thanks so much for sharing ladies and I suppose it's hard to know what is normal when I don't know what is happening in other houses
He doesn't always take an hour but he certainly can. I think it is mainly when he is tired etc... but OH thinks I am just making up excuses. He looks after DS 1 night a week (so he cooks him tea, baths him and dresses him etc...) while I go out and he says that it is a battle to get him to eat. I don't buy it but that is how he feels. OH feels that it is a battle to get him to eat tea everynight.... I don't think it is.
I am up for compromising.... will have to renegotiate I think, cause I agree we need a united front. Again many thanks ladies.
We sit at the table with no toys or TV, but DS can muck around chronically eating his tea. OMG that boy can talk! He just yaps and yaps and seems to forget that his dinner is right in front of him! We usually listen to the babble but give a reminder every couple of minutes that his tea is getting cold. He has until DH and I have finished eating to have his tea finished or it gets taken away and he gets no play minutes after bath time (has never actually happened, but works as a threat). He has to ask to leave the table and if he hasn't eaten enough we tell him he has to eat 3 bites of this and one of that etc and he will usually do it quickly to be able to leave.
If he mucks around too long and doesn't eat enough then he goes to bed hungry. It is his choice, he knows the consequences.
ETA, we aren't starving him - he snacks all day and he only eats a token dinner anyway.
Personally I would go mental waiting around for an hour for the kids to eat - I can definitely see your DH's point of view.
I agree, no toys, no TV and if you could all sit up to the table together you might find you really enjoy it! Also, eating earlier works in our house, we often eat together at 5pm. Don't know if your OH is home at that time, so if it's possible?
Does your DS eventually eat all of the food you put in front of him? Maybe he eats so well during the day he is full at dinner time and doesn't need as much food as you are serving him?
FWIW, I was a reeeeaallly slow eater when I was a kid. I was always the last to finish my dinner, regardless of what it was or how hungry I was. I really wasn't trying to be difficult, I think I just couldn't swallow my food until it had been well chewed and I didn't like large mouthfuls. We sat at the table, no TV (dinner was a very social occasion and we all talked about our days instead) and I was encouraged to eat if I really slowed down. I know it was frustrating for my mum and often she would start cleaning up before I had finished while my dad sat with me. If he got frustrated, he would eat mouthfuls off my plate while mum wasn't looking! As an adult, I am still a slowish eater and usually the last to finish. I hate that feeling of shoving food in my mouth and swallowing before it's properly chewed. Food should be enjoyed!
So, my advice is no distractions, all eat together, gentle encouragement - and plenty of patience!
I wrote this thread https://www.bellybelly.com.au/forums...please-168173/ a while ago because I was at my wits end. Dinner felt like a battle every single night. Since I wrote it and got heaps of good advice, DH and I have chilled a bit with dinner time. DS seems to be a really slow eater so in his case, as long as he is eating, then an hour is pretty standard for him. I do try to push it along a bit though, because seriously I have better things to do with my time. If he is messing around and hopping up and down from the table and not eating, he is now given a warning, and then another warning (can't help myself ), and then his dinner is taken away, he brushes his teeth and goes to bed. I also found out that DH was a super super slow eater as a kid, and used to take up to 3 hours to eat tea. His mum had way more patience than me!
I've also realised that although tea is my main meal, lunch would be DS's main food time - so as long as he eats well during the day, if tea is a bit of write off, then I'm learning to be ok with that. We have no tv and no toys but DS is a HUGE chatter, which I do understand because it's pretty much the first time he see's DH all day and he gets excited.
Every night this week though, he has eaten tea in under 20 mintues - he has started playing 'Masterchef' at teatime - he is Gary, I am George and he scores every bite and I have to write the score down on a piece of paper. It's bizarre but I'm sticking with it as long as he eats lol!
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), and then his dinner is taken away, he brushes his teeth and goes to bed. I also found out that DH was a super super slow eater as a kid, and used to take up to 3 hours to eat tea. His mum had way more patience than me!
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