hmmm the ins/outs pros/cons of dummies?

[dusty]

My DD loves to suck, her fingers, my nipple, our little fingers, anything really. It seems to comfort her and help her fall to sleep. Once she is asleep she stays asleep very well but its the falling to sleep she needs some assistance with which we have been using safe sleep space/no cry solution techniques with some degree of success but it takes quite a while and by the time she does fall asleep she is pretty exhausted.

My DH and mum have suggested she may benefit from a dummy for settling, as she gets quite fussy before sleep and wants to suck suck suck but wont attach to my nipple properly to drink but rather play with it and still gets upset. I'm also concerned she may damage my nipple if I continue to let her play as she is getting quite strong and forceful and fussy on it.

I'm now considering trying her on a dummy to see if it gives her some comfort before sleep. While she can find her fingers they don't satisfy her for very long.

Our BF and attachment are going really well so I am a bit less concerned now about dummy affecting it.

Any thoughts on the pros/cons etc from your experience with dummies? What sort of dummy would I try her on (eg rubber/organic etc) as I have absolutely no idea what is available or suitable on the market.

TIA!

[*LittleMissSummer*]

I didnt want my DD to have a dummy. But because she had trouble feeding in the hospital she was given one to help with her sucking reflex. Now we are quite happy to have her on one. It helps her settle to go to sleep. Thats all we use it for.

Once teething is over and done with i will be getting rid of it.

And i recommend a silicone dummy as the latex ones have that rubber taste and babies tend to gag.

[~Trish~]

All three of mine have had dummies. It caused no issues with BF'ing at all. DD wouldn't take one until 3 months of age, I just kept persisting because she was SO hard to settle off to sleep. Once she finally took a dummy she settled really quickly and sanity returned .

Pros - Great sleep association, awesome settling tool, gives your BB's a break, handy in the car when bub is due for a feed and you're nearly home (buys time!), great for the "arsenic hour".
Cons - Some babies wake constantly during the night wanting their dummy to be put back in (not a prob for my bubs luckily ), having to wean them off the dummy later.

If you DO buy a dummy, I recommend getting one from a brand that has been around for a long time. Nothing worse than your bub only liking one type of dummy and then it's discontinued! I used silicone teat dummies for my bubs. DS1 had Nuk dummies, but they were expensive so I went for Avent ones for DS2 and DD which were a bit cheaper.

It might be worth giving it a go for a day and then deciding if you want to continue? Good luck deciding!

[mrsmac]

I found dummies to be a lifesaver!! DD1 quit hers at 6 months but the other 2 kids had to be made quit LOL Riley especially was an addict but you know what he's 4 now and hasn't had a dummy for over a yr and it hasn't affected his life at all.
Mine all loved happy baby cheap ones, I know there have been some issues with them lately but I never had a problem and they were really cheap and available everywhere so I had no hassles getting one if we accidentally went out without one or lost one.

[briggsy's girl]

DD has a dummy - but only for settling. as soon as she's asleep, she spits it. she gives it to us when she wakes up in the morning and doesn't ask for it until she naps.

she was using me as a pacifier, i was doing the single mum thing while DH was away at work - i NEEDED a break - we held out til she was about a month old, and the thought bugger it - she would then settle for other people and i was able to feel human again! i don't think we'll have much trouble weaning her as she only has it at sleep times and often spits it out while settling anyway.

[marknjo]

DD was given a dummy in hosp while they tube fed her to get her to associate sucking with feeding so we didn't have a choice but in saying that I didn't have a problem giving her one.

My nephew is 6 and still sucks his thumb and was never given a dummy.
DD gave up her dummy on her own at 2 1/4 without any issues.

It is easier to take away a dummy than stop thumb sucking.

We talked up the dummy fairy for weeks before DD gave hers up and she decided when she was ready for the fairy to take her dummies and give them to the new babies that were born. It worked well!

We used NUK silicone dummies. She wouldn't have a bar of the rubber cherry shaped ones. One day we left her dummy at home and DH found a different brand in a shop that glowed in the dark! It was great as we were able to spot it in the dark if she woke during the night!

[onthefly]

We used one a bit when DS was young and very unsettled, but ony ocasionally. As he got more settled, we didn't use it so much. One day it'd been nearly a week since last use, I tried he would'nt have it. end of dummy.
I think they can be useful things. If breastfeeding is well established, then there's less of a risk there. There are 2 possible worries in regards to bf, btw, not just the sucking action, but by satisfying the sucking reflex away from the breast they may not feed enough. If she's feeding well and gaining weight etc, then it's all good.

My only real issue with dummies is that they are unattractive

ETA - the thumb/finger sucking thing is pretty random also. DS sucked his fingers till 9-ish months, but never since. It's not a given that they'll do one or the other.

[Persephone1]

Yep, got dummies here. I was always a bit "anti-dummy" before DS was born but he was given one in the NICU and we brought it home from the hospital with us. At first I would only use it sparingly, but it's become a life-saver. Sometimes he wants to suck to sleep and gets upset when milk arrives with his sucking, cause he's not actually hungry.

