We have decided to try DS 8 months on Ferber style self settling.
Some sleeps (during day usually) he will have a cry or grizzle but fall asleep within 5 - 10 mins.
At bed time (evening) and during night wake ups its a different story.
DS cries if I leave the room, but calms if I stay in there with him - but dosent go to sleep. He will just lay there not going to sleep, and then gets very upset when I leave the room. This went on last night (middle of night) for near 2 hours till I took him into bed and fed him. I dont think he was real hungry (though probably by then with all his complaining ). But he had a feed and then lay there awake till I fed him some more and then transfered him sleepy back to his bed.
This evening he has been crying and angry, but dosent seem hungry. I dont want to offer him milk anyway, because he had a big dinner and good BF. I am trying to break his habit of waking regular throughout evening for feeds.

Anyway, how long is it ok to keep this going on? Is there a point (of time) that if your LO is still not fallen asleep you should try something else?
I dont want us and him to go through an hour of comforted crying only to then pick him up and feed him ( as thats giving him mixed signals - and is just horrible for all of us ).