updated also. Thinking positive thoughts for you!

  4. #4

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    Yeah Nina only has it to go to sleep. Do you mind telling me step-be-step what you did with Cooper. I'm finding it hard to settle her when she gets worked up.
    Thanks

  5. #5

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    Me too me too me too...

    Alexa has had a bit of extra time to get attached to hers LOL...

    Would ear plugs be a wise investment ????

  6. #6

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    OK Jody and Mitch, here's what I did.

    I chose to stop giving it to him for his first morning sleep, because maybe night time can be a bit much for the both of you. I put him in his cot and wrapped him like normal, and the poor thing just laid there opening his mouth waiting for the dummy! I gave him a few pats, and then walked out. Then he screamed! (I found that the cries are at first a really angry cry - like 'how dare you take away my dummy!!') So I waited for a little bit...(this can be the hard thing...because I always came to him every time he cried...and as soon as he cried.) You have to work out what length of time is ok.

    When I could hear that he was getting himself worked up, I went in and gave him a pat. For the first day, this wouldn't settle him at all, so I would pick him up and give him a cuddle. Do whatever works for the both of you, like when you normally calm them down - just do that. If it is rubbing their tummy, patting their back, or anything that they are familiar with. Cooper loves to be cuddled and I would say to him 'just calm down' over and over again in a really soothing voice, and give him lots of kisses on his face. Then once he did calm down, I would put him in his cot, turn him on his side and pat his bottom (this normally always soothes him) and then walk out. Most of the time he would start crying again, and I would come in and do the same thing. Some people would say leave it longer each time, but Cooper would get more upset each time, so do what you feel is right.

    I pretty much just did that every time I put him down for his sleep, and by the second day, he was like a new baby. Last night at bed time, as soon as I laid him in his cot, he was asleep!! He has never done that! I hadn't even wrapped him.

    I must stress that this process has worked so far for me personally. I didn't do it for selfish reasons, if anything lately, Cooper has been much happier, so far has slept much better, and goes to sleep much easier. I know also that a happy well rested Mum, is a happy well rested baby. It's only early days, but it seems to be getting better. He woke up in his sleep last night about midnight, and instead of having to rock him back to sleep, I just came in and rubbed his tummy for 10 seconds, and he was alseep again. I hope soon that he can settle himself.

    Also - what is really weird is that Cooper has always been a spewy baby. Whenever I picked him up from his cot after his sleep, he would have a spew, and also often during the day, but since I have taken the dummy away, he has barely spewed at all! Has anyone heard of this??

    Anyway, I know I have blabbed on, but I just wanted to let you know that it can be done. Cooper is only SOOOO much better for not having the dummy. Whilst it was great for when he was younger, its making life so much better not having it. I just didn't realise what a difference it can make until we don't have it anymore.

    All I can say is just keep going once you start, and give them lots of love and cuddles. I do think it is ok to let your baby work out that they can settle themselves - I don't think it is good to let your baby cry to the point of them being so distraught. But they will learn through it that they are able to go to sleep without you always there patting them.

    And for us it only took 2 days, others babies may need one day or 5 days, but as I said earlier, I wouldn't recommend giving it back to them once you take it off them, because that will make them very confused.

    Good luck and please let me know how you both go!!

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