It's also useful to pop the dummy in when bub needs a feed and you're not able to provide it straight away - like when you need to do something before a feed, like a toilet visit Or when you're in the car.

Oh, and sometimes DS is hungry but suffering with wind - putting the dummy in can help him move the wind without him spurting milk everwhere.

Cons - I read that dummies can stop babies from being encouraged from talking and learning how to use their mouths. I think you counter this by not putting it in when bub looks like she want to chat. I also find them a bit unattractive. I think sometimes it can be hard to wean them from the dummy later, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

[Fleur]

Three of my kids have had dummies, DS2 wouldn't take one as hard as I tried he preferred my nipple.
Pros & cons pretty much as mentioned above, great for settling, sleep association & as a general comforter. Usually Pie just has it to sleep with but she's sick again ATM & the dummy is getting more of a workout than usual while she feels miserable.
Cons - PITA if you have to go on a dummy hunt in the middle of the night, can interfere with breastfeeding early on but if feeding is established & you're not having any dramas I wouldn't think it would cause much of a problem.

Both of the older kids just ditched theirs when they were ready, around 2-ish I think. I also went with the idea that a dummy would be easier to wean than thumb sucking, but I don't know if that's right, just my idea.

We always used the happy baby cherry ones but I do believe a lot of babies will have a preference all of their own

[OceanPrincess]

Being a parent I am already challenging all the previous 'I will never...' statements I made - dummies being a big one of them

Glad she seems to be liking it and it's helping, dusty!

WRT your comment above - I think that's a very common thing to go thru, I actually started a thread about it recently!

[*Beema*]

We weren't going to be dummie people either, DD had one in NICU/SCB only during NGT feeds so that she would develop a suck reflex, but she couldn't suck on it even though it was a tiny premmie one, the bubble shape, we had to hold it there for her. Then when we went home we avoided one until she was 9 weeks old and I'd lost the plot and a friend had been with me all day and said she just wanted to suck so I messaged DH he agreed to try and she took to it for a bit, then spat but over time she took it and it was a lifesaver as she was a sucker We used the Nuk one's as well they were the same shape as the teats we had used on the bottles and she was able to suck on those better than the TTCTN bottles. She still has it now but only for bed time and hands it back to us when she gets out of bed.

This one will probably get one as well, but I am looking at the gum drop dummeis

[Lady-bug]

I think babies who need to suck for comfort are going to do it no matter what. So I figured I could always get rid of a dummy later on but I couldn't get rid of a thumb/finger! And once we gave DS a dummy it took him a while to get the 'hang' of it in regards to keeping it in whilst sleeping, so that should improve for your DD.

[visitor10]

Ditto to allot of ladies above!

Okay

Pros: 1) I thought it was way better than a thumb/finger as it can always be gotten rid of 2) A baby is going to want to have something to comfort them whether its a blankie, thumb/finger, dummy or you (which is very hard indeed if they get into that routine) so I thought the dummy was going to be the best idea 3) This is going to sound a little negative...but sometimes when you are out & about you need them to be not so "vocal" & I find the dummy does the trick! 4) It is great for easing teething pain..the poor little ones do get awful miserable sometimes! HOWEVER I would like to mention that Alana really does have her dummy with her very rarely at home...that way they get used to it not ALWAYS being with them.

Cons: 1) They can drop them during sleep & this can unsettle or wake them (sometimes this also depends on the dummies you buy...we use avent ones...and even though they are a very different shape to my nipples Alana still loved them AND me...lol. Though some friends of mine have been using the cherry ones & a few of their bubs wake constantly..but I have a feeling it is because of the shape that it just "pops" out) 2) Sometimes (depending on the baby & the way you do it) it is not easily gotten rid of. But there has been lots of suggestions made such as buying a teddy if they give you the dummy or getting them to give it to the dr...but all of this has to wait I believe until the little ones can understand what is going on though so a least you can reason with them to a certain extent so they give it up willingly & you can remind them of it later .

Hope this helps sweetie!

PS You are doing wonderfully gorgeous! You will work it all out as you go along

[Olive]

DD2 needed to suck alot for comfort/sleep as a newborn, we gave her a dummy on occasions then she stopped using it at 4 months

[Jandals]

We're dummy users here. DD had silent reflux and the dummy was such a life saver - she only used it to settle to sleep though. DS only uses his to get off to sleep (and not always) then spits it out. I've been thinking of getting rid of it but if it's too hard I'm happy for him to have it. I use the Nuk dummies as I found the Avent ones fell out too easily when DD was a baby because they are very flat.

DD is seeing a speech therapist and I asked if having a dummy would have contributed to her problems and she said that as long as the child has the opportunity to talk ie. dummy's not in all day and hanging out of their mouth while talking, then dummies can actually help as the muscles used for sucking are the same as what we use for sounds/talking. I was really surprised and relieved at that because I'd always felt guilty for allowing the dummy for so long (DD was close to 3)!