Thanks for all your replies, i really appreciate it.

I have since spoken to a few of dh's work colleagues whom have gone to ss and they have pretty much said very similar things to you guys - eg re-settling after 40mins if he wakes and getting into a more sleep, feed, play routine.

I am starting to implement these but still finding it hard to shush him without picking him up as he gets worked up quite quickly when he cries but i have noticed a difference already just by not letting him stay awake over 2 hours.

I know its going to be hard but its just got to change. Its going to be easier this weekend with dh home to help me out and it will help me get a bit more confidence in whats changing