thread: Teaching toddlers about stranger danger?

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  1. #1
    Registered User

    Mar 2006
    7,046

    DD was like that - we constantly repeated to her that hugs (and kisses) are only for Mummy, Daddy, and good friends. If we saw her going over to someone we didn't know, we'd remind her to only say hello "DD, you can say hello but come straight back please" which she has always done. It was a big concern for me because DD would gravitate towards men. These days she is very good. She will shelter behind or next to me if someone approaches her; she will look to me for an ok to interact with someone, she only hugs people she knows.

    Oh, something I did on the occassions DD would hug strangers was say "DD that was a nice hug, but remember, we only hug family and good friends". I know this was upsetting to a couple of people who received the hug, but I'm afraid that teaching my daughter to be safe is more important (to me) than sparing a strangers feelings.

    HTH

    MG

  2. #2
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber. Love a friend xxx

    Sep 2008
    Melbourne
    1,424

    Not sure whether this would be too much for a 17 month old to grasp, but it might help to start and repeat a few times as she'll catch on when she gets a bit older.

    This is what we do with kids at my work (children with developmental disabilities) to teach them about boundaries, strangers etc. and I think it's a great lesson for all kids.

    Get a big sheet of paper and draw on a big circle. This is your "circle of friends". Inside the circle, paste pictures of family and close friends. These are the people we can cuddle and kiss. Outside the circle, paste pics of 'strangers' - cut outs from magazines etc. These are the people we can wave to and say hello but we don't give them a cuddle.

    When you're out and about, point out people... "are they in our circle? No. No cuddles but we can say "hi!". When you're at Grandma's house... "is Grandma in our circle? Yes!! We can give her a big cuddle!"

    You can make this more complex as the child gets older. Have a couple of concentric circles - inner circle is for people we are very close to and we can touch, cuddle and talk to when we're sad....
    The next circle out is for shop-keepers, police, teachers etc. These are the people we can ask for help or have a little chat to when we see them.
    Outside the circle are strangers. These are the people we don't talk to. Sometimes we say hi or smile. It's safe to talk to them if Mummy or Daddy is talking to them.

    You can also to this exercise with hoops on circles on the floor and get the child to place the photos where they belong which makes it a bit more interactive and flexible - eg. we didn't know this person before, she was a stranger. Now she is our friend... (but this level is obviously for older kids).

    HTH.

    BTW, it might be a bit scary and inappropriate, but I can't help but think your little one is a sweetheart for wanting to share the love with everyone!