WRT leaving your baby with someone, I mostly wanted to bring DS with me everywhere, and when he was a bit older I was happy to leave him for short stretches to do things (then there were the times I HAD to leave him, like for exams!) and because I'd had him to myself when I did, he was not so insecure to be left for these times We had amazing bonding (so I hear you there) and this made leaving him possible.