Thanks everyone. DD1 was refuxy. I wonder if that's why she didn't take one?? She just wanted a boob all the time.
Today was my first day home on my own with both kids (DH just went back to work after 2 weeks parental leave) and the dummy has helped so much. If bub stirs, I just run in, put the dummy in her mouth and she goes back to sleep! I never knew resettling a baby could be do easy after DD1 being so difficult!
But I will def try to keep it to bedtime only.
Thanks for all your advice