The side car has worked for us with 2 kids so far. we start in our bed to 1 side, then we amp up the growing up and into the side car, then move it away a bit with a guard, then into their room with a parent if need be for awhile, and slowly in their own bed, by themselves.
Good luck, its a long road, but a good 1.
We did the side car cot from 12 months. Our cot mattress was slightly lower than the main bed (and we didn't raise it) so dd had to wake to get on to the main bed, rather than just roll over on to it. At first, we would feed to sleep and put her in the cot asleep. Later, DH or would lie on the bed next to her and hold her hand and she would go to sleep that way. SHe would crawl over when she woke and wanted a feed, but over time she slept longer in the cot. I was also able to start to put her back in the cot after a feed and rub her back or hold her hand if she stirred.
Day sleeps were ok because she was used to co-sleeping anyway and so knew how to get off the big bed. Generally, she only went to sleep with a feed and so was put in the cot asleep. when she woke she would crawl over the bed and get off the other side (if i hadn't heard her and gone down there first).
When dd had stopped feeding through the night and sleeping longer, we moved her into her room in to a king single bed with a side barrier. Next to the bed we have a comfy chair that we sit in when getting her to sleep (she rarely goes to sleep when breastfeeding these days ). We thought that DH or i might end up sleeping in there with her for awhile, but the transition was much smoother that we thought it would be.
How often does she wake? The up and down thing is pretty horrendous - with DS I gave up and jsut waited it out and he was good in his own bed from around 22 months. I haven't even tried with DD. We have the side car cot and she doesn't even sleep in there much (well, she rolls backwards and forwards during the nigh)
if you side car you can stick a wedge of foam or something between the mattresses so she's sort of contained in there but you have close, easy access. Dh was able to adjust it so it was roughly the same height as the bed. i've put the foam at the back of the mattress now so it's easier for me to scoot over and feed her.
She only wakes once per night and then comes into my bed BUT she's often restless and I reckon I wake up between 10-20 times per night on average even though she's asleep. I don't know how many times she'd wake up if I was always trying to resettle her in her own cot.
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). We thought that DH or i might end up sleeping in there with her for awhile, but the transition was much smoother that we thought it would be.
